A river flows through the backyard
Panic attacks under whiskey breath
Legs numb and gasping for air
Drowning in the driver's seat.

Falling down
Is not an excuse
To stay down

Falling into you I found myself
For with you I was never lost
Blinded by an unkind past
The present, tinged with shame
Became my only truth
Then... I saw you

You gazed upon me
Open and trusting
And I could no longer hide from myself
Your eyes peel me naked
And I stand bare before you
awaiting a judgment that will never come

You see what I thought I lost
What felt like it died long ago
You see who I used to be
Who I always have been
And because it's you
I believe it's true

Your smile is my hope
Your heart carries my heartbeat
Your eyes, so full of love
Prove that I am all I ever wished to be
All I was supposed to be
Before life beat the joy out of me

You found me and I knew
I knew you were mine
I knew you before I met you
I dreamed you alive so long ago,
And here in my heart, I fell in love
In your love, in loving you...

I can learn to love me

Two in the night isn't the right time
to be watched over by two eyes in silence
occasionally broken by a hushed voice
pack up sir, madam must be waiting sleepless.

Three in the night and he was right beside me
while the weary moon slanted to west
and dead insects lay on the floor
burned out by the joy of light.

Four in the night he was escorting me home
half a mile up the hill
when the stars were shedding light
fading with the dying night.

He died sometime after I left the island.

On sleepless nights he's there to see me off.
He could never be dead in my head.