Sve počne kada nastupi tišina. Kada prestane svo šuškanje, lupkanje, svi koraci i kikot. Kada ostanem sama u svojoj sobi, u kojoj je jedini izvor svetlosti sveća sa mirisom vanile.
Tada, dok ležim pokrivena omiljenim mekanim ćebetom koje mi je poklonila baka još kada sam bila mala, tok misli me vodi u svetove za koje nisam ni znala da postoje. Ne osećam težinu svog tela, ne vidim više ni svetlost sveće. Veoma je slično snovima, ali ipak ne sanjam.
Odjednom, srce mi jače kuca, disanje mi se ubrzava i iz mira me izbacuju misli, koje sada ne teku, već jure kao da se takmiče koja će pre da dopre do mene. Nekim danima su to misli koje izgledaju kao polje maslačaka u proleće, obasjano suncem, u kom se čuje samo cvrkut ptica i moj smeh. Sa druge strane, moje misli mogu da izgledaju i kao sklop svih prirodnih nepogoda. Tada sklupčana sedim u uglu svog uma, osetim vrelinu požara i čujem grmljavinu, ali ne vidim ni prst pred okom.
Mada, kao što ništa u životu nije crno-belo, nisu ni moje misli. Uvek postoji taj međuprostor, to šarenilo ili ponekad samo praznina. Mnogo puta mi se desilo da uđem u svoj um i da on izgleda kao beskonačno bela soba puna pitanja. Koja pitanja se nalaze na beskonačno belom zidu vašeg uma?

Ljubav. Šta je to? Večita tema čoveka u matriksu života. I zato je često teško pronaći reči da se opiše, jer je pravih reči malo. To je... Energija koja pokreće svaki atom na planeti Zemlji. Čudo koje se dogodi kada se najmanje nadamo. Posebna grana umetnosti. Šesto čulo. To je hiljadu godina u jednom trenu, grom u jednom dodiru, čitava kjniga u jednoj reči. Bezbroj trenutaka kojih nikada nije dovoljno ili previše. To je jedino rešenje za problem egzistencije čoveka. Potreba za ljubavlju može biti neurotička, sadistička i mazohistička i samim tim ljubav se može pružiti i pokazivati na mnoge načine prema mnogim stvarima. Putevi ljubavi su nepredvidivi i možda nas baš u trenutku slučajnog pogleda pogodi Amorova strelica i tada osetimo onaj čudan osećaj u stomaku. Posle tog događaja svet gledamo kroz ružičaste naočare i realnost nam je samo u dnu malog mozga. Živimo u oblacima i nijedna prepreka nije toliko velika da nas može zaustaviti na putu ka ostvarenju zelje za ljubavlju.

Jedini Čoveče od Svemira,
Zahvaljujem Višoj Sili za to što je stvorila tebe, Čoveka, od milijardu svemirskih čestica i poslala te meni, Ženi, željnoj istraživanja misterija iz Svemira.
Zahvalna sam joj i za to što postoji Vreme, Vladar Sveta, dimenzija, nepovratno neprekidan redosled nastajanja i nestajanja i sled događaja, zbir nevremenskih trenutaka ili možda iluzija, jer je upravo Vreme doprinelo našoj veličanstvenoj fuziji.
Zahvaljujem joj i za to što mi je podarila čula; čulo vida, da vidim svaki delić tvog bića; sluh, da čujem svaku reč koju izustiš, bila to glupost ili nešto što ima smisla; čulo mirisa, da osećam tvoj miris do kraja života na Zemlji, a i onog koji sledi posle tog, čulo ukusa, da, sa na hiljade svojih mikroskopskih ćelija na jeziku, uživam u tvom umamiju i čulo dodira, da osetim tvoje prste, usne i dah na svom telu.
Takođe joj zahvaljujem i za osećanja, jer bez njih ne bi bilo ni nas; za radost, sreću, uzbuđenje, ljubomoru, požudu, strast, ljubav, brigu, strah, tugu, bes, gnev, čak i gađenje, jer sam sve to doživela i preživela sa tobom.
Verujem da su ljudi sačinjeni od zvezdane prašine, ali ti, Čoveče od Svemira, ti si Supernova.
Volim te, beskonačno i izvan toga.
////////////////
The only Man of the Universe,
I thank the Higher Power that created you, Man, of one billion cosmic particles and sent you to me, Woman, eager to explore the mysteries of the universe.
I am grateful to her for having there Time, the ruler of the world, dimension, an irreversibly uninterrupted sequence of emergence and disappearance and the sequence of events, the sum of the timeless moments or perhaps the illusions, because it is precisely Time that contributed to our magnificent fusion.
And I thank her for giving me the senses; the sense of sight, to see every part of your being; hearing, to hear every word you utter, no matter if it’s stupid or something that makes sense; sense of smell, to feel your scent till the end of life on Earth, and the one that follows after that; the sense of taste, that with thousands of microscopic cells on my tongue enjoy your umami and the sense of touch, to feel your fingers, lips and breath on his body.
Also thank her for the feelings, because without them there wouldn’t be us either; for joy, happiness, excitement, jealousy, lust, passion, love, concern, fear, sadness, anger, anger, even disgust, because I experienced it all and survived to you.
I believe that humans are made of stardust, but you, Man of the Universe, you are Supernova.
I love you, infinitely and beyond.

I can't take it anymore.
Seeing you unhappy while spending beautiful moments and making unforgettable memories with me.
And realizing you're actually looking for something different.
Something I can't give you.
Not in a million years.
But all you do and all you have to say when I ask you what's wrong is "I'm tired, it's been a long day.".
Yes, I know you're tired.
Tired of me, tired of waiting for the perfect moment, for my little mistake, a trigger to end this.
One thing you don't know is that I love you madly.
And when I do so, I don't make mistakes.
Never.
But I'll break my rules for you.
I'll make that mistake you're secretly waiting for.
And it will be a big one.
I promise.

I still remember the day when you sent me that message, I laughed for fifteen minutes straight
At first it was nothing especially but somehow I knew you would change my life
I became a happy person the moment I became aware that you exist in my world
I always thought it would be easy to stand in front of you and say how I felt
And now I'm standing in front of you, looking into your eyes but I forgot to talk
I don't recall any words but have so much to tell you
You helped me when no one else was there for me, you saved my life many times not knowing that
And I don't know how can I thank you
But there's no place for concern, I have beyond infinite for that

We are more
than we're showing

I know it hurts
sometimes
to be different

but diversity is essence
in this alienated world

it's absurdity
revolt
and try to exist.

She lit a cigarette
Tears racing down her cheeks
She was a mess
Magnificent chaos
And she wasn't afraid
Of giving birth
To the madness.

I fixed my wings.
I'm tasting the air,
Bathing in feathers.
Illuminating the night sky.
If you see me,
Don't distract me.
I'm finally flying.

They asked me what my greatest fear was.
I thought for a moment and then it hit me.
Really hard.
I almost felt the pain of the fact itself.
The fact i could die without finding the one who makes me weak.
Weak in the most beautiful possible way.
That kind of weakness when i can't move any part of my body.
Such a weakness when the only thing you feel is tickling.
But for the moment, in the mess of my thoughts, only thing I can think of is you.
Suddenly I'm feeling numb because you could be the one.
The one who could make sure i never fear.
Because your eyes are pure stars.
And your fingers, when they touch me, freeze me to the bones.
But in spite of that I feel so alive and so infinite.
It's like that numbness gives me energy.
Isn't it ironic? Life is a paradox.
We are all made from stellar stuff.
And nuclear fusion gives us goosebumps.