A captive is what I think I shall be,
for Halloween this year—in 2023.
Burdened by the weight of other’s fear.
Trapped.
Sitting silenced in a cage full of expectations.
And rage.

Confined, bound.
No one around.

Who if not I, can release this relentless pressure?
Hopelessly, I await for the right partner—
To take my hand, help me stand.
And get my **** together.

To walk with me, out of captivity.
The place that haunts me.
How long must my sentence be?

Oh, how I yearn to be set free.
Take this wretched costume off.
Just. Be. Me.

Underneath it all,
I am a strong and capable woman.
I can walk out of this on my own!
Saunter about, like royalty
Onward to the throne.

Amen, I am captive no more.
For I chose the latter path,
After all, it suits me most admirably.

It is at my core, a crown can be found.
Seek and you shall see,
an exquisite Queen, standing her ground.
Not just on Halloween, but in actual reality.

Do you know what it's like to be inside someone's head?
All of a sudden wanting to be dead.
Or maybe full of worry?
Rushing 'round in a hurry.
Maybe full of rage?
Being life's prisoner in its cage.

You can't hide from me.
That's just how it is unfortunately.
Standing in a room just me and you
I'll always know how you feel, it's true
cause being an empath is not a choice
but a chance to give all the hurting a voice.

For what am I but a man,
Alone I walk, alone I stand,
My mind; the only place where life ain't so bad,
What I can't do down here- up there I can.

And what am I but a fickle flower?
The echoes of silence that get louder and louder,
As I gaze upon my broken life from a tall castle tower,
As the fruits that grew my consciousness turn a bitter wicked sour.

What am I but an unloved creature?
Not a shard of perfection in any of my features,
Although I am dead and numb inside,
I've still God's spine to hide behind.

Hope is not something that one can find,
It's in your soul; it's in your mind,
I fight the evil; my inner inside,
I thought I'd won- but now we're tied.

The building is breaking,
the cameras aren’t recording,
and I’m supposed to do my job effectively?

The world is dying,
the economy collapsing,
the people falling in the street,
and I’m supposed to find a way to be happy?

The bills are unpaid,
the lights won’t turn on,
the water is brown and smells of syrup,
and I’m supposed to care about your new skin line?

Our minds are poisoned
with deception and false information,
kept distracted by flashing lights and one-liners once funny.
Our youth is gone before its start.
Our elders work until their final breath.
The children are crying, screaming, pleading for peace,
yet they know too that it’s too late.
And we’re supposed to count the blessings gone unseen?

I am alive,
but what does that even mean?
All I can do is breath,
and hope the smoke doesn’t destroy me.
I have a safe home,
if you ignore the lead and asbestos.
I have a good partner,
if you ignore all of the screaming.

I looked to my neighbour,
and saw their lawn had no grass either.
We looked across the street together, hoping for new sights.
But aside from the blood and the bullet holes
the people there had the same troubles.
We broke down in tears.
We heard the cries for help,
but were too busy fighting ourselves.
Another life gone,
unprevented by healthcare that doesn’t care.

The news lady spoke of another shooting today.
They showed the children hitting the windows
and asked one fleeing to speak of his dead friend.
They mentioned the staff member killed
while calling the police.
A parent was arrested trying to rush in.
They could have been saved,
but better to ‘keep the public calm’.
919 dead overall.

But still,
they want us to smile
and pretend to be happy
in what is supposedly the ‘greatest country’;
kept alive solely by those willing to give their lives
for what they consider to be a good fight.
We’re meant to never complain
for the sake of modesty and good names.
Meanwhile, 80-year-old men are arguing
over who gets to decide our fate.
God bless America,
and all the dead people living in it.
Prayers for those permanently lost to it.