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Have you ever touched a flame?
I don't believe I have.
My body has burned
on coals and embers.
My fingers have scorched
on stovetops and lighters.
My hands have followed
sweet candles and incense.
And my eyes have danced
with the flickering dames.
But I ask you again,
if it isn't too much,
have you ever touched a flame?
Can a flame truly be touched?
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
brat bunny
She stares at her ceiling once again
A hundred thoughts hang in her head
She looks at her reflection once again
A thousand thoughts are shredded thin
She smiles at him once again
A million thoughts die with the passing sun
She stares at her ceiling once again
A billion thoughts are buried deep
She closes her eyes
For the first time
She sleeps
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
sunflower
It's beautiful,
the sun rising.
It's beautiful,
the sun setting.
For how it coloured the sky,
into a combination,
of rose quartz and serenity.
For every time,
the colour changed.
It's beautiful,
how I thought of them.
For every time,
I stare at the pantone sky,
and paint colour in my eyes,
ㅡ I know, they felt the same.
For how we engraved in each others' heart. Let's stay like this, forever.

ㅡn.s
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
Kush
My hands reached for yours
Holding them in between
Just like it happened
In all dreams, I had seen

You smiled; I smiled
"You are beautiful," I said
"No. You are." You said
As if in protest.
...
As I fall in love
With her I dream
Of True Love
Only with her could
I ever feel True Love
As our hearts embrace
The power of love
A forever love with her
As I whisper softly
Two her,
I love you forever.
True Love
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
Airned
What am I?
I know the obvious answer is "human",
But I mean it in a more focused way.
What am I to you?
Am I the one whose heart you wish you never broke?
Or the one you wish would fade away for his own good?
Am I the one you kissed so much out of appreciation and maybe unspoken affection?
Or a sullen reminder of the things you may have thrown away?
Am I the sweet sullen soul with a constant smile on his face, who always saw the good in you, and was never angry when you didn't speak, for I was fluent in silence?
Or am I the angry and bitter soul with fire in his eyes, who voices his grave concern and disappointment with the roads you have taken?
Am I the friend you hold so dear, and swore to never let go?
Or am I just a secret now, and nothing more?
The answer is simple
As clear as day
I am not one or the other
I'm both
I'm the one you wish you never hurt, and wish would let you fade, but I'm still here.
I am the one you showed such grand affection to, but you try to downplay like it was nothing, because from here it seems you still feel pain for it all, but I'm still here.
I am happy and bright soul who knows the good you are and can do, but also the angry and sad one who looks on you and asks "What the hell are you doing to yourself?", but I'm still here.
I am still the friend you hold so dear, but also a secret you don't wish to have, because even though you hate lying to him you still do, but I'm still here.
And that shall always remain the same.
The yin and yang.
But one constant will always remain:
I'm still here.
Because to me, you were always worth it.
I was never as simple and one note as I seem to some. I have always been at a balance. I never changed. I have remained the same.

For the person looking for tone, or just a new song to jam to: "The Same Boy You've Always Known" - The White Stripes
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
John
Marilee
 Feb 2018 jza aguilar
John
A night filled with dreams of love
It was like you were almost there
But then I awaken to loneliness
Warm hearts now iced with despair

These night are the hardest
They start out Heaven built
But always end with me in tears
Filled with remorse and guilt

How can I have been so stupid
I can honestly say.
To **** all trust and love
To drive you away.

They say with age comes wisdom
Yet I do not seem to ever learn
I continue to hurt the ones i love
For which my soul will forever burn

My battle with addiction
My battles within my head
Have taken everything for me
And left me for dead.

The guy with so much potential
Intelligent , charismatic an incredible heart
Yet a head filled with demons
Dooming me from the start.

God heals all hearts
He can take away our pain
But what does he do
with a ****** up brain.

A half century has passed
My life should be at its best
But that again is just a dream i awaken from
Heart again ripped from chest.

Destined to be alone
My heart to not share
Thank you brain
For this cross I will always bare.
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