Picture this:
Girl jumps up and down her bed lip syncing
Whitney's ' Dance with Somebody'
Girl cries every single time she watches a good love story
A helpless romantic she is

I was that girl
So when the day came
I fell HARD!
No shocker there
Thinking I was blessed because he fell harder
We were Adam and Eve in Eden
Before the biting of the apple
In our birthday suits without a care
Or a fear of prying eyes

And then it was all gone
Yanked from us
Futility became our reality
The naivety that was our future
I learnt it was never ours to keep
Evicted! we are to move
Onto our separate chapters
For vain had been my (our) inputs

Picture this:
Now
26 years 6months old
All drained out
Girl jumps up and down her bed lip syncing
No more , nothing left just
A Door hanger
That screams
'EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE'

©Belema.S.Ekine
(belemascribbles)

Love he penned down
In lines crafted with
Passionate chimes
Emotions he scribbled
In stanzas so smooth
Metaphor no longer
Could refrain locking
Hands with Simile
For within each rhyme
Were hidden rhythms
Of his fervent heart
Only she could decipher

©Belema .S. Ekine

So much to tell you. So much to show you.
So many back and forth. So many two way -
Conversations and emotions,
Giving and taking,
Vulnerabilities and experiences,
Sharing and creating;

Yet I find myself holding back words,
Suppressing feelings I have not trusted
for quite a while now.

I am stuck, frozen with anxiety.
Anxiety is a leftover.  I hate leftovers because
I am proud like that.  Anxiety is the PTSD I get
from falling all my life and not noticing until,

I hit the ground face down,
taking you with me and my pride;
for I was so sure
It was you.

My focus was wrong. It was not you.
That **** humbled me like a heart attack,
so I hide in plain sight; making connections
but cautious of the depth so you have an idea of
                                                    
but not everything. It is for the best,
I tell myself. I have to protect my hurt or
so I thought ‘til you asked the question
‘are you scared on my behalf?’

Hmmmmm, I never thought of it that way.
I guess I am scared on your behalf but,
but if I told you that, then I will be telling too much
and  I cannot;  my shameful pride

would not allow me.  It is ashamed and
can take no more,
especially if it is not you.
                                    
I have said too much and I have not said anything.
I have gone back and forth with myself one too many times.
I want to trust what I feel again but first these leftovers;

I have got to dispose. They have got to go.
So,
Anyone know where to  find
a herd of pigs?

©Belema .S.  Ekine
©belemascribbles

She set the game in motion
Crafted all the cards
To his bended knees
She dealt the wrong hand
Bluffing the years away
Like a hapless poker player
As was the rule of the game
She had no company
She did no pairs
Left unmatched, she became
The old maid in the game.

©Belema .S. Ekine

In the BEGINNING



There was you

And with you

Came me

It was us

Us against the world

Strolling towards the future

Side by side



Lost in a warp

With the world plugged in our ears

It is you and I

Against us

Our backs turned against the future

(a future frozen even with global warming)

We look behind

Remembering not LOT’s wife

And the PILLAR of salt.



The END

 

©Belema .S. Ekine

Ask what she wants, Ask what he needs
He'll write you an epistle, She'll sing you a psalm
Present all she needs, Avail all he requires
He buries them in the earth, She hides them in her purse
To her brother, She is the new era
To his sister, He is the long awaited change
First name, Pseudo
Last name, Grabby
Joined in unholy matrimony
They bring forth
EMPTY PROMISES and HYPOCRISY
Regurgitating from their long throats
Indigestible pellets, packaged as permanent solutions
Whilst
Skillfully silencing the many angels
Seated on their right shoulder
Ask him what he has done, Ask her what she is doing
And like ostriches,
Heads buried in the sand, Butts hanging out
They just don't care


©Belema.S.Ekine

No star in sight
For years on end
Just pitch black sky
And emptiness

The night came young
But now it is old
So why would it not
Give up the ghost

A light peeks out
Behind dark clouds
Shy and round
But still it shines

A waxing moon
On a journey grows
Delivering a bundle of
Joy in full term.

©Belema .S. Ekine

Look! A new star up above
A new wave is come upon us

Just as prophesy foretold
A child is born
Beneath Bethlehem's night sky
Wrapped up in swaddling cloth

O what a beautiful babe we have here
On a mission he has come

How do we welcome Him
Who did not just come but
Has always been in the beginning
With God

And is God
The Creator

Yes
The One who created the heavens and the earth
Said let there be light and there was light
The One who is King,  commands chariots of fire
With warrior angels at His disposal

His throne he leaves and now
He cries in a lowly manger filled with hay

JESUS is His name
O Sweet Baby Jesus
Vulnerable like the ones he came to save
O King Baby Jesus

The only one of his kind
Was, is or ever will be

For love is often given to babes when they are born
But love He brought with life's first cry
Love He taught,  Love He showed,  Love He gives
To all even though....

He comes so all can have life
Life in abundance

Yet He chooses to start life with an adventure
On a donkey,  across country
On the run from King Herod
Who was threatened by a little baby

O Great little one
Born with a destiny so grand

HE has chosen to live by example
For to save us,  HE becomes us to show us
Obstacles,  temptations, naysayers surround us
But our eyes we fix on the price

Just as HE did on the cross
For He lives so he would die

Die that we may live not only this life,
But the one eternal with the Father
His Father - God
For He has come to do His Father's work

This is His Son in whom HE is well pleased
Follow Him the new star

Like the wise men from the east did
With their gold, acknowledge his Kingship on earth
Adore His Priesthood,  Reverence His Sacrifice
Everyday for they are frankincense and myrrh

Treasures fit for the new born baby
The second person of the Trinity

Welcome
O
Little
One.

©Belema .S.  Ekine
©belemascribbles