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Aimée Sep 28
Living with social anxiety,
Is like living in survival mode every single day,
Like trying to dodge loads of obstacles in a video game,
It's like standing on the edge of a cliff,
While your heart pounds out of your chest,
While you sweat & you overthink,
And you take shallow breaths.
You don't like crowded places,
Because when you're in one,
The panic attacks are overwhelming,
Self conciousness is not at all fun.
Try being around people,
While you awkwardly stand there,
And your mind is racing even though you don't want to care,
People start to notice, then people start to stare,
So then you end up stuck back in your house,
And depression takes a chair.
It's a storm in a teacup,
That goes round and round,
And you don't know what to do,
How to try and get back out.
I wrote this poem because social anxiety disorder is a condition that can be really debilitating to live with.

It causes extreme anxiety when going out to a point where you're overly self concious, and people do notice. But you don't want them to notice.

It can make you feel like you're constantly being scrutinised & judged, or seen as 'strange' People may give you ***** looks like as if you're some ******, stare, laugh or say hurtful things, and that affects the person suffering with this condition.

So they end up having an issue with going out, and being social, & then become depressed & feel they can't change, because every time they do make an effort to change or try, society can be quite cruel. That's what makes it difficult.

I think this condition needs to spoken about more, as it's not understood.
leeaaun Dec 2022
they answered
acceptance
will cure your fears
but my question was different
will accepting my fears
will no longer give me
anxiety
or
panic attacks
either way even the situations were
different
they outcome was the same
me drenched in fears
every night
dorian green Jul 2021
sunsets ripple across southern skies
like skipping stones across a pond.
i'm thinking about how we all die.
what will nothing feel like?
what did it feel like before?
i catch myself guessing -
the void and cold conjurings of a
scared temporary consciousness.
loneliness beckons and repulses me
in equal measures, existential inquiries
painting me into nihilistic corners.
is this just some brief gift?
i hem and haw and waste the light,
i become the universe i fear,
endlessly eating my thoughts,
embodying entropy as i gasp for air.
Jenie Oct 2020
I'm telling you that's it, I quit!
A year on now I weigh a ton,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Hotel meals with a book I sit,
a woman on her own must be fun...
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

Day after day sleeping a whit,
puff in the lungs and pulse on the run,
drinking my way out of this pit.

Monday drive bawl or afternoon fit,
abusing I yell before the sun,
I'm telling you that's it, I quit.

A ring and a promise, we almost split,
I never home or seeking to stun,
drinking my way out of this pit.

I will admit I learned a bit.
Of colleagues and business I knew none.
I'm telling you that's it, I quit
drinking my way out of this pit.
My first job, almost 15 years ago, spending the weeks in hotel rooms, flirted on I learned to bring a book. Unable to sleep, stressed out, crying in the car, eating too much, drinking, smoking, I started having panic attacks and quit after a year.
june ivy Aug 2020
Went and got a tattoo just for the needle
See myself out of body, I don't need her
Spinning till morning
Looking at old pics mourning
I don't know why it's happening again
I thought I was done being broken
In and out like the breath from my lungs
Fast heartbeat but not from the drugs
Please, no
Another low
**** me slow
Wilder Aug 2020
Hey
I didn't realize this was
What it's like

Sitting
Next to you
And you're trembling
It's quiet

You know,
Your boyfriend came to get me
Told me in a hushed voice
"[She's] having an anxiety attack"

I paled
I should've researched what to do
But I sat there
Next to you

He handed you a rabbit
I remember you giggled
When it tried to eat your necklace

It was quiet
Soft smiles and trembling
I couldn't help you
I didn't know how to reach you

I didn't know that this
This is what it's like
I've seen this

Quiet
Trembling
Deep gasping breaths for air
That doesn't help

Quiet
Thinking
(I have to go)
(I've had this)
(I had gotten worse)
(Panic attacks)
(Anxiety attacks?)
I feel like sobbing

It's quiet
You smile
We both pet the rabbit
You stop trembling
I don't.
My friend had a really bad anxiety attack recently and I just remember watching her and thinking "if this is really bad, then what are mine?"
B Jun 2020
there’s a rabbit with moon hooded eyes inside of my heart
and every night she looks up to the stars
yearning not to break apart

my rabbit and i feel fine most of the time
but when she starts racing i cry
because my mind believes my existence is a crime

and my heart can’t take it
she thinks she must’ve stopped
so she relentlessly pumps
creating dangerous music; thud thud thud

and look! there goes my rabbit
thrashing around in my war torn lungs
creating chaos in case of catastrophe
because future battles must always be won
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