It was dark,
I couldn't see,
The light wasn't reaching me.
I was scared,
And I couldn't breathe,
I didn't have what I need.

But as I looked in the cupboards, for that box of who knows what,
A glimmer of hope hit me, I remembered, and I stopped.

I walked out, up to my room,
I lay in my bed, not sure what to do.
I thought about the moment, a month or so ago,
When you enjoyed talking to me, smiled and gave me hope.

All that was last summer,
In the depths of my despair,
And one day this summer,
I remembered being there,
Looking through the cupboards,
For the worst, finally prepared,
And I remembered not doing the right thing,
Because I was always too scared,
To say these words to you,
And strip my torn soul bare.

Thank you,
For giving me your time,
For accepting me for who I am,
And giving me one more shot.

Thank you,
For risking all you have,
On giving me a chance,
To give you something back.

the fabric of reality
rests on the idea that
everything is nothing
and nothing is
what I've been
yearning for

interstellar or interstitial
irregular and irradiant

never too late
always significant
sometimes terrifying

just say yes

Process and Purge
a radical transformation
is upon us
open your Heart and
your Mind will follow

one day this body
will be a corpse
and that doesn't
frighten me
in the slightest

ordinary anxieties
lose their authority
and I am Alive
at last

I used to believe everything happened for a reason,
But it's hard to see the reason for this.
It's hard to breathe
In this ocean you left me.
It's hard to see
Through this darkness you led me.
It's hard to feel anything
But this hole that you gave me
And the thoughts that burn
Even when I don't think of you.

Because everything reminds me of you.
I was feeling better
Until I saw your cigarettes in my trash can.
I was feeling better
Until I found your shirt under my bed.
I was feeling better
Until I realized
That this is all *******
And that I ******* need you.

No matter what I've been told I can't shake you.
That I'm strong-
It's because you made me strong-
And that I need to find myself
But I don't because I found myself with you.

Being in love is amazing, because you feel the connection in every way:
Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically.
Being in love is terrifying, because you feel the pain in every single way:
Mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically.
Something so good
Has to have a bad side;
It's just the way the world was made.

I don't know how three days
Can burn my future down to nothing.
I don't know how one second
Can set me back a lifetime.

But I will be fine,
Eventually.
If I lived 18 years without you,
I can survive the rest.
At least,
That's what I keep telling myself.

wind whistles through
the hollows of trees' tranquil
leaves and the silence cracks
against the coffin being shut
and i cry till my eyes
can sob no more

I've lived a life without emotion
Repressed feelings and thoughts
But nothing can hold so tightly to anger
As my whitened knuckles can,
absolutely desperate to not let go.

I once knew a girl named Mary
With long blonde curls and dark brown eyes
She knows the depths of me that no one reaches
I wonder if she can remember me,

and I wonder if she writes

It started with a phone call.

Sweat drips down my forehead
my mind is jumbled
my
pulse races
irr  e  gu  l  a  rl  y
and my heart is
its competitor.

The room feels smaller
and the faces around me
b
l
u
r
into nothing.

What is happening?
Why can’t I breathe?

I can’t stand up right,
my palms too sweaty
to grasp
the
nearest
surface.

It started with a phone call,
and it ended with a hard
crash
to the floor.