i wish i had never met you
i manage to somehow stammer out.
in between the long tokes i take
from liquid nostalgia

but sadly,
even i know that's not true.

but saying
'i still dream about you'
feels as pathetic
as the shattered remnants
of my pride

i've always said
time is a liar --
only sending you
the warm, slow dances
in the middle of a room.

without showing
the heart break
that quickly came after.

but for tonight,
i'll ride out this high  (or low)



and pretend that you loved me
as i loved you.

we've all been in it.
not knowing what to do
or just what to say.

tiptoeing around the parts of yourself
you're not quite ready to reveal.
scared that one skeleton
peaking from the closet

could scare them away

but you said monsters
never scared you,
that life isn't fun without a little risk.

so I took your words,
and used them.
I showed you those things,
that I said I would never again show.

and you never f a l t e r e d,
never flinched.

you fell in love with me,
fell in love with those parts
that even I was still afraid to love.

knights in shining armor don't exist
and you can't wait for the prince
to rescue you from the dragon.

but when you find that person,
that loves you on days
when you're the dragon,
treasure them.

and I promise you,
I will.

I think one of the worst things
about remembering bits of
you.

is that it always hits at
the times when I feel
the most bliss.

you truly were
a monster
you broke things,
I never knew could break.

and made me forget
all the parts of myself
I had finally grown to like.

but

I refuse to let this poem
be filled with the hate
you spewed into me

instead,
I will thank you.

because now,
when I look over at him.

I see all the things I needed
and all the things
you could've never given me.