All this air around me and I still feel suffocated and this is nowhere near what I have calculated they ask me "What's wrong?" and I tell them you wouldn't understand because it's too complicated this is why I'm always so isolated do you know how long I've waited? I never wanted to be the person she created they look at me not at all fascinated and I'm sure if I leave they would feel the need to celebrate it they tell me all these feelings that I am having are just "too overstated" and that actually makes me feel irritated and not at all motivated just makes me feel... suffocated
There was something that I wanted to say, but it was muted before I could utter the words. Creeping, like vines, strangling a tree limb it comes slowly, over time, unforgiving.
The bark cracks and falls to the ground, flying acrobatics this way and that as the wind carries it, gently it so lands. Those are NOT the words I thought I'd say; but they crept towards my mouth and, like insects escaping that suffocating tree, they were free.
Doggy paddle isn't swimming, It's "active drowning." The little pieces of information Learned in the conference room of a YMCA, Preparation to carry a red tube And sit in a chair, observing; To preside over age extremes Swimming to and fro.
I sit in my chair Carefully keeping track As people come in and out of the room. Someone comes up to me; I stand up, shake their hand, And maintain eye contact just as I was taught. They walk away, leaving me to sink Deeper and deeper into this chair.
i wish i never be a fish, the sad little, sensitive, unappreciative. i wish i never knew how it feels to feel a thing if in the end i couldn’t even bare to feel anything. i wish i wish i wish, i wish i knew if i would be this suffocated, i wish i never tried just to fall into the groud, i wish i never be born.
i hate my birthday so much because this is the first day ever of my life that **** happens to me. yet the worst of all the time through the year is always my birthday every year. i dont even care anymore. nothing is matter.