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Rhianecdote Dec 2014
"You need to step into the real world. You're living a fantasy"


Sorry Ma but that life's not for me.  

                                          So I'll just sit slack

                       And kick back to

My own zone of **reality
Cause it's all relative any way right? All a matter of perspective
Rhianecdote Dec 2014
I'm sorry that you think
I opened my legs
and closed my mind to you.
I'm sorry that
that was partly true
because my feelings
I no longer knew
how to speak to you,
But I hoped I could show you,
Through my body,
through acting as
release for you.
Even though I knew
freedom in another way
is what you'd choose...
From me...to you
I'm sorry that every time
you slipped into me
I slipped a little further
away from you.
And that when I cried
that night unexpectedly,
wasn't because that intimacy
was overwhelming,
it was the distance
I felt in that closest
of moments,
first time I
experienced lonely.
And I'm sorry
cause this was not
what I had planned.
But most of all I'm sorry
that I couldn't
make you understand
all I really wanted was to
hold your hand .



*And now as we Part I Wonder Who will Restart this Handheld Heart?
Rhianecdote Dec 2014
For the longest time I have avoided everything and anything that could potentially cause me stress or heartache. I have forfeited all of my potential in this pursuit. Wound my way around every which way, detour and diversion in a futile attempt to defer the inevitable and now I find myself at a dead end; without a friend.
Diverted my attention to ease any tension, but the constant detour, the long way round leaves a man weary; weary in waiting. Increasing the tension, the anxiety and the depression. Decreasing the fun, the happiness, the opportunity to be content! Because it's not a con, not really. It's a state that I could cross into absent of barriers if they weren't of my own making. No AK's line those gates, no watchful eyes or suspicious minds. Just an imagination creating a nation in its own image ; MY OWN MARRED IMAGINATION perceiving shadows as threats. But shadows they are and shadows they remain, shadows that grow in size and engulf me as I run further and further away. But shadows are only casts of the man; they do not exist without the being. Shadows have been cast but shadows may also be cast out; they are nothing without their maker.
Written over a year ago during a time where great change was needed in my life and I'm glad to say that for the most part I have stuck to such sentiments and it's made all the difference in life. A lot of us are scared of change but  it's important to remember that it is one of the constants in life and as long as that is the case there is always a chance that things will change in your favour.

Its simple maths *******!

Probability ftw! :)
Rhianecdote Dec 2014
So I'll give you time
As I stop the clock on me.
Afford you minutes
As my FUNds deplete
May be broke
But I'll wave the fee,
Cause I'm a fool you see.
Embracing the fall
Of this fallacy.
Cause I do this
all in the knowing
that our times up really
And you're about
to say goodbye to me.
Those ones where you wrote something years ago but it eerily applies to the present . Romance on Repeat.
  Dec 2014 Rhianecdote
Jeremy Bean
Its time to brush the dust off
from the past that we both built
It never had a future
and our present fate is sealed
Too many empty seconds
Too many hollow hours
Watering a seedling
which was never meant to flower
Too many months of madness
Too many yearning years
Too few smiles shared
Too many lonesome tears
Rhianecdote Dec 2014
Haven't been myself for a while now,
Adopted a new identity,
Inhibited another role far removed from what you see, saw...

Shadow strayed far from its maker,
Ship that's been long lost at sea,
Line up of all shapes and sizes
All professing to be me.
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