A: Favorites

Oct 2016 A

Morgan

Good morning,
It's a beautiful day
to romanticize my own death

Good morning,
My brain is doing this
Brand new ****** up thing
And it's hardly 8 AM

I used to know how to float
Now I'm drowning

I used to know how to keep my distance
Now my feet are dangling over the edge

And I have this constant feeling in my stomach
Like I'm already falling

And I'd ask you to talk me down
But we haven't been talking

And I'd ask you to hold my hand
But you can't reach me
From where I've been hiding

I don't know
What it is
About this bed
That's begun to feel
Like a coffin

I drink coffee at night
And pills in the morning

I am tired
But not for a
Lack of sleeping

My dad has a doctorate degree
In civil law

I'm 22 and a freshman
With very little direction

I've been disappointed in myself for so long
But I haven't done much to change it

I thought maybe yoga
Would enlighten me
But I don't like the way
My body looks
When it bends

I thought maybe
A boy could save me
From feeling ugly
But he doesn't like they way
My body looks
When it bends

And he doesn't say it

He doesn't say much at all

But I could tell,

I was born intuitive

And I've been trying
Lately
To shake it

Cause everyone's thoughts
Are cold and painful

And I don't wanna see them
Anymore

I get paid
to bathe people,
to feed them,
to do their laundry,
And to make them smile,
But they still tell me
Right before they fall asleep
At night,
Right before I finally get
To leave them,
That I'm going to Hell
For the pictures in my skin
That I thought I needed
When I got them

I just wanna love something

I just wanna feel loved sometimes

There's a broken heart
on my right bicep
With a banner through it
That reads "myself"
And I'd say it's pretty honest

I've been breaking my own heart
Since I learned how to be
Introspective
When I was eight

I've been breaking my own heart

I just wanna be kind
To myself
And to the boy
Who holds me
And to the friends
Who call me
And to the family
Who supports me

I just wanna be kind
To my mind
And to my body

Show me how
To be decent

I'm so cruel
Anymore

Oct 2016 A

Wholesome Homes

Oct 2016 A

alasia

Wholesome Homes

It's safe to say I wasted more than time on him, wasted words on him, wasted breath and emotion and poetry on him but I realized recently that I stopped letting my world revolve around him, stopped thinking my feelings would live forever with him, I noticed I looked beautiful without him and that my eyes are astoundingly blue without his confirmation, that a shirt and my fat don't need an approval from him, I have felt confident about me because it's no longer about him. This is no epiphany, came with no warning but time and I can't help but feel accomplished. I am still me without him, want what I want regardless of him, tore down the walls of the home I'd imagined with him - on my own - and now I stand on foundation with which I will ***** sturdy structures to hold my slanted ceilings and paintings that make my heart race, fill the emptiness with books that remind me why I love, I have room for myself and this concept is new because I can spread and be free and see myself sewing on the couch and writing in my study and I am comfortable here but I can still do more with this space I've created, I can share it with others because that's what I want but I had forgotten to include myself, forgotten to consider my happiness. Among my paintings I want family photos and among my shelves I want books I've published and among my achievements I want a degree and a marriage certificate and I can have it all - without him. I can be selfless without ignoring my self and this is how I know I can love and be loved, because it's never been about what he meant to me or how I tried to prove it because I forgot to focus on how I felt about myself. And now I've remembered, and I feel whole.

#self #life #home #past #him #acceptance #confidence #growth #positivity #approval

Aug 2016 A

The Last Thing

Aug 2016 A

Tark Wain

The Last Thing

I wonder what I'll see right before I die
Not the moments flashing bright
nor the memories passing by

I mean the last thing
the image that I'll see
the feelings it'll bring

Will it be a neat summary of things I've seen
or perhaps a dying shout
at what things could have been

Or maybe it will be nothing at all
just a slab of concrete
after one long fall

Aug 2016 A

its now 4:27

Aug 2016 A

Doll Spaghetti

its now 4:27

another 4:12 goes by

my hand still stings
from the night I used it to punch through her wall
when I walked on the frostbitten sidewalk
and it broke my fall
when i got sick of hearing her talk and typed
"don't call me anymore"

those days weren't too long ago, really

i got my solace in the end that their winter's grasp dripped away from my body when your spring sun showed up
and gave way as your burning summer wildfire lit my coal'd heart

#you #for

Jul 2016 A

Moods, Moons, and Things I'm Not Allowed to Have

Jul 2016 A

Allison Jones

Moods, Moons, and Things I'm Not Allowed to Have

Yet sometimes when the backyard fills up,
and glows with that silvery grey light,
and I’m tucking into my big enough bed,
and fluffing all of the pillows around me,
my bones ache for your bones,
and my mouth waters for your mouth,
and my skin chills for your skin,
and my mind races for your mind,
and my heart cries out for your heart,
I miss you (and I shouldn’t even miss you).

#love #romance #unrequited #longing

Jul 2016 A

a poem for neptune

Jul 2016 A

Macy Opsima

a poem for neptune

who hurt you?
who played with you,
circling along in your own orbit
then slowly drifted away
once it was done collapsing with your body?
you still revolve around the sun.
the sun who's heat cannot even
reach your icy flesh and bones.
yet you still continue to move around it,
like a child circling their mother asking for something
like a dog barking continuously for attention.
the world behind you
is too small and weak to catch you when you fall
and the world in front of you
has its own personal fence of asteroids
preventing you from leaning on it's shoulders.
and you'll forever remain cold.
only touched by stones who'll do
nothing but carve scars into your crust.

#love #sad #sadness #hurt #romance #cold #planet #freeverse #lowercase #neptune

Jul 2016 A

Love is Blind

Jul 2016 A

Savannah Charlish

Love is Blind

Isn't it funny
How much we can love the wrong person
As if they were the right one all the while

Jul 2016 A

Ten Years After

Jul 2016 A

Y Rada

Ten Years After

I was a flower starting to bloom, curious on life, wanting to love, starving to dream of worldly and unworldly things. The little girl inside me was dancing with glee as I waited to be eighteen. An age to be an adult.

I wanted to be free.

My flower withered in these ten years past. I wanted too much of everything yet I never saved anything for myself. I gained something and I lost a lot. I reached almost the peak and here I am back at the beginning.

Freedom has its responsibilities.

Jul 2016 A

Abstinence

Jul 2016 A

Gabriela F

Abstinence

I put this cigarette between my lips
in the foolishness of maybe
it could make me poeticize.

Ingenuous thought when I know the only
drug able to mess with all my system is you.

More effective than nicotine, fogging all my mind
More dense than an smoke that I stubborn to
take to my lungs, your smell clogs my aerial vias.

More rough than the cigarette material
rubbing my fingers, your words scratch my skin.

More agonizing than abstinence, your distance makes
me writhe inside my own body, facing an intern fight
that always end in riot because I can’t decide between
leave you on your own luck or convince you that
we can be the lucky of each other.

And here is the living proof, here is the poetry
that i’m only able to extract from the collateral
damage caused by *you.

#love #heartbreak #poem #poetry #drugs #you #cigarette #abstinence