There’s something wrong with me
I’m broken somewhere inside.
And, I know it won’t be easily fixed
I know because I tried.
I’m all messed up and in pain
And nothing is going right.
I keep on trying to get better
But it’s an uphill fight.

I’m hurting and I want to cry.
I’m depressed and I know why.
I want things to change right now
But, I can’t fix it. I don’t know how.

I keep wishing it was tomorrow
And my heart didn’t hurt so much
For the feel of you in my arms
And the healing of your loving touch.
I’ve healed all I will ever heal
From drowning in my own tears.
But there is something wrong with me
Since you are no longer here.

I’m hurting and I want to cry.
I’m depressed and I know why.
I want things to change right now
But, I can’t fix it. I don’t know how.

There’s something wrong with me
I’m broken somewhere inside.
And, I know it won’t be easily fixed
I know because I tried.
I’m all messed up and in pain
And nothing is going right.
I keep on trying to get better
But it’s an uphill fight.

You and i indulge in a love
So strong no death can violate
And yet
Dusk comes and goes
Along with pieces of our blissful bond

We fell into an abyss of friendship
And gradually got lost in it
Our promises are nolonger as intriguing as the promises of a courtesan
Conversations have become nothing but fleeting pleasantries...

Just like a *** addict drunk on ******,i am desperate....
To ignite our dying flame

I can not lose you

The night is worn thin from this viewpoint. the river
dances still; down the hill, under the rumbling bridge
cluttered with people separate in their own cyclical worlds &
the city glimmers with two thousand diamond fake stars just
beyond the dark tree line. we are watching this world happen
from far away.
We are spectators in a world who has long since
forgotten us.

i say i want to change the world & you say it’s
something good in me. You don’t know what i’m thinking & i
can see it in your eyes when you turn away. Words aren’t as
strong with you.
you want something more from me, something i have never
been able to fully give before. in particular dreams i see
myself exposed. you are the surgeon & i am your patient. your
scalpel cuts through thin skin, inch by inch, careful &
precise. blank sterile walls.
the smell of death & life as
well; it’s contradictory.
my blood too is thin & you wipe it
away with your sleeve. searching for my heart. peeling back
flesh. broken bones & absent heart; i’ve pushed it deep inside.

you say you want more but i wasn’t prepared for this.

**brixtonbell.com

This is difficult to think.
This is difficult to write.
But I've been lying awake,
pondering* this thought at night.

To say I never loved before you-
just doesn't feel right.
Because I am the one
who loves all of life.
I am the one who loves despite-
one's tendency to fight
being loved, or to return love
with only spite


I have accepted myself,
and all things in their respective rights.
What plagues me is more complex;
I am trying to give it light.

I was  in love with you,
but I'm vexed  by this new found sight.
I would never ever risk
complications in the form of fight.
Never not give him my best,
even if I'm showing my selfish side.
And I never loved you
quite like I love him,
I just don't know,
is that alright?

What if I told you
I'm happier than I once was?

What if I told you
Life isn't something we all thought up?

What if I told you
I'd still like to hold you
And give you love that
I never used to have?

Oh darling,
Let's forget I just said that.

There is no cold,
just lack of heat.
You are the sun,
and yet I still shiver.