I'm a revolving door.
pushed around and stepped on until I'm dizzy and sore.

Used only for your own benefit.
And then you say words that make me feel like ****.

for those who are concerned; I dispersed within the vastness of outer space.

My body, once caged all the stars, are finally in its resting place.

Maybe here, I am finally seen by those who romanticize the deathly night.

I am at a tranquil state, where all the planets are aligned just right.

No deaths, no violence, no wars, no fights.

No existential pain or crisis to plague a human's state of mind.

I am bound within the molecules of space and time, dancing on asteroids, I am entwined.

Finally, my body is free from the darkest of pains that had wallowed in my rib cage.

All the bottled emotions that had forever kept me enraged.

I have exploded into a beautiful mess, now the size of silica.

I am in motion, twinkling for those bellow in such a sorrowful world, as they paint me in Starry Night replicas.

They'll be envious to hear that I am conversing with Van Gogh himself.

We are in the cloudless night, a painting in a museum, and history within books on a bookshelf.

We're sprinkled in the dark like a beautiful combustion.

All the answers written in the stars for what we once questioned.

He tells me "be clearly aware of the stars and infinity on high."

And that was enough for me to just get by.

I am a galaxy, freed in the vastness of the universe.

Into this new life of neighboring planets and meteors, my body will immerse.

I am the stars you see on your lonely nights.

And this time, please take your time to analyze my light.

I know I'm a mess, but I can make it beautiful.

For what it's worth, I once took the form of a dying artist, whom was so mutable.

A warm heart that once beat,
Is cold as ice from tragedy, sorrow, and defeat.

"It's over, I cant do this anymore. It's better for the both of us."

I heard those words and I feel my body being crushed and shattered by the tires of a bus.

I know you couldn't see it, but I visioned the world being hit by a meteor.

My world, to be exact, and I begin to transform into delicate paper, and you, a sharp scissor.

And we all know that scissors beat paper. I just didn't think it would be this soon.

Because in my eyes, I was the atrocious sun, and you were the beautiful moon.

A tragedy, I must say.

I mean, I guess no one really expects this type of love to go away.

I mean, hell, even I didn't want to believe it.

Because you began to cry and I had to offer you my solace and comfort.

I had to choke back my razor sharp tears.

And protect you from all of your fears.

Just like I always have tried to love you for your heart.

But it only seemed that my love wasn't your preference of art.

To this day, I regret comforting and letting you cry as I sit on my bed staring at my laptop screen trying to calm you down.

And you were so selfish to not see that I kept you afloat while I started to drown.

And I just want to say that I ******* hate you but I still love you so ******* much.

And I want you to feel pain but I also want to love you again, but just enough.

I had hoped you would give me a second chance.

But oh, with those sweet, hope filled words, you had me in a trance.

Until I realized that it wasn't going to happen, oh not at all.

And my friends became a razor and the edge of a building, 40 stories tall.

When did my love notes turn into suicide notes?

When did my perfume become an ocean of sunken boats?

And, oh, how long did you keep this love facade on me?

One, two months, maybe even three?

What was it that had made you leave instead of stay?

Because you said it were the fights that made you go away.

But honestly, I think that's *******, because if you were so mature like you claimed to be,

You would have sat me down and talked it out, but instead you closed the door behind you and locked it with a key.

And oh **** no, don't you dare tell me that I shouldn't have gotten so attached.

Because you encouraged our plans for our future together to leave our horrible past.

You told me you loved me and swooned me with such diction.

But then again, you led me on for a couple of months, so how can I know that wasn't fiction?

I just don't know what to think of that night.

It was a signed waiver for my death, timed just right.

I'm just kidding, ***. You only added onto my stress of tests and the end of school.

And you sure did your job at making me your fool.

And today, I still cant breathe when I think about you creating future plans with someone else.

As I stand here fumbling the ceiling so that I can hang this death providing belt.

I hope you got what you wanted, the happiness of being alone.

But I hope you know, when you come back home, I'll be dead on the floor, a person whose heart you once owned.

Just like it's always been for people like me.

But I know you can't see all of this because your tears made your vision blurry.

But I ******* hope you see that you completely shattered and broke me and I had to be ******* strong because I had hoped if I did I can prove to you that this can all be fixed,

But...

Now I'm trying to to go about this alone and refrain from getting my emotions and sicknesses mixed.

I hope you feel happy that you killed the person who loved you so dearly...

And even through all this mess, still I will be dumb enough to take you back into my arms if you ever wanted to, but that's just my theory.

And I reminisce our memories and your gifts and force them into a box.

But I much rather be in one 6 feet down the earth, because I'll only perceive myself as an orthodox.

A contradictory, a mess, someone who can be replaced.

As I stand my ground and move on from you at such a slow pace.

I'll do something stupid, like fall in love with you and stuff

Until one day you realize that it wont be enough

I wont be enough for you.

And I will cry and tear apart my room.

And the dark days will begin to loom.

And I will begin to lose myself in this mentality to.

In April, the cherry blossoms bloom.

And so will my impending doom.