If it kills you, it kills you. Something someday definitely will. But until it does, until it gets so hard that breathing in and out seems impossible, that the thought of waking up keeps you from sleeping at night, that the thought of not being able to sleep another night gets so heavy that you'd rather drown yourself than try to swim across the **** ocean that everyone else is swimming in, maybe a little closer to the shore, maybe a little further to the other side, you better live and make sure that it's worth the death that you've been dreading for so long!

EXPECTATIONS, what are expectations?
It was a 12-letter word that I’ve set as a standard
Where anything way below, acceptance is just too hard
It was the moment I kept myself away from freedom,
Freedom of doing what I want to do
Freedom of not having fun to what I love.

Am I still the person who is willing to win this battle?

Now that I think of it,
Your opinion affects my system as it greatly matters.
I lose self-reliance because our belief prominently differs
Your words direct my capacity into incapability

I lost myself,
I lost my long-term built confidence, just so yours be followed.
I believed I never made the right choice,
The moment your opinion kept the majority’s mind closed.
I was never person I ought to be.
I was blinded by the pressure you form inside me
Letting me consider I wasn’t doing enough,
Luring me into what our society want,
Persuading me that in all things that I do, I can’t.
No, I am not a loser but. . .
I’m tired.
Set by high expectations
Labelled by your opinions
and
Filled by Pressure
Can I survive this battle?
These three just consumed my positivity.
All I have wasn’t enough,
my fighting spirit reached its limit,
I think I’ll be losing the battle.
I think I need to quit.
I quit.

I quit reaching your expectations
I quit on becoming a puppet of your opinion
I quit being a slave of pressure.
I’ll quit just so I could win this battle.

I’ll stand on my own standards and expectations
I’ll do what I think is best for me even though failure would arrive and teach me a lesson
Societal standards are up but I’ll set my own
I’ll be the queen of my freedom, where positivity overflows and life continuously goes on

Your opinion may somewhat matter
But you can’t have the compass to my journey of becoming stronger
I’ll be learning to eliminate
Just for my self-choices could dominate
I’ll turn pressure into power,
Power to survive, power to become better
I will win this battle.
No more expectations,
No insignificant opinion
No more peer-pressure to stop this motion.
No more stops just rest.
Victory is in me, all I have was the best.
I am a quitter on quitting.

Nothing I do matters
I toil and toil away
But nothing I do matters

I am forever replaceable
Forever flawed
Forever scrutinized by society

I melt, fill a different mold
Yet the scrutiny continues  
I melt again  
Scrutiny persists  

How many more times should I melt?
Fill a different mold
Before I surrender
To the unforgiving scrutiny?

Everyone wants to work where they are happy,
I worked where i used to feel scrappy.



Each day i went to office with a new hope,But each day, i was the only one to cope.



She made sure my life was hell under her rule,Nobody thought she was cool,She made sure i looked like a fool.



I was a free bird who wanted to learn,This was something i wanted to earn,But no i was joked in return.



Having no options in my hand,With deep sorrow in the end,I said to my boss i quit..i quit



I known i could have fought this injustice,But knowing there would not be any justice,With no options left i said i quit ..i quit.



I know it was hard for my maa n paa
But this was a rightful law,



As i couldn't suffer alone,Just to ensure  i was in a comfort zone,So i said i quit ...i quit

I tap my index finger on the top of my cigarette,
The pier of ash that was building topples off the end.
The can is at my lips,
A pleasant burn on the throat when swallowed,
Imperial stout,
The warming burn reminds me of good bourbon.
The ***** beer agreeing with my palate.
A hard day started early,
My early ending is it's own reward,
To relax,
Kick back
And let the tunes carry me away.

Yellow syrup coats the glass
Held together by rainbow metal
Flashing lights line the coal-black screen
This is my vice
Begging me to cave in
To take one taste
I'm overwhelmed with sadness
But I see through its disguise
If I fight the cravings
My brain attempts to manipulate me
Back into the drug
Sadness
Anger
Frustration
Anxiety
They're all ploys
Trap doors to fall through
Right back into my addiction
I have to check myself
To remember that quitting
Is an active choice I make
And even though it's only been 5 hours
It's better than nothing