Even when I'm lost,
I come back here,
to these pages,

I tell them about you; my love,
about me; my lust,
write down my thoughts; my loss,

so even when I'm gone,
you can always,
find me in these pages,

hear my cries; my tears,
share my lies; my fears,
feel my love; my dear.

They said
it was 'First Love'
the best feeling
I've experienced throughout
this mortal world

Being loved
by the guy I loved
It felt too good to be true
Cloud 9
was all I felt

I was clueless
whether the love was real or not
whether he faked it or not

But if he did
he was one of hella fine actors

My whole world is bad.
Besides black I see dark.
Between life I see desilution.
Not knowing who am I.
I feel sad and mad.
Mad because I lost myself.
Sadly alive for my reality.
Discovering who you are is not fun.
Im madly sad.
Never lost before.
For the first time I want to die because I'm not ready to cry.
There are ghosts inside my head.
So heavy to fight.
I cant see more than myself blocked by someone else.

Please set me free