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I've been married for 25 years
Though some have said that I blew it
Many laughs and tears, but only one child
And took 3 husbands to do it.
Only if I added UP all 3 marriages-ha!  My beloved son just visited me for an early Christmas celebration.  I get all wrapped up in making candy & baking for the holidays.  Merry Christmas to all!  I'll get back to writing soon...
The strings of my heart have snapped, said Job
Have I had sorrow like that?
That return trip I take to anguish
All my energy is sapped

It feels like too much sorrow
No hope of coming up clover
Like the tongue to the sore tooth
Replays it over and over

My broken heart cannot stay away
From what has hurt me the most
It takes up hours of my time
While I’m hosting my own roast

Lamenting, regretting, I'm busy
Ruminate, perseverate, too
I disconnect from reality
Not seeing how I’ll make it through

Composing clever conversations
For a moment I see light
When my heart opens wide to recover
Making all things turn out right

But, no, it’s not meant to end well there
I must suffer for all my crimes
And relive how my heart got broken
Once again till the end of time.
 Dec 2015 Kaitlin Floyd
Ami Shae
Awaiting the moment
when peace will return
when somehow
my mind, my body
will learn
that this life is not
my enemy
but instead
my vessel
for finding my way.
 Dec 2015 Kaitlin Floyd
Ami Shae
If trust is so sacred to you
why are you so stingy with it?
Why, I wonder can you not
forgive and move on
and allow the future
to unfold as it is meant to unfold
instead of constantly searching
for reasons to chase the past?

If trust is so sacred to you
then why will you not give it freely
and allow it to shine forth
and become a real part
of who you are
instead of placing it
crumb by crumb?

If trust is so sacred to you
then why not give truly from your heart
and let all who know you feel and see
that you carry such beauty
inside of you
instead of wearing that hateful fear
that eats you up inside?

Trust.
You say you want to trust me,
yet you refuse to really try.
Always searching for tidbits
to prove that you cannot have
peace of mind--
yet too, you are always, always
looking behind--

If trust is so sacred--
then allow the future to unfold
without strings knotted up
from the past.
No one can trust when they refuse
to look forward
rather than looking back...
I wont deny all the good we shared,
Was overshadowed by the bad.
It's lying here remembering those times,
Thats whats making me really sad.
~ ♦ ~
I walked away from the only person,
I've ever felt so strongly for.
Things we did together will last,
Such things don't end upon exiting the front door.
~ ♣ ~
There are times I question the integrity of my decision,
Asking if I'd made the right one.
When push comes to shove in this moment,
It was something I felt had to be done.
~ ♠ ~
This does not mean that I do not desire,
Meaning I still wish I had you there.
If only it had been better,
I think this love could've lasted my dear.
~ ♥ ~
It's surprisingly harder to utter a simple phrase,
Something as simple as "I love you".
Perhaps it seems that I don't wish to speak it,
But believe me, at this point in time, I really do.
~ ◘ ~
For paragraphs and monologues,
I could write till my hearts content.
All things aside, in attempt so you'd understand,
Our time apart, should be time well spent.
I can't say I ever foresaw things going the way the way they did. Nor can I say that either decision was going to be a worthy one. I guess, time will tell us what is to happen. Things are too much for me at the time being, so for now, itll be no one im seeing ♥
They ask too late,
how to fix me,
as if they don't know,
a broken vase,
no matter the mending,
will always remain...broken.
I have fallen in love with my sadness
But I am consumed by my madness
 Dec 2015 Kaitlin Floyd
RisingUp
Me
 Dec 2015 Kaitlin Floyd
RisingUp
Me
Today I've decided just to be me
Today I've decided to not care what others see

I don't want to be on the pursuit
Of pretty or thin,
I'd rather be on the pursuit,
Of the girl that lies within.

This may not be easy
In fact, it's very tough
Thanks to media and advertisements,
but now I've had enough.

Lose weight, get longer lashes,
Make your body flawless and pretty.
But we fail to idealize individuality,
Instead label imperfections, what a pity.

So now I'll take a stand,
against the companies that push their brand.

I don't need their things to be happy,
for they promote false goals.

I need to learn to accept being me
Without caring what my internal critics,
or others
see.
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