They say a father helps you see
The kind of person you should be.
A role model, strong and true,
But that's not what I learned from you.
The path you walk, I cannot take,
For my own future's, my own sake.
As husband, father, brother too,
My way must be different from you.
You worked hard, yes, the bills were paid,
You kept your promises, duty-made.
You gave us shelter, provided food,
But missed the heart's essential good.
You failed to build that bridge inside,
Where loving feelings can reside.
Emotionally, we were left dry,
Beneath a cold and empty sky.
So much affection has just flown,
The seeds of caring, left unsown.
The feelings now are hard to find,
Leaving a quiet, weary mind.
An emptiness has taken hold,
A story sadly left untold.
Living together in this place,
It’s hard to find my own space.
The air is thick with disagreement,
Constant arguments, sharp dissent.
I can't change things to feel like mine,
Just toe the ordinary line.
This house is where I live, it's true,
But "home" feels somewhere else, anew.
So anger simmers, soft and low,
And sadness watches, ebb and flow.
Disappointment, a heavy guest,
Puts heart and hope both to the test.
To share a roof, yet be so far,
Beneath a dim and distant star,
Leaves just a hollow sort of ache
For the connection you didn't make.
I am lost
