Nostalgic is the place!

The smell of burnt hair
The rumbling silence
The carpeted floor
The taste of dust
The furniture, all in plum

It is the forgotten place!**

Where she used to write
Where she used to weep
Where they revealed their cores
And where they uttered their goodbyes

Quickly sketching paths in fresh snow when there was no smooth path etched in stone
Sickly I'm sliding with wet shoes on a slippery *****
Whiskey is my only lullaby
Let go of hope the ashen past
You cannot escape your lonely fate
In my fist clenched a ****** t shirt inscribed my aspirations and my apathy
My sullen sleep ridden dreams echoing with such painful screams
I sit feverishly take a dram just one last sip before I slip
Still quietly curdling in the corner when the sun came out
When the flowers did bloom blossoming a sweetened sappy odor
Where can you say lays the man who's hand beholds the golden cup
In the dark forgotten plains
Tending to lambs and pillowy sheep
All the while the wind withered a beast whom the world denied him sleep

I need to write a happy song
Something to break through this
Grey fog of emotion
This putrid state of
"Meh"
This perpetual cycle of internal mental apathy
After all

Complacency kills.

I can no longer sit
and write
with ease

The stories of fear
were so alluring
I could read them
for eternity

But now they're nothing but
a tedious
chore

Reading in general
is
hard

The words lull me to sleep
and the story makes no
sense
at all

My dreams
have melted away
into a corner of my mind
that I don't dare

                                                           ­                                             touch

Nothing is exciting
Nothing brings me
smiles

I can feel the part of myself
that I was so sure of
slipping
through my fingers

Being torn away
by the cruel grasp
of
of


                                                   ­                                                  of what?


I
I don't know
but I desperately hold
whats left
with an iron grip

And I fear if I look
at what I have saved
Ill find a handful of


                                                            ­                                          Nothing

If I could cut open my heart
And have it pour your blood
Would that make you more a part of me
Than the possession of all my love?

Reach inside your chest
And pull out anything but apathy,
So I can see you give
Something tangible back to me.

Rid my body of your toxins,
Sweat you out through every pore.
Until only the sweet salt is left
On my skin,
As it was before.

And maybe it's okay
To still say those three words.
As long as they taste like vinegar
Instead of feeling like a prayer
As they roll off your tongue
Into the always silent air.

"just try not to give a ****."

I try and I try and I ******* try.
But all I do is give a ****.
I care so ******* much that it claws up my throat until it feels like I can't breathe.
I care about anything that goes through your stupid ******* head, even now, when I know you could give a ****.
I don't want to anymore.
I don't want to want you anymore.
Your apathy drowns me.

Laws of physics state that all bonds will eventually be broken
Worn down, ripped apart,
Converted to something new
But if you're determined,
Maybe you'll be able to salvage what's left
You didn't hold on tight enough
To what was left of us
And yet you're so surprised
That I, too, faded into the gentle folds
Of your memories,
Changed

Gravity come back
Or leave me suspended
Masks and mirrors
Images defaced
Replace the smile under the sun
I want star light
Transcended
Or just leave it somewhere
Aside
Reflection has gone away
Just don't vanish
While there's still tension
Don't pull it back
Stay
If only until the morning light
My apathy

A child starves
Thin little arms
And they say
Not my problem.

A black man dies
Fear in his eyes
And they say
Not my problem.

A woman is terrified
To walk down the street at night
And they say
Not
my
problem.

I don’t understand it
How blind can you be?
Even though it’s hidden
It’s still a reality.

We have to educate
Only then can we celebrate
The destruction of hate
and the changing of our fate.

Our world won’t be successful
‘Til all that’s bad is gone
In the meantime, we’re regretful
No one knows what’s going on.