I've had enough stupid games,
enough of your ******* lullabies
to sing me to sleep
when you know I lay awake staring
at my ceiling wondering
whether or not I should say '**** it'
and throw my life away,
or to say 'oh well' and suffer through
another miserable ******* day
where I have to see your face and know
that behind that smile
is a mother who
cares more for her cigarettes
than her daughters.

So no-
I'm not lending you another cent for your satisfaction.
I'm not going to nod my head along to your half-baked opinions.
I'm not going to let you walk through my life,
ruining every precious thing I have left.

because the secondhand smoke has already destroyed my body,
your words have already destroyed my mind.
I won't let the shattered pieces be picked up and swallowed like the pills that you love shoving down your ashen throat.

The Lady Grace smiles down at me.
It's loving smile like no other
Brighter than stars and sun's
Beaming rays upon a child's face
As I smile back.
The smile of the lady grace lights my world.
Lady Grace lights her cigarette.

The Lady Grace smiles at me.
It's a loving smile like no other
Brighter than stars and sun's
Beaming upon her proud grandsons face
As I beam back.
I'm making strides in the world.
And she strides with me.
At her own pace.
The beam of the lady grace lights my world.
Lady Grace lights her cigarette.

The Lady Grace opened her eyes
She dragged herself off her side and propped herself up with her arm
She gasped for air.
She trained her eyes on me
Desperate and loving
Wishing to speak.
I look back.
Glazed to her pain.
She searches through.
I'm here for her.
Lady Grace lights her cigarette.

My eyes squint on the doorframe.
I drag myself to consciousness from dreams.
'your grandma is dead'.

Lady Grace left me today.
Her love and guidance vanished in the wind.
I light a cigarette.
And cry.

it's 3am in the morning,
look at you, you're right by my side
in this unknown place
20 miles from home.

we're alone together at backyard
its 60F outside
it's cold, but you keep me warm
your hug and smile keep me warm

cigarettes in our mouth
smoke in our lungs
laughing with no reasons
you made me feel like i'm the luckiest

sitting on the couch,
with your brother next room
we sing, tell jokes
until our laugh turned into a kiss

we kiss in the cold, slowly
the taste of sweet cigarettes
and our eyes closed
we looked into the mirror,
"we look good together"

until the morning comes,
we looked into each other eyes
i thought i love you,
and you did too.
but were not

we admit we want each other
we want to stay close
but were to afraid to leave or lose each other
after all were just teenagers,
who needs accompany

Did you smoke a cigarette?
No darling, why would I ever do that?

cravings as follows:
whiskey, cigarettes, and you.
how long will it take?

All she has is the hollow shadow of an ex-lover
And all that bring her joy are cigarettes and retro city pop records

Like flirting with a cigarette, studying it
teasing it between these slender fingers.
Turning it this way
that way
and putting it out after one
measly puff.
You know, before the cancer seeps in
like that.