my mom keeps asking me if i'm alright
but how can i answer her
when even i don't know
if i am moderately fine

believe me,
i've tried to sleep .

i long for that nothingness
i'm allowed to feel .

but every night
my mind betrays me .

How easy it is,
To get lost in a universe
that is entirely your own.

i admit
my life has become an
endless blur of days
and nights
conversation i never had
and poems i have yet the strength to write.

I think we call relate to drowning
even if you can swim ,
even if you love water,
even if you feel dry
even if you feel nothing but and endless ocean of nothingness.

if you’re human,
and even if you are not
You know what it is be surrounded .

you know what is to be consumed

to feel like a god
to feel like a mortal
to feel like prey
to feel like predator.

if you’re human,
And even if you are not
you know what it is to drown


and not want to come up for air .

I assume we are scared of death because we don’t want life to end

but Death wants to live too,

The sun has to go away
For the moon to be able to shine .