When She gets ready
She always thinks
'Will He like this? '
Before She puts on
The day's outfit.

In math class
She imagines him
Sitting next to her
Laughing that cute laugh
That She absolutely adores
So She can get
Through the period.

When She lies in bed
She can't ever sleep
Without imagining him
Wrapping his arms around her
Whispering how beautiful
He thinks She really is.

But when He passes her
In the halls,
He sees her as another girl
Blushing in his direction
as He turns his attention
to someone else.
The beautiful, blond skinny girl
With all that confidence and all that perfection
Who can never be with him,
Never hold him at night,
Never love him
The same way
The shy girl
With glasses can.

As She waits at the bus stop, a young man approaches her
“Do you have the time ma’am? ”
She ignores him and looks straight ahead, because if She speaks She won’t be able to hold it in
“Ma’am? ”
He steps directly in front of her, and before She can stop herself, She has her eyes trained on his
Everything about them is familiar
She can even see the small streaks of blue in the hazel that had made her feel safe with him so many years ago
And as He looks at her now, with deep concern in his eyes, She can pretend that He is the same as before
Like how his nose would crinkle when She cried because He hated it when She wasn't happy
And in the 8 seconds that have just passed She can see the realization of who She is flicker across his dilated pupils
She needs to ask ‘why? ’
She wants to be angry
But all She does is take out her phone and say “Half past twelve”
And He can’t even look at her as he mumbles “Thank you” and asks for a dollar
And when He asks for that dollar, something inside of her shatters, and then ignites a flame
Of all the things to say
Of all the things to ask
Of all the things to apologize for…
But She can’t waste this moment being angry with him
So She pulls out a twenty with a shaking hand
But as She goes to place it in his, his fingers intertwine with hers and She looks up just in time to be trapped in his gaze
Trapped in his gaze that whispers soft ‘I love you’’s and sincere apologies
And it is in this moment that He says “Thank you” and She knows that it isn’t just for the money
Suddenly She is wrapped in memories of them, and how they were before He sold his soul to the streets
They stand like this, just staring at one another for a moment, and then the bus pulls up and He releases her
He plants a butterfly kiss on her forehead and leaves, for what feels like the thousandth time
And for what feels like the thousandth time, She wants to tell him how much She misses him
She wants to tell him how much the little girl in her longs for his comforting touch
She wants to tell him how much his absence has changed their mother
She wants to tell him that no matter how high He gets, He still won’t make it to heaven
But She just gets on the bus, and lets the pain run down her cheeks, into her lap, and back into her skin
And She waits for the day when She is waiting at the bus stop when a young man approaches her
“Do you have the time ma’am? ”

Morn after morn, He awoke alone
And prayed for her return
Until the truth made itself known
That to have her heart, He'd have to learn

To gather up all of his strength
And fly away from here
To let love carry him any length
And not be driven by fear

If I stayed the same and did not move,
By the world I'd be left behind
I'd be static in my opinions and views
And be cast from others' minds

So I must evolve in my character
And the things I do and don't believe
Not so much to please another,
But in order to shape my higher self, and make that higher self, me

With this He made a promise, for today, and not tomorrow
To not be frightened by how the wind blew
To not be kept back by regret and sorrow

And so to his dreams, He **flew

She came to him one day and said
That She wished to fly
He met her gaze and shook his head
And begged her not to try

Her lips twisted and brows knit
As She failed to understand
Just why He wanted her to quit
And be content on land

An oath, She made, to herself to see
The stars She would explore
Although He said no just let it be
And wished to hear no more

She asked him why She shouldn't go
And why He so loved the ground
For She dreamed of soaring to and fro
And living amongst the clouds

He looked at her, sighed and said
That this journey would only lead
To disappointment in the end
As She would surely not succeed

Encouraged by his stinging words
She set out to do even more
She promised to be just like the birds
To not just fly, but to soar

So for a time, through night and day
She tried again and again
Until the morn She found her way
And rode, gracefully, the wind

She glided, majestically, here and there
And also far and near
And so She told him so, with love and care
That He had nothing to fear

Yet, on the ground He wished stay
And still refused to go
So the two went their separate ways
She flying high, and He perched below

Through his eyes, his sorrows fled
His heart a heavy stone
Because He had known how this would end
With her free, leaving him alone

And He remembered the day She said
That She had wished to fly
For it was not She he doubted, but himself instead
As He had never dared to try