There is a fine line
between
selflessness and self-deprecation

(and I have crossed it)

My words don't Shake like William's,
nor, do they Frost like Robert's.
×
My words barely lead the Way like Ernest's,
nor, do they have Hughes like Langston's. 
×
I don't know how much my Wordsworth like William's,
nor, do my words keep people ******* like Edward's.
×
My words are far from an Angel like Maya's,
 and they are barely Lovecraft like Howard's.
×
Indeed I profess, my words cannot do those listed things, but, my words can be a great expression of me.
×
(sumairu•¶oetry)

I haven't been eating much.
My shaking hands beg for nourishment,
And only then I feed it.

I've been sleeping a lot,
but it's disturbed, restless.

I've been drinking more and more.
The red wine at night soothes my sadness.
It even makes Him feel farther away.
Just to wake up groggy, unclear, sad.
Alone.

Here I am, punishing myself.
Unable to wrestle out of this cycle.
The wicked voice inside my head is back,
and She's louder than ever.
She likes it when I'm catatonic and vulnerable.

I wish I could make her toes curl like the end of fitted sheets
But i'll probably disappoint then like Fox's casting of Mystique
I wish I could command attention without saying a word
But to do that I'd have to have charisma, wait... what's that a bird?
No it's a trait that I don't possess.
I guess you can't correct a problem you don't know how to solve
The truth is i'm so easily worn out I don't know what to do at all
Not physically but socially, that batteries drained
I'd complain but my lack of confidence weighs enough on my brain

But let's get back on track with this train
I hope that I can make her squeal with a kiss and spill passion with a hug
But I'd actually have to be desirable, unlike, say a Chagas bug.
Hell the bug might have better luck than me
I guess that's why I have to express myself lyrically
Because my head goes one way and my mouth another
Just forget it I'd be hopeless as a lover...

Heartless *****,
Got no soul to love

Heartless *****,
Parasite feeding in our skin

Heartless *****,
Don’t worry they do love something
That something is themselves

Heartless *****,
spiked their life bringer into a flaming can

Heartless *****,
watching the world from a cave.

Heartless *****,
sleeping with friends.
No benefits attached.

Heartless *****
doesn’t care if you like them

Heartless *****,
actually delighted they’re messed up

How about you keep you’re mouth sewed shut
and tear out your larynx.
Words from that useless hole are hollow.
Manipulation your mistress
Depression your *****
You take
  and abuse
    and lie.
Just chose one or the other you-

Heartless *****,
Stay quiet, behave.

Heartless *****,
do they even have a name?

Heartless *****,
It’s still beating in the trashcan, cold.
I am that Heartless *****

four hours of sleep
three days of fluffy frills, lace, and cat ears
four days of flannels and dark eyeliner
five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes of good music

how to create a me
but you wont want to.

side effects include:
depression
anxiety
isolation
manipulation

is it worth it?