When you left you said
We would still wish on the same star
We would still hear each other's heart beats,
We would see each other when we see the moon,
*You said we would find each other again
And we would dance underneath the starry starry sky,
We would be forever
But we never did.

Funny when you tell me
The thing you need is an anchor.
Because the last few days
Have taught me so much.
All I wanted when we first met
was to know that we would leave together.
But from the start I could feel it,
I felt like I was going to be suffocated.
The last several weeks,
I have laughed more, I have done more…
And I finally feel free.
And by being free I can see now:
Constantly trying to fix us
Is the thing that has been killing me slowly.
And I don’t want to do it anymore,
I don’t want to fix it or fix us anymore.
Maybe instead of loving you so hard
I should be myself for a while.
I should love me.
And you should love you.
I want so much for you.
For both of us.
So much more than this.
More than being stuck
With someone who feels stuck.
I want you to feel free too.
But no matter how hard we try,
We have to realize some things
Just can’t be fixed.

Everyone you meet
is broken glass, a
destroyed
pile of a
person.

Pieces of us lie all over the ground.
You have to be careful
where you step.
We have all been
dropped and cracked
and kicked.

We are all ******- some worse
than you. You at least tried to
pick up the mess
along the way. Most people
leave pieces
stranded. A fraction of
a soul as
road ****.

Everyone is stepped on and crushed
and dug into the ground,
soaked like red wine into the
off-white carpet.
There will never not
be a stain.

You handed me one of your
puzzle pieces,
a fragment of shell,
a souvenir.
I tried to glue you back
together, to carry you, to fix
you, my darling, because
we traded.

I tried to give you
my pain as well, heart shaped and
sharp like chipped bone. But
it didn't fit, and it was heavy,
and it was mine. So you
gave it back.

I'm putting it down
because I'm tired of messing around.
And even if I could
try and fix us, I don't think I would.
I said goodbye
because I knew it was foolish to try.
So why do I find
you're still dancing up and down inside my mind?
I'm keeping my past
exactly where it's at
because you can't keep living for what used to be.
And when you go too fast
it's hard to make it last
and after all this time I finaly see;

We were never meant to be together
I know we keep on trying,
that's why we keep on lying.
We were never meant to be forever.
It's an easy thing for us to dream on,
but I think it's time we fly on
free.

I guess we could stay.
It might be a little easier that way.
But passion will fade
and we'll both regret the choices we've made.
God knows that we tried
to sort things out inside
and to try to figure out how to make it work.
But all the love aside
the pain just won't subside
and we're paying more for this love than it's worth.

We were never meant to be together.
I know we keep on trying,
and that's why we're keep on lying.
We were never meant to be forever.
It's an easy thing for us to dream on,
but I think it's time we fly on free.

I set you free.

I was always the kind of kid who liked to fix things
I bought myself a pink hammer when I was 8 years old
and I liked to “fix” things with it.
turns out I wasn’t all that good at fixing and I
mostly just broke things.
nobody really had a problem with it until
I broke myself and then
fix yourself!
they scream
go! nail yourself back together!
but all I really feel like doing is sawing myself in half.
I could see myself failing to fix anything,
watching helplessly with my pink hammer while they
screamed loudly, endlessly
fix yourself fix yourself fix yourself fixyourselffixyourselffixyourselffixyourself
they tried everything.
they took pliers and pried open my brain they
measured and remeasured my sanity with tape and pills
that looked suspiciously like
the bubble in those bars you use to make sure something is even
my mother and father wore safety glasses as i took an axe
to my sense of self and buried it with
a shovel bigger than the three of us
“she’s a bit of a fixer-upper” they say
as if they’re selling a house
they try to fix me up, gorilla glue me together but
it’s too little, too late
I sawed myself in half and there’s
no fixing this one.

Through our time together I too learned a lot.
I've taken the experiences and grown from them.
I learned not to give up at the first sign of trouble. Sometimes the discomfort fear provides is necessary in order for us to better ourselves.
I'm sorry for blowing things out of proportion.
And mistakes I never atoned for.
I'm sorry for the times I was so busy trying to fix you that I forgot to improve myself.
I wish you many successes in your future.

Letting go
It hurts
It hurts more than anything I've ever done
But there are some things that I just
Cannot fix,
No matter how much I might want to

I was pouring so much of myself into you,
Trying to fill you up
But you were a bucket
Not a bucket that had a hole,
No
But a bucket without a bottom.
And there would just never be enough of me to fill you.
The world would flood before I could fix you

I'm sorry
But I can't be the only one fixing you
You have to fix you, too.

me.gs

I picked up a blade again today
Needless to say I am not okay.
I'll be better "some day"

But I guess
I can decide to say
I will be better today.

Just because I ***** up
doesn't make me a ***** up.
You are defined by your actions.
But I can decide:
to be defined
by what's left in my stride
before I trip and stumble and fall,
or by what's ahead,
despite it all.

I'll choose the latter
and I'll move on...
I will be strong.

Because I am not as weak
as I seem to think
I am strong
and my God
will hold me in his mighty arm.

I picked up a blade again today.
But I can honestly say
**I am going to be okay.