Mary Harris: Favorites

Feb 2016 Mary Harris

Not Alone

Feb 2016 Mary Harris

Megan H

And then in the end,
She collapsed into herself.
And she cried.
She cried like there was nothing left.
Because there wasn't.
She was alone.
Or so she thought.
Because when she closed her eyes,
She was surprised by what she saw.
Everyone she had ever lost was right there.
They grasped her tight in an embrace.
She realized then
That even when she felt alone,
The memories of the ones she loved,
Would stay by her side forever.
And she would never be alone.

#love #death #alone #happiness

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Monster

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Aesthete Flower

Monster

As she lies bleeding on the floor
She promised she would do no more
Harm to herself she really tried
But even she knew that she had lied
Now she is dying and no one is home
She has no help she is all alone
She wants to get up and fix it all
But there is no one left for her to call
Now as she lies on the floor
She hears everyone calling her a *****
She hears them calling her a cutter ****
Now she wishes she didn’t cut
She wishes the monster would go away
And leave her alone after today
She turns her head towards the mirror
And in it she can see
The monster lying on the floor is her
That monster that she sees, that monster is me.

#depression #self-harm #cat #ana #mia #monster #awareness

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

12|6|15

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Star Girl

12|6|15

Three days ago I started a journey of self help.
I started a journey of discovery
And, I'm not ready.

Three days ago I began taking anti-depressants.
Three days ago I stopped sleeping through the night.
Three days ago I got migraines that made me want to empty my stomach.
Three days ago I started a journey.

Why?
Because I can't deal with myself.
I can't deal with rejection and the pressures of day to day life.
I can't deal with the ideals and standards of other people.
I can't deal with the judgment.
I can't deal with the ***** looks.

I scrub my skin raw when I think of the look she gave me.
The mother of the man I love.
The man I adore.
Her eyes pierced through me.
And no matter what, a wound will be there.

Zoloft is not a quick fix.
It is a gateway to a way that I might be sane.
Maybe it will work.
Just maybe.

I can wish on a hundred thousand stars of things I need.
But this world only gives me the things I don't need.

I don't need the constant reminder that I am failing my body.
I don't need to be told I am mean.
I don't need to be told that I cause misery.
I don't need to be told that I'm making the wrong the choices in my relationship.
I don't need to be reminded that I am unwelcome, because you are close minded.

When I feel all those things I remember a younger me.
A me that was searching for something.
Anything.
I tried everything.
Even God

But there are some things that even He can't fix.

I was told growing up that depression wasn't real.
Well honey, it's all...right...here.

I am blamed by something I can't control.
How would that make you feel?

Three days ago I started a journey that I should have never stopped.
Three days ago I decided to do this for me.
Three days ago I started the search for a little girl who hoped and dreamed.
Three days ago I started the journey to regain my joy.
My hope.

Three days ago I started something.
Just for me.

#depression #hope #mental #health #mentalhealth #zoloft #antidepresants

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

How to Know You Aren't Okay

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Christina Cox

How to Know You Aren't Okay

Sitting on the bathroom floor
with lights off
and doors locked.
With mirrors covered
to hide the truth
of what you are.

#depression #not #okay

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Untitled

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Christina Cox

Untitled

Is it my heart or my head
that wishes I was dead?

#depression #heart #suicidal #head

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Open Prison

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Pluck

Open Prison

Souls that don't ache are always advising that we simply "open up more."
There's not a single band-aid on your body, how could you know what's it's like to fear love sores?
I do, so I cower in my shell, well my eyes shut, and slam, lock, blockade all doors.
But of course, it never really helps. New love sneaks in through the window cracks & the tears ooze their way out through my skin's pores.

#love #heartbreak #fear #pain

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Stand

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

elizabeth

Stand

I hope the next time
you feel beaten and broken
you remember the night
everything fell apart
and you could do nothing
to stop it
and you called me
afraid
in hopes I might fix it

Please don't lock yourself
inside your messy cave
and pull the blinds
to avoid the bright sun
as you sleep in past noon
something I've never known
you to do

Reach out and touch me
like that night we stood outside
in the misting rain, freezing
and exchanging puffs of air
filled with honest compliments
and your warm arms wrapped around me
as the sun started to rise

I'm not sure I can stop you
from running away
this time around
because my words will not speak over
the wounds being inflicted
by your careless friends

I would kiss the cuts
if you let me
but for now
all I can do is wait

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

Fingertip Glue

Dec 2015 Mary Harris

elizabeth

Fingertip Glue

He asked me to please not break your heart
and now he's tortured it
leaving you bruised and broken

I can fix it for a short time
with the warmth of my skin
and hearty advice that I cannot see
once it leaves my lips
and divides into four ears
that could benefit from listening

He asked me to please not break your heart
so I will not ask you to stay
when my own beating ***** is ready to explode

#love #heartbreak #friends #sad #heart #boyfriend #friendship #relationship #girlfriend #motivation