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I'm probably not going to **** myself.
lose myself into the void.
fall asleep in silence
in my eyes emotions devoid.
I'll just take a bunch of pills or cut my pretty wrists
distract myself from the sirens and ball them into fists.
im probably not gonna **** myself
theres not enough reason to
no one who can help me
nothing at all

i know ill upset someone
i know people would be mad
but this overwhelming sadness
this numbness
this emptiness

the voices getting louder
the people screaming in my ears
the stupid stupid noise

i know i wont.
im too scared.
i dont want to die.
i just want to feel again
im so tired
yellow is bubbly
sour and tasty
yellow is bright
yellow truthful

yellow is *****
yellow is oily
yellow is lonely

yellow is unfortunate
"if you want to make it in the world
take your shot
aim high
hit the target
don't miss your shot holly"

I have missed my shot granddad.
if only you'd known who I really was.
you probably would've hated me,
words my granddad repeated to me over and over as a kid
red is the blood that pours down his arms
red is the flush on her cheeks
red is the flower that they wear on their charms
red stains my carpet for weeks

wine and women
power hungry; driven
red controls life.

red is the heart
hurting the boy
pumping too hard and fast

red is the truck
that took them away
the world speeding past

red is hungry
red is power
red is strong.
im doing color poems every day im grounded.
hope you like them, cuz this hurt.
Zywa Feb 17
In ashen wisps clouds

are moving across the sky --


Far away: the moon.
Composition "Moon Viewing Music" (2018, Peter Garland), for three gongs, part 2 "Even more so / because of being alone / the moon is a friend" (haiku by Yosa (Taniguchi) Buson, 1716-1783, translated by Yuki Sawa and Edith Marcombe Shiffert), performed in the Organpark on four gongs by Pepe Garcia on February 8th, 2025

Collection "org anp ARK" #86
DJQuill Feb 16
A payphone,
Paid for with time and energy
All my change I spend on you
Released from the caller's heart
An already safed contact,
Feeling like an anonymous number,
Ignored like spammers
"Call me back" left on voicemail
Hanging loose from the box
Still waiting-
more days to come
i lost a friend today.
not to death.
almost to death.
i called the police as they attempted.
they have stopped talking to me.
they are angry

i lost a friend today
i wish i had done better.
they almost left.
without a word.
i wish they hadnt told me.

i lost a friend today.
my friend attempted suicide today and i called the police. they told me to ******* and die.
i want to hurt.
Vianne Lior Feb 16
The door yawns open—
its hinges groan like old bones.
Dust blooms in the light,
a ghost of every footstep
that once passed through.

The walls inhale,
exhaling the scent of old wood,
something sour, something lost.
Wallpaper peels like dead skin,
exposing the raw ribs of the house.

In the kitchen, the table waits,
a chair slightly askew—
as if someone had just left,
as if they might return.

A single cup, cracked,
lingers in the sink,
stained with ghosts of coffee,
lips that once pressed its rim.

The stairs creak beneath my weight—
not in protest,
but in recognition.
They know me.
They remember.

Upstairs, the air thickens,
choked with the weight of silence.
A door stands half-open,
swollen with time,
holding its echoes close.

The bed is made,
but the sheets lie stiff with dust.
A shirt drapes over the chair,
sleeves limp, reaching—
but for no one.

I reach out, fingers grazing glass—
a shadow stirs in the corner of my eye,
but when I turn, nothing waits for me.
Only absence.
Only the house, patient, watching.

I swallow,
but the house does not.
It keeps everything.
It keeps them.

I turn to leave—
but the walls hold their breath.
They know.
I will come back.

I always do.

itsmekacey Feb 16
i am all alone
please don't lie and say
i am loved
because that's simply not true
life is pointless
why would you ever say
there's hope for me

(now read bottom up)
we used to walk downtown
close to Christmas
you would be stoic and quiet
I would get excited over anything we saw

you wrote poems about me
you told me the most wonderful stories
I always listened
when you called me your little Sunlet

I loved you
I still do

to love a poet is not the same as to be loved by a poet.
to be loved
is so much more fulfilling
I loved you

moon

-L
to my sweet moonbeam
you are loved
you are missed
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