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Aug 2023 · 225
I hope
"I hope this isn't a repeat,
  I hope it's not all happening again,
  I hope we actually really learnt from our past mistakes,
  I hope we never get to regret this again."
We can only hope not to make some mistakes, but we learn from it all
Aug 2023 · 1.1k
Maybe I just want someone to look at me and tell me
"You're not a fool for always giving your all and loving people to the point that you empty yourself for them, you deserve the best and loving doesn't always have to hurt, I'm super proud of you for how far you have come, you're worth it and more than enough"
Just maybe that's all I wish to hear from the world.
In my feelings
May 2023 · 824
Love: A toxic game
I loved a person once,
Who showed me my own might,
I didn't know the strength I had,
Until they came into my sight.

They held me up when I was weak,
And made me whole again,
A precious love I thought I found,
That would never meet an end.

We walked the path of love and light,
Together we felt strong,
But as time went on,
It slowly went all wrong.

The love we shared turned toxic,
Our bond no longer pure,
Our troubles weighed us down,
We could not find a cure.

Our relationship broke us both,
It took its final stand,
The pain it caused, once so unknown,
Had now gotten out of hand.

But in that love, I found my strength,
That I could overcome any plight,
I learned that growth comes from within,
And that strength keeps me upright.

So I moved on from the toxic love,
And found peace in myself,
A strength that will never leave me,
A feeling I'll always be able to delve.
I'm not sure I moved on but I'm sure taking it one day at a time
Apr 2023 · 1.6k
The mad man
The mad man that we all knew,
Was lost in his own mind,
A tortured soul, misunderstood,
His thoughts, too intricate to find.

But in his madness, he found joy,
A comfort in his pain,
The world outside seemed a blur,
But inside, he was sane.

In his mind, he saw magic,
And colours so alive,
A world that no one else could see,
A place where he could thrive.

He found solace in his delusions,
And strength in his darkest days,
His madness brought him clarity,
In a world of chaotic ways.

Through his madness, he found art,
And wrote his own symphony,
A beautiful piece of music,
That only he could see.

Though we called him a mad man,
He was truly just unique,
A soul that danced to his own beat,
And found joy in his mystique.

So let us not judge the mad man,
For he found his joy in insanity,
And though his mind was perceived as broken,
He truly lived his own reality.
Insanity sometimes is a beautiful place to be
Apr 2023 · 273
Love: The sick game
I once loved a man,
Who made a bet on my worth,
A sick game he played,
To measure his own girth.

He wagered my virginity,
A trophy to be won,
His ego as fragile,
As glass in the sun.

I lost that bet,
And with it my innocence,
A love that was tainted,
By his selfish pretense.

He got me pregnant,
A life I never planned,
But he didn't want the burden,
And gave me an ultimatum to end.

I felt trapped and scared,
His words a heavy weight,
But I found the courage,
To choose my own fate.

I left him behind,
Never looking back,
An escape from the toxicity,
The strength I never knew I had.

My first love,
A painful lesson learned,
A reminder to never settle,
And that self-love is earned.
Love isn't always beautiful
Nov 2022 · 541
It happened
Just how I knew it wasn't for long,
Was it the distant look in your eyes,
Or the bitterness in your voice,
Something felt off, something was definitely wrong

You grew distant,
When you were close, you felt far,
I could only wait for it to happen
And it did,

It happened
You said those words like it's meant nothing,
"Let's break up"
It still feels like a nightmare I can't get up from,
I've lost sleep,

Yes it happened
It hurts more than I thought he would, and there's no solace cos everything reminds me of him, I cry to sleep yet get no sleep, this hurts deeper than anyother
Nov 2022 · 602
Life's Tales
It was love at first sight,
Or maybe lust,
Who knows?

Was it obsession?
Or Love
Who knows?

The deep feeling of rejection lies within,
That feeling that tells you all isn't well,
You can't fight it,
You can only wait for it.
I couldn't put the rambled thoughts to words but I hope someone understands the heartbreak
Jun 2022 · 588
Anxiety only makes me sick to my stomach
I don't want to be anxious when it's comes to us
I love the smell of your cologne
I love the sound of your laughter, but not the deep feeling in my guts that tells me you'd one day leave and not look back

Till then I would love to be the woman of your dreams

Anxiety keeps eating me up and I can't tell him, he's the man I love endlessly
Sep 2021 · 151
My not so good tale🤷
I don't know how to start, but I'm sure going to finish,
I'm going round in circles, I might as well start with singing,
I will sing songs, songs of my unending pains,
Tell tales of the time I felt alone, used, abandoned
Tales of when my heart gave away and it hurt continually,
Tales of how I covered up every moment with smiles,
I smiled so beautifully I almost believed it was me,
I wanted to believe I was that happy, but I was dropped.

See I found out something about me,
I get too emotionally attached to people and it comes hunting me,
Almost like everyone is waiting to drop me,
like they all get tired of me at some point,
like I'm really not what people want,
I realized I'm always an option, a not so good friend,
I want to cry but the tears already dried up
I mean I could get up but who wants me,
A little motivation is all I need
who cares die if you can, scream all you can
no one's coming to save you, to save me
I was born this way, prolly would die this way

who exactly am I?
It hurts, my heart is hurting deeply cos everyone I care about sees me as a second choice, an option feels like I'm a nobody... It hurts
What is life?
Could somebody be kind enough to explain,
What is living?
Could anyone be kind enough to show me?
I really need to know, I've lost myself in the process of trying to find myself,
I am dead in the process of trying to live,
The troubles of life has somewhat restricted my airflow,
I choke at every given second, I'm a wandering spirit on the earth with no goal as to where I'm headed,
I have lost all, friends, family and all I could ever boast of
Am I better of dead?
Would I be good if only I do not open this eyes anymore?

Is anyone out here, kind enough to show me what life is?
Is anyone here to explain life to me?
I'm drowning!!!!
I've lost myself in life, why trying to get myself, now I'm a complete stranger in my body, I need help from anyone at all, anyone here to listen to me??
Jan 2021 · 103
Just empty
Perhaps this is what the meant when they called somebody heartsick. Your heart and your stomach and your whole insides felt empty and hollow and aching
I always loved you
Jan 2021 · 232
So cold
How could you,
How could you be so cold,
How could you decide to show the inhumane side of you,
How could you be so annoying

I thought I was yours,
Yours to keep and cherish,
Yours to hold onto and never let go,
Yours to keep close

You touched me with your cold hands,
You made me sick to my stomach,
Called me names
And I lost my emotions

I became a wandering spirit,
Broken and embittered,
Cold to touch, cold to feel,
Alas! I've become so cold
Omo in this life I've been through a lot, gosh I was so tired, I've become so emotionless and I can't even feel myself
He would call my name everytime I passed,
Offering to lend a helping hand,
He would sing to me of how beautiful I looked,
Yet I didn't even give him a chance

I was too proud to speak to him,
Even while I was hoping one day he'd make it,
I was too angered by the way he called me,
Cos what does this niccur want from me

He greeted everyone,
Both the old and the young,
With an ever smiling face,
He was ready to brighten up our day

He was loved by many,
Yet got stabbed by those he cared for,
His death shook me
Now I'm left to wonder

To wonder what it could have been,
If only we'd been best of friends,
I miss him more than I let know,
I walk by hoping to see him calling my name,
A death that shook me to my wits

Rest on niccur,
You're dearly missed😫
Death sometimes take those we least expect it to take and we're left with nothing but memories, this person meant so much to me without even knowing it and I want his legacy to forever live on in the heart of people
Sep 2020 · 152
Where we the shining star that burned out so quickly

Or did we become too bright for the world to dim our light

You're the flame in me that died out so fast
I feel lost, I need to find myself again
Sep 2020 · 75
I thought it was love
Ohh I thought it was love,
All the time you'd look into my eyes
All the times we spent under the sheets,
All the time we spent hand in hands on the street,
Laughing at all our jokes,

I thought it was love,
When you'd tell me how beautiful I looked,
All the time you'd hold me close,
Promising never to let go,
All the time you'd tell me the world was ours,

I thought it was love,
When you told me the world was ours to live,
When you'd let me run and you'd catch me,
All the time you'd hold me and never let me go.

Ohh I thought it was love, alas I was only being a fool.
I know it doesn't have the ending I'd wish it had but I miss you everyday
Aug 2020 · 116
Lost in the universe,
like  a passenger,
A stranger in my own mind,
feeling alone abandoned, in despair and it feels difficult to repair.

I feel broken and find myself hiding a million feelings behind a simple smile
I feel lonely not being enough,
sometimes ugly sometimes not loved it hurts inside,
feels like hell that I can't escape from no matter how hard I try,
It keeps coming back,
I push them down and hide them inside me like a cacoon hoping they won't hatch one day.

Nobody should feel this kind of pain,
I push my demons away,
friends won't help, family too
Feels like two people staying in one body.

I feel lost in the universe, and it seems amongst other stars my shine feels pathetic, insignificant,
but I want better,
I deserve better,
my terror to thrills,
my anger to excitement,
my dead dreams to come alive again.

I know these feelings can be manageable,
but I don't want to have to,
Because I know some day they'll become intolerable,
I know I'll find myself soon,
I know I'll end this coldness,
I have to, before it leaves me soulless.

You deserve the world, whether you're a star among billions of stars, you deserve you own light and when you find your light,
I know you'll shine brightest.

Find your light.
This poem depicts a heart troubled, not knowing which way to go, seems at crossroads and knows there's something missing in thier life, trying so hard to find it but still couldn't get through... To you going through this I hope you understand that you can't and shouldn't give up on life.. not now, not ever
Jul 2020 · 38
How memories die
How do memories die?

Little drops of tears wallow down your cheeks to your pillowsheet, Each leaving a trail of memories, As your palms wipe past them, memories become lost sour, painful.

Day after day as they visit, they shed into your pillow sheet, Leaving trails as they go Fading, lost, forgotten.

— The End —