….
….
And it was real.

(Why?)

….I was missing.
I hear I was missing.
(You left the world you knew for me.)

Was it that easy?
….can't be real.
The way we grew….

I hear I was missing.
….I was missing.
(I needed your affection and your love.)

What did I do?
(Why did you leave?)
I wasn't ready for….

I shouldn't have promised…
(….I would have said yes.)
….asked for your hand.

You were a casualty...
(I need true emotion.)
Of my insecurity.
(….many ups and downs.
Why did you come here….?)

I was missing.
I hear I went missing.
(You went back to the world you knew.)
Now I can't sleep….

(Yes, it was real.)
And I never knew…
(You went missing.
...you were missing.)
I hate emotions.

Please….don't close it.
(….out of my driveway.
So many nights I cried…)

I hear I was missing.
I'm here, I'm not missing.
(He gives me affection and his love.)
….but this is real.
(It was….but no more….)

(He said we'll be married.
….we'll get married.)
I need you….I'm sorry...I left.
(Why….scared?)
I wasn't  real
And I never knew it.
….
….
….
(Now I can sleep.)
….
….

I can't remember
What I did today
Did I talk to you?
What did I say?

My mind is fragmented
anxiety high
I couldn't breath
I thought I was going to die

A foggy memory
Body in pain
Muscles tightening
A struggle in vain

My mind is fragmented
Not much to see
As I lay there shaking
Please, don't leave me

An empty mind
As the aftermath starts to unfold
Weak and shaking
My body not doing as it's told

My mind is fragmented
Medications high
Forget to take it once, oops
I hope one day, it won't be goodbye

and in that brief moment of eternity i swear i belonged to you; each fragmented pixel of my being held together by the fragility of your touch