When I miss you, I miss too much
I miss who I am when I’m with you
I miss what you make me feel
I miss how loved I felt
How the feelings of love never went away
When I was with you

When I love you, I love you deeply
With the love only a mother loves with
The way a loved one loves another
The love that couldn’t be found anywhere else
The love I won’t allow you to never escape from
When I was with you

When I held you, I held you tightly
I held the fond memories we had
Tighter than the grip around your neck
When I expressed my love for you
Tighter than our passion filled nights
Of forcing myself inside of you
When I was with you

When I hit you, I hit hard
With the affection I’ve always had for you
As if the bruises on your face
Don’t remind you of me
And all the moments we shared
And every waking hour you live
You’ll never forget the times
When I was with you

A pile of SECRETS and LIES and you call it love.
Your life is passing you by.
You're frozen in time.
You're holding your breath.
You're a statue waiting for something that's NEVER going to happen.
Yet you call it love.
It's NOT love.

Our love was fruitful
But so rotten
Far from an Adam and Eve's story
We both knew what were doing
When we were in the sheets
We both had it all and gave it up for nothing
Lust in the air every time we connect a stare
Hyatt knew us well.
Hyatt knew us well.

I thought having this done would change me. But, all I have understood now is that I made a scar to myself, a scar that would always remind me that I was so deeply into someone and it was gone. I thought it would make a change in my life, a new beginning. Instead, I would always be reminded of what happened because of this. Thus, this would always be a part of my story, a story to be told to someone who would accept me and would wait for me whatever it takes to be by my side.

The Affair

I fell in love with childhood,
he wore a red cape
made of polyester plaid,
tiny stitches of lines
circulated around his palm.
He never wore a mask,
his memories wore enough of one,
a fog remnant of a dream,
his home he’d never see again
all along the river, led up to a lake.
It didn’t matter anyway,
a wedge upon two brick walls
was a plaque – or a warning –
a memorial, perhaps, but
all succumbed to his pain,
every inch crumbled to dust.  
That’s when I took his childhood away.
I fell in love with memories.

Beside my wilted body,
lie,
Whisper you could love me,
still,
Pull your tired bones from,
mine,
Dress up your unsettled,
heart,

Leave me here alone,
again,
Tell me you'll be back once,
more,
Did you tell yourself,
why,
I give you what she,  
can't,

Leave me here again,
It happens,
So many times.

~LC~