Let the wind
carry sweet whispers of my love
to you
Let yours echo
Calling back to me
Through the winds of the trees
Bustling
Kisses and ever good wishes
Eternal in my heart
To yours
And back and forth
And back
Until it is in your arms, I reside

I’ve been having nightmares and mostly about you – the you in the future, the one who’s bound to un-love me anyways, regardless of how well our love story turns out. It pains me to have nightmares about those because I know at one point it will become a reality. In those dreams, its always one and the same, the moment where I lose you, the moment where I have to let you go and the moment where I have to give you up because you’re bound for better things and I am just a moment that passed by.

I’ve been trying not to count the moments I have with you but I can’t help it at times. I feel like every day could be the last and I cannot begin to think of when that day comes. I know I’ll never be ready. I know that these dreams will never get me to be prepared for the biggest nightmare, that is, the day that I lose you.

the wet sheets and stale air,
lingering cigarettes, softness of your
rhythmic breath.
your legs in mine, your heels
on my toes, your head nestled in
the contours of my neck.

here is my place of calm:
your body. the clockwork of it,
how, every couple of minutes, you jostle,
and i squeeze you which sends you back still.
how dead the world is
outside of here. the stars are muted next to you.

it’s your unapologetic zealousness,
flaming confidence. you could be naked on a stage
(which you have) and not blink twice.
blatant disregard of opinion,
drop-kicking them away. the world is yours
and you are eating it whole.

you are brighter than this town.
destined for bigger and better things.
flashing your white smile,
you could charm the gods to your will.
i only hope i can keep up, or, rather,
that you let me.

Inside of this lovely white envelope
There is a sweet little secret love note
It's in delicate lace, covered in hope
But two hearts are not to touch, asymptote

Sealed with glitter so love is not bitter
Perfumed with strawberry to stay merry
Words dressed to look pretty, all hearts jitter
Many burdens to carry, stay wary

Yet who gave this letter such powers?
Building love with beauty and elegance
Love's not a tower to fill with flowers
Love is a humble shrine filled with romance

I will show you what love is meant to be
If you would close your eyes and trust in me

How can one attain
The sheer beauty that flows through your veins
The speckles of perfection found within your brain
The blessing everything you touch gains
The mere thought of your allure drives me insane
You've robbed me of my heart, in comparison everyone else is plain

My darling on my mind every day of the week
Show me the inside of your mind, give me a peek
Your thoughts, your eyes, your secrets, all unique
You're the one thing I seek
Giving color to my life, once bleak
My heart stopped the first time I heard you speak

This world is yours, in your hands
All the water, all the sand
All the people residing on the worlds land
All simply your knights, at your command
Giving us hope, the only one who understands

i'm not sure what to do with all the distance
it's been months that have felt like years
i can remember when you came into my life in the winter
and I can remember when you left in the summer
arrival and departure
the distinct difference between the two
i'm only at the thin line of division
the way my emotions don't add up
like miscalculated algebra
all to your advantage
i kept your love letter
the letter where you plagiarized a novel
because i wasn't good enough for your own words
that was my only closure
i wanted desperately to burn the stuffed bears from the carnival
i could only part with one
when i hold it close to me
i feel like how a child would
expecting prizes only in fabric and cotton stuffing
not words of affirmation or love
i almost drove by your house
but i knew i would only go mad thinking
of who has been touching your new furniture that i helped pick out
leaving their fingerprints in place of mine
i miss my t-shirts that you still have
i hope when and if you wear them
you can feel me close
my heart beating where yours is
sometimes i feel like i miss you enough for you to show up
as if my pain could teleport
the craving of a complete closure
one where i don't need liquor or a lighter
others bring up your name
as if i'm not in the process of misplacing the letters
or dismissing the syllables
i've been trying to forget your face
your face of sharp bones
flaring nostrils
and nostalgic lips

i've been trying to imagine if that night would have never happened
when that veteran couldn't take himself anymore
he chose you to be his last interaction
it was all in hints
he was screaming for help without making a sound
how were we supposed to know
i still wonder where that blue jay is that he buried behind the building
i just couldn't bare to see it
now i wish i made a map
X marks the spot where our love died
i remember when you had to bury your own blue jay
you never saw it coming
you took the wrong step and it was under your foot
just like he said his bluejay was
fidgeting and fighting for life
i'd like to think it was a sign from him
to let you know it's possible to move on and forward
so you did
you moved on to scabbed skin and worn-out lungs
i moved on to scholarly headaches and false pretenses
back then i could never fathom my days without you
now i find it difficult to recall how we were
it feels like our romance was a dream
because it only felt real when i was asleep

I love to close my eyes
& find a stillness –
in the turning world.

My imagination wanders,
to you.
My memories make
Pleasure.

~ Ephemeral bliss  ~
Peaking in the swells gentle set.
Mid-solitudes of the vast Pacific.

Young honey lip lovers

Warmth in wintertide;
a wild iteration of summer.

Mio Amore
My sunshine in the shadow.