I sat staring at the wall
No expression upon my face,
As I contemplated the life I lived
And remember that it's just been me,
All alone behind these empty eyes;
No one knows that there's nothing there
Because not a single soul has gazed into
My eyes to see the pain that I am in
And how I am in need of their help
So I wouldn't feel so alone;
This leaves me setting up barriers,
Not wanting anyone to gaze inside;
So I put on a show for everyone;
I think positive thoughts,
Dreaming happy dreams,
Hoping to pay no heed
To the dark reality;
I put on a wide smile
And laugh a loud laugh,
To put on the illusion that
There is not a thing wrong with me;
But I leave a hint that I am in need of help,
It's behind the gates that are my eyes,
The emptiness shows the lie that I live
And the battle that I fight every day;
But no one cares if I need help cuz they're blind;
I put on too good of a show;
Smiled and laugh more than I should have,
Listened and cared more than I had too
I did such a good job that no one
Knows that there's something wrong with me;
I've become consumed by this character
I have created within the confines of my mind;
I don't know where I am in this empty space
And I don't know if I can get out of it
The only thing left to do is the embrace it,
Until it ends the rest of my sanity;
So I must follow the old saying
And keep the show going.
