When you dissipate, scattered shatter mirrors.

May 2014

eunsung aka Silas

DOA

are we dead on arrival from birth?

our lives feel like such a burden even
as we receive life's great joys.

am I the only one that feels this way?

the light of the sun shines even when
my own perception creates clouds to
cover the light.

am I truly free or forever pulled back into a slow surrender of indifference?

my apathy has been breaking away, but sometimes it returns to cover me
in darkness.

will love set me free?

#deadonarrival

May 2014

Hayleigh

Full stops, to crop, our faults.

Let’s write a poem
For the fun of it
Rhyme, combine, design
Thoughts, phrases, words
Stanzas absurd.

Let’s use alliteration
1st, 2nd, 3rd person narration
Let us not forget
Capital letters, commas and full stops
To crop,
Our faults.

Let’s write about love, loss and heartache,
Let’s make mistakes
Relationships, politics,
Let’s get lost, in this;
Wonderful world of ink and paper.

Let’s dangle emotions
Delicately of straight
Lines, text, worth
Thousands of pounds
To someone.

Let’s dribble prose across the page
Lead rhyme
Into an organised,
Coherent line

Hold hands with demands
Laced, not closed,
Of errors dispose.

Let’s write a poem
For the fun of it
Watch it age, as the pages, discolour.
But remain as beautiful, if not more so
Than it were, when first composed.

May 2014

Meenu Syriac

Paranoia

I am haunted by my fears even in the morning sun
And irrevocably consumed by some daunting shadow.
At night they come in forms of terror
And in my disdain I cry and shiver.
Lost in an illusion my mind sowed
And in that realm I die a thousand times.
Tethered to life by a thin rope
An infinite foot fall to the unknown.
Those lines are waiting to break
The fog rising and the lights dimming,
Darkness engulfs and seeps into my blood.
Now in its arms I find solace
This paranoia feels like home.
This darkness sparking a storm,
And with the storm comes chaos
And in that chaos, *my mind revels.

#madness #paranoid #inanotherworld

May 2014

irinia

no need for a title

It happens
more and more rarely
in my ankle
run, run, run
catch the streetcar
named desire
(I cry with you Tennessee)

decanting the hours,
a rush into nowhere
in honeycombed memory
the dregs of days
set my teeth on edge,
deepen the archway
of naked irises
hurled into midnight

It happens
lighter and lighter
in my left shoulder
pierced with sunset
lost in a sparrow

May 2014

Xyns

I Am

i am
the lion
under your bed

i am
the noise
waking the dead

i am
the boy
banging his head

i am
the trust
reduced to only rust

i am
the struggle
of going completely under

i am
the life
that broke in the night

i am
the monster
in your open closet

i am
the woman
screaming ****** ******

i am
the lie
that infected everything

i am
the secret
you hide from yourself

i am
the demons
swimming through your mind

i am
the honesty
that you left far behind

i am
the dust
on your recorded thoughts

i am
the allegiance
left trampled in the dirt

i am
the power
given to your pain and hurt

i am
the sadness
that defines your person

i am
the reality
that numbed your heart

May 2014

The Unspoken

On A Day As This...March 5th

I never knew the ugliness of pain,
I never felt the pinch of a hole in my heart
I never knew the emptiness of life...Till you left my life.
If I would, a break up would be easy, because I would know that somehow, you moved on the phase of earth,
Somehow, I would find an excuse to drop you a "wrong text"
Somehow, I would find myself at your door, and convince you "I was in the neighbor hood" so decided to come say hello.

But the miles between me and you now is infinite...
The hollow and gap in my soul is deep than the pits of hell.

I'd have sworn four years with you would multiply to 8, then 16 then 24...
Time stole you away too soon.
As I watch my shadow upon your grave, in this sunset, my tears flow..
Just as fresh as when I received that call from your doctor that you wanted to see me.
Then slowly I walked by your bedside, but you NEVER said a word, just a smile on your face with your black eyes shut.
Then the words that pierced my soul as never before "Shee, has left Us"...
sigh...

I hate it when people leave!!..
It scares me when someone leaves.
You knew that, but you still left.
With that note by your side, that I am your forever.
That You had honored your promise and stayed with me to death.

As I write this, I cry...I sob like a little girl...just like the first time.
But since you gone, just remember, we only not in the physical...
but my heart, shall never forget you...
My first...My true.
I MISS YOU.
I DO.

Your Forever
©The Unspoken

March 5th...the day my day turned into night and all the songs I knew faded...
Its never been the same...
I Try.
In Memory of My Forever, Jaqy Shee.
Sleep well, Mpenzi wangu.

May 2014

Hayleigh

Trespassing.

You told me I wanted it,
But still to this day,
I don't think I've ever wanted anything less.
The feel of your hot breath
Against my *******,
Is a feeling I will never forget,
Though if wishes come true it'd be one of the few I'd chose
To lose.

You tore off my trousers
And in that instant,
You snatched away my innocence,
Like a thief in the night
And it was night,
Only thieves steel objects, not
Metaphorical representations of childhood.

This wasn't love making
This was sin,
And the devil danced in victory, between the sheets.

Tears laces my cheeks,
And dropped down my neck
And you lapped them up
In a split sec
Ond.
You trespassed all over me
With those poisoned lips
Those soiled hands
My hips didn't respond to the demands
You imposed and
I tried so desperately to close you out.

But,
You came in anyway,
Like a supermarket,
Despite the sign clearly lined to remind you
That it was out of hours.
Despite the plaque that said keep of the grass
You trampled on it anyway
And the hundred showers
I drowned myself in after
The fake smiles, the laughter
Still haven't succeeded in
Washing you out.
Of everything.
You seep through the cracks
Every night, as I hold myself tight
I have to remind myself
You're not there
You're elsewhere.
And people wonder why I struggle to sleep
My answer
I forgot how to count sheep
After the night you sliced up my dreams and threw me into relentless nightmares.

#pain #abuse #hurt

May 2014

Hayleigh

ink thoughts

There'd be no need to bleed
a pen of its ink
if only I had the ability
to decipher what I think.

May 2014

Chalsey Wilder

Life let me go

Life let me go
There's nothing to hold onto
Nothing
Cut my string
give the rest to someone who deserves it
End my life line Life
Life, friend, you're holding onto nothing, just like someone who holds onto the love that is no longer there
If there's nothing to hang onto you're falling
Life let me go
There's nothing, nothing good what's so ever by holding on to me
But if there is I don't know it
So tell me
Tell me if there is
I know there's nothing
No one wants to know my story
My story is not worth your two cents

*Life loves everyone and when it's time death falls in love with you too. And life may miss you while death has given you his kisses, but after a while, you may fade away from life's memory.

#love #go #life #death #story #let

May 2014

Hayleigh

Barely human

You slipped off my wings and made me human again.

#10 #angel #10w #10words #human #wings #tenwords

May 2014

Hayleigh

Train Tracks

When we were younger
We'd sit and play for hours
With dolls and beads and flowers
With toy cars and train tracks
And at the end of the day
We'd pack them away and put them all back.
We'd go down by the river
And laugh and shiver
And joke about growing old
Little did we know
What was about to unfold

As we grew older, the fires inside of us, began to smoulder,
The shoulders we'd come to rely on
Started to decay
As we made our way, into the world
Suddenly the dolls came to life
As our dreams of becoming a husband, a wife
Started to sour.
The beads formed nooses around our necks
As we began to lose our innocence
To drugs and ***.
The flowers shrivelled up and died
As we sat and cried our own rivers to drown in.
And those pretty little halos and silver tin crows
That used to iron out our frowns
S
   l
      i
        p
           p
             e
               d,
as we d i p p e d our toes into adulthood.
The toy cars crashed,
As we smashed head on, in a collision with reality.
And there was so need to plead
For the box with our train track toys
Because the little girls and boys inside us
Had died long ago.

And besides
We drew our own tracks up and down our wrists
And straight through our hearts.
As we began to realise
We were running out of
Fresh starts and new beginnings.

#love #suicide #pain #hope #loss #growingup #hurt

May 2014

Hayleigh

Freedom

I am working on freedom
But it's a work in progress
As much as I try and convince myself
I know I'm not ready. Not just yet.

To take responsibility,
For my safety and health,
To pick up a fork and keep down its wealth.
To prepare myself a meal
To allow myself to heal.
To put down a razor and use a different technique
Maybe one day,
But at present I am weak.
To walk innocently
Not compulsively.
To tackle negative thoughts in a productive fashion
One day will be the case
When I have the compassion.
To love myself like I do you,
Will take a long time to do.
To allow myself to make,
An error, a mistake
Without having to dance with my self defeating thoughts
I'm not quite out of those courts.

I am working on freedom
But it's a work in progress.
One day ill be ready. Just not yet.

Being in hospital *****, but I know it is where I need to be..

#depression #mentalillness #anorexia #selfharm #institution #hospital #inpatient #borderlinepersonality

May 2014

Hayleigh

10w on lies

I bit open a lie and it tasted like you.

#lies #10 #pain #hurt #10words #ten #tenwords