In the mirror through tears, i notice that i am dressed in the scars of every deep wound I played off like a paper cut, and the phone in my pocket weighs a thousand pounds from your text messages.

I want to skip the ******* thing in a river.

Oil and water but just as much as I know we won’t ever mix, you convince me it’s all part of the recipe.

I have shrank down, cut pieces of myself like a cake and served everyone at every table a slice every time.

Stuffed my baggage in the closet and let you move yours in instead.

Cried like an anxious dog who’s owner wasn’t around.

And we called this pain love, for 20 years.

I slipped into the role, thanks to my parents.

Mentally ill and emotionally unaware,
It’s so easy to choose what’s easy and so hard to notice your love has gone rotten.

I changed my perspective and every smooth word started to sting.

I was kind as you were building up pieces of me to fuel your own fire.

I understood until I couldn’t anymore, but you never would.

Change your perspective with me, climb the mountain and realize the hike’s easier on the way down, i would’ve carried you all the way up if you asked me. But we sat for 20 years and heard everybody on the way back down talk about the view.

I chose to sit with you instead. And when I finally took that first step up, I should’ve known it meant leaving you behind me.

I am my own destiny. I am the bullet in the chamber and the consequences of the trigger pull. I am my own mind, I tended the garden of fear and worry and constant replay of mistakes and regret. I am more than who I think I should be for anyone else.


good luck with all the **** you’ve got going on. disrespectfully yours, your ex “best friend”

You are my last 7 minutes.
And for some who don’t understand
It is the brain that portrays your best memories
Most care-free moments in life
When once you were unashamed of your smile
The times your stress was to fly away,
Your mind plays back to those times
Like
a record player on Rewind.
So, when I say that you are my last 7 minutes
I mean
You are the broken record player that repeats in me
And when someone wants to take that away
I will stand between them and you
Because you hold
my most carefree moments
my joyous of times
my life,
You are my
Last 7 minutes.

Since we last spoke things have changed alot
She's becoming more of a fighter
Her strength grows wilder
Her eyes get bigger
Her smile wider
Her hair glows brighter
Her attitude is different than before
Her life is too
But she's brave
She's got no fear
She got the dream team
She got everything she needs
All she needs now is to see through my eyes
See this poem as true
So dear chloe the only one beautiful in a gown this is for you

Wipe those ***** on your mouth.
Bitter people will always be entitled.
Envy, that's what you feel right now.
The worst is you keep eating it all.
How fool are you?

And to you my friend,
You always idolise your best of friends.
Aren't you worried about something you don't know?
The rope you keep pulling on is the one who cut you slowly.
Do you think you deserve it?
Well, Indeed!
You deserve what you tolerated my friend.

Ohh! Look at those best of friends.
The one is pulling her up while the other one is cutting her down.
How shameful are they?
Ahhh! I really enjoyed their fake laughs.
It makes me shivered!
How fool are they?

© Unatnat03

How can it be that life should be so sweet
What could I've done to earn this greatest gift
That I should have this rarest chance to meet
A soul so kind, who opens up her heart.
Their arms forever opened to embrace
Their words forever ready to uplift
Even her home, that sanctuaried place
Left open-doored to friends who go adrift.
Their voice they raise to advocate for change
To validate, they spread not hate, but love
She lives her life without a trace of shame
She must have been a gift sent from above.
No words I speak nor write could manifest
A friend like her; she really is the best.

friends
will be quick to show you
just how much they don't care
when you need a hand on your shoulder
or someone to have your back
just watch how they quickly disappear
like a mirage in the desert heat
it's an illusion
they're cardboard cutouts
the truth is
they were never really there in the first place
so you can't blame them for being
fake

Blackbirds backwards
and your solid foil to my boiling yawn
is remembered

I’ll always love you my dude

even though it’s mostly memory now
we travelled odd eighties early nineties
hinterlands
full of clear stupidities and hidden
immutable truths

but I’ll always hold
ridiculous dry heated cricket pitches,
run dark *** and loose joints
as what drove us

“What should we do today?”
“I dunno”

I'll never forget when
we were so young,
you lived next door
& we did everything together.

I'll never forget
that time I came over for your
birthday party
& we accidentally locked ourselves in the bathroom,
crying & screaming on the floor
because the handle broke off
and we thought we would never be found.

I'll never forget
when we were sent outside
of the classroom because we talked
to each other too much.
We sat on the side walk
in silence.

Staring at a crushed, sticky candy apple
glowing bright artificial red in the beaming sun on the pavement
leftover from last night's
school carnival.

I'll never forget
how we could play outside
A L L   day long
until the sun went to sleep
and we smelled of freshly cut grass
with wild flowers behind our ears.

The way we would
swing so high until the tips of our toes
would touch the leaves at the top of
the trees above.

And we'd laugh nervously
when we swung back down
as our stomachs would release
a kaleidoscope of butterflies.

I still remember...

And I still smile...