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Cant you see
After all this time
That its you I've been in love with...
Always.
Can I just ******* bury my head in the sand?
Go out and cry in the rain?
Stay until I or the world passes by
And washes away all the pain?
Could I just ******* belong to this world of ours
Without changing my soul?
There's nowhere for me,
I'm dying to see.
Frankly I'm out of control.
Short poem-might add more possibly.
The Sun had an arrow
That could pierce through the Moon, but,
Withdrawn, disintegrated
     Into stars.

And such is our love—
A close one, a closing one,
A consolation,
An exchange
     Of well-wishes.*

© 2015 J.S.P.
Draft.
Wake at sunrise happy
to only want to die by sundown.

One moment enjoying life then wishing the next
to exchange it for death.

Seething with anger then shaking with anxiety
and a burst of depression,
All in one ******* day?

Strong to helpless
in the blink of an eye?

Internal debates on whether
to seek help

Or clamp a hand over
my own **** mouth.


*I need stability. I can't live like this.

You're just being dramatic. **** it up.
Wrote this early last winter

Things are better now.
f
   a
l
    l
i
  n
g

d
o
w
n

the rabbit

   o   l   e
h             h
o             e
l              l
  e   h   o
embedded in the most tenebrous corner of my mind,
harlequin memories of serendipity,
dripping like bittersweet wine,
tantalize me,
begriming what was once an unsoiled canvas.

engulfed in my despondency,
I repose homely
until my mind's taste-buds
savor the saccharine flavors
of its own derisive thoughts.

aroused to say the least,
my mind's libido is now being satisfied.
I lie here,
welcoming all that my thoughts and epiphanies have to offer.
I am unable to disclose what's bestowed to me
but that's irrelevant.

My mind is here...
and open
and anticipating
the pleasing rush
of these thoughts that venture through my head.

The pleasure is overwhelming,
forcing my chakras open
as my ajna awakens from its long slumber.

I crave this foreplay
and I plead with the universe
to make it never-ending
but it seems my cries fall upon deaf ears
and I'm left open-minded
and unfinished.
If you don't understand, you can ask me.
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