When we hugged
I never asked you
To check my back
For stab wounds
But I'm thankful
That you did
And now you've gone
And left me with
The same scars

On times like this
He was the one
Who used to hold
Your hand amid
The busy streets

He was the one
Who touched you like
A cup of tea
Pressed on your skin
When times got rough

He cuddled with you
As the rain dropped
On your window pane
While you listened to vinyls
On repeat

He used to write you poems
On benches at parks
As he stared at your eyes
And watched people come and go

Someday, he said
I can’t love you anymore
You thought he was joking
But the bitter truth
Was that- he was not

You fell for him more
As the day passed
You soon realized
That you loved him
More than ever

On nights that felt
Like no one is awake
You let your souls out
While dancing along
Silly pop songs

He used to carry your bags
So you can shop
And bought you roses
When you overthink
A lot

He would come over
For he was used to
Being awake at 3am
To listen to all
That bothers you

14th of February
He took you out on a
Fun fair and made you
Laugh as if he
Had already stole your heart

He was sweet
You were quirky
In that sudden moment
Everything was
So beautiful


It was until you lost him



You never learned
How sad
It is walking
Down the road
All alone

You never learned
How it is to keep
All your problems
To yourself
With no one to listen

You’d bring out
The poems he
Had written you
Realizing how much he
Has loved you

As you sit beside his grave
Like any other Saturday
Talking to him
As if he was still alive

Where nights like this
You would like to
Sleep in his arms
Listening to the beat
Of his heart

But the pain is still there
Knowing that even if he
Knew he was dying
He still kept
On loving you

Because you'd rather
Watch sunsets
With him
Than mourning
For his death

-j.t

Yesterday, I went out to a party
for the first time since we broke up.
And I saw you,
with your tongue down someone else's throat.
I spent the night drowning myself in cheap beer
and falling into beds of strangers that smelt
of regret and forgotten memories
of the people we once loved.

I drove home at dawn,
the road lines swerving and dipping,
and I never saw that truck coming.
The pain was blinding
and as my chest hit the steering wheel,
my lungs collapsing and heart bursting,
I thought of the first time you kissed me.

Tender and sweet,
it felt like my heart was exploding.
Ironic, isn't it?
How death,
and falling in love
feel the same?

"It's better to burn out than to fade away."

*This is my way of burning out.

capricorn: someday you'll wake up and the sun will be reaching down your throat saying her batteries ran out and she needs to borrow yours
aquarius: someday you'll realize that a hurricane without an eye isn't worth it and i hope that's today
pisces: someday your mom will give you a life altering piece of advice and you'll sit for a minute and then disregard the entire thing
aries: someday you'll bite your tongue and someone else will scream in pain, you'll look at him and someone else will fall in love, congrats
taurus: someday you'll be the reason they whisper "love hurts just like morning coffee" in the hallways
gemini: someday the government will have made laws prohibiting certain behaviors, and all because of you
cancer: someday someone will grab your hands and tell you that they love you and yes, you should probably abandon hopes of being decent now
leo: someday you'll make the conscious decision to love someone and then wonder why it didn't work like you thought it would
virgo: someday you'll meet someone who you talk about sunsets and road trips and being the human embodiment of a storm with; love them hard
libra: someday you'll abandon taking photos of the sky and you'll later find yourself tasting colors in the back of your throat
scorpio: someday you'll get a coffee and give your name and the barista will write "very sad looking girl that looks like a walking orchid"
sagittarius**: someday the sun will stop asking for your half of the rent

Blue is my favorite color
I seem to wear it best
When I'm missing you