People often ask me what love is  

And I seriously don't know what it means

All I can think about is you

Your eyes, those brown eyes

Those eyes which saw me naked  

You saw every scar on my body  

Yet the only thing you said was

“You are beautiful”  

Love, I am not beautiful

Scars, stretch marks, blood, wounds

Doesn't mean beautiful

I am not an art

Yet your lips kissed me

The way the sun kissed my skin every morning

Without a fail, without any doubt

You smiled.  

And the only words that came to my mind was

"****, this is trouble"

My love, your words hold me like a hostage

Trapped inside an empty box, finding a way out.  

A way I can never ever get a glimpse of.

I knew that this love

Our love would last a lifetime  

Or so I thought



We were torn apart by hatreds, insecurities, confusions

Maybe if it wasn't for distance  

We would be still together, we could have worked it out

But maybe, no matter what decisions we'll make

We will still come to an end

Confused about the future

Insecure about other people

Hating each other

You, giving up

And me, craving for more

Craving for something that can fill up the hole inside my chest



I wanted you to stay forever, here beside me

But every time I would ask about it

You always said

"You deserve so much more"

You were once my everything

My other half

My partner in crime  

You were someone so freaking important to me

You were the kind of mistake, I wouldn't mind repeating

I fell so hard for you

And guess what happened?

Love, I am broken



How many days, months, years

For me, to forget

That once upon a time

You were here

I was there

Hands holding tighter

Eyes locked to each other

Hearts that beat in a synchronizing manner  



How much would it cost?

For the pain to stop

For the memories to abandon

For the feelings to fade

My love, I did not expect any of this

I didn't know that love can be deadly

A love that can force someone to commit suicide  

That loving someone means tearing every part of yourself





Now, do you think I'm suicidal?

Love, do not be afraid

I'm not going to die

Being suicidal doesn’t mean killing yourself

Suicidal means I wouldn't mind dying

I kept on dying anyway

I kept on dying at the same place I thought was giving life to me  

Because the day, you decided to give up on me

I already gave up on myself.

Dear papa,
you call me "daddy's girl" to the eyes of the world
and cut me off when I share my deep opinions
recycling your feel-good sources
your love is conditional
to how great I can make you feel

Dear mama,
you spell me out in your sour words
defining me with my shortcomings
you see your mistakes in me
calling me "a weak child with no guidance"
unaware that you have never shown real guidance

Dear lover,
you fail to show real emotions
to anything that is less than perfect
my imperfections threaten your ego
i am clearly invisible  
fighting through your lack of empathy

Dear self,
you have been buried deep into your mind
obsessing over the ways your dearests have failed you
despite the unconditional love you give
It is time to start recognising how you have failed yourself
and fight for your own peace

You asked me why I like you
But I didn’t want to tell
Some of my reasons are cheesy...
But here is why I fell

I love the way your lips curve
When I make you smile
It makes me want to pull you close
And kiss you for awhile

I love the way your eyes twinkle
When you talk about things you love
I truely believe
You are a gift from above

I love that you are compassionate
You have such a big heart
That was the first thing I noticed
Right from the start

I love the way it feels
When you hold me tight
I finally feel safe
Like I could sleep through the night

I love that you don’t judge me
For my less than perfect self
That is more attractive
Than any amount of wealth

There are so many more reasons
But I’ll start with just this few
Maybe someday
I’ll give this poem to you

:)

Dividing zero
By any number will still
Leave you with zero.

If you have no love
To begin with, nothing can
Force it to appear.

Dividing zero
By any number will still
Leave you with zero.

I see a pimple
Bright on my face
There are quite a lot
To even trace

They travel down
My neck and back
It really makes
Me feel like crap

There are quite a lot
Of things I hate
Like my short legs
And nose that's not straight

My hands are small
Kinda stubby
I have stretch marks
Around my tummy

Even though I have things I hate
Never would I change

For I love it all
Even my so called 'flaws'

My body is mine
And I'm pretty **** fine

The moon lit upon us
As if there was a spotlight
I looked into your eyes and it felt like cluster-like

The stars were there residing
As if there was a galaxy
I held your hand and it felt like ecstasy

The sky was dim
As if there was nobody else but us
I shoot for a kiss too bad I missed

And you,
I gazed at you
You were wonderful