I am thinking of you sitting in a dark room with a drink in hand
Clenching your jaw like you do when you're trying to rein-in emotion

And I'm not there.
Even if I was, there is nothing I could do to take that pain away.
Not the guilt, self-hatred, or the anger.

And you'd just push me away anyways,
Holding me at arms length like you do
A constant wall in place between us.
Nothing for me to do.

I know you're sitting there,
Alone, no matter your surroundings
Thinking you should follow him
Asking yourself why you shouldn't just leave forever
Telling yourself it's all your fault.

You'll finish the night buried beneath the anguish and someone's body
Content for just a moment
Then sink back into the abyss you drown yourself in
Day in.
Day out.

You'll get up the next morning,
Alone, no matter your surroundings
With your braveface back in place
Disguised to the world.

But I'll know where you've been in your absence

**Because you tracked death on the carpet when you walked in.

I can't help but wonder what I did
Uncertain, unknowing.
What made you stay
But the moment you were away,
You just kept on running.
What magic trick were my hands weaving
Behind my back, unseen, unfelt?
What did I do to make you stay,
Am I guilty of manipulation?
Because once you stepped out that door,
You were never coming back,
And yet,
Before you left,
Before you took those steps
You said it was difficult, painful
That you didn't want to.

So what made you stay?
And what's making you run away?

No kind of tiny whisky white,
ethereal plane,
bridging all dimensions
little thing can crawl
under the 3rd dimension skin
where I live
and eat the kindred flowers.

One hundred percent of the time,
I'm at a loss for words.

We can't stop it, even though we would've liked to.

Seventeen million puppies. Nothing to eat. How does this work?

We're just tiny people hiding
Under a camper from the rain.
But, your skin.
Your skin is a trillion blankets under the stars.
The last day in April.
A day for colliding our
Stuff & Things.
I never know that anything
Is going to happen.

I'm just an atom with an electron to spare,
Wandering about,
Waiting for someone who's missing one.

It's the way you look into her eyes
when you talk to her.


And even when youre not together.
You still speak about her like she's your universe.


And I,
Im just a listener.

Behold, an ethereal incarnate.
Soulful, astute, and delicate.
Her sight instills inspiration,
Her touch strokes with passion.

Callow, pure, and wholly innocent,
Inwards, she sprung, fully vehement.
With a handful of zealous volition,
And hopes to earn love and ambition.

Dazed by a benevolent trance,
She danced with pristine stance.
But, oh, so little did she know,
******* pierced like an arrow.

Lo, gone were the days of viridity.
Past was learnt, hence gained clarity.
No brand of man, no spoil of deceit,
Can cull her stead like maize and meat.

She who dons an exuberant shield,
Whose mighty foes will surely yield.
Brandished crown of newfound glory,
Behold, a Queen—hear her story.

Poetry has a sensitive soul
A drive and impulse
Telling stories the way they are
Feelings of soberness
A heart felt word

Poetry has a sensitive heart
Beautifully immense
A heart of gold
Giving values to life
Adding years to life: Poetry is beautiful

Poetry has a sensitive soul
Like streams that meanders slowly
Like a river glorious: It Flows
Poetry has a sensitive heart,
A beautiful soul; A flying Angel.

Poetry is the signal
that
The soul sends into the world
Like the river, it flows into the sea,
yet the sea never gets filled.

Poetry is the fluid for the soul,
The liquid for the yearning of the Mind
That which quenches the fire
Feeding the deepest desires
Poetry is Gold in essence

Ovi Odiete©

Surrounded by green
The trees whisper their secrets
My heart is light and my mind is free
I stray from the gravel path
And find myself at a pond
The birds are chirping and the sun is shining
I think I forgot my sunscreen
It didn't matter though
In that moment I was alive
And one with the world around me
I breathe in the crisp air
It smells of leaves and the sea
As I watch the fish swimming
In the water beneath me

As the sun sets
and I turn to leave
I hear some footsteps
Catching up to me
And in my slow pace
I turn to see a young boy
His hair is matted
And he looks alone
Lost in the world as tears fill his eyes
I kneel down to speak to him
Ask him where his family is
He starts to cry as he speaks
Very few words but just enough for me

He claims no one loves him
That whenever he meets a new family
They get rid of him
Call him a burden
My heart hurts for this child
He can't be but 5
And yet here he is
The place of my peace
Seems to be his nightmare

I couldn't let myself leave
Knowing this little soul
Had no place to call home
I offer to give him a ride and a meal
While I call to speak to the authorities
His eyes brighten and tears threaten me
The sparkle of happiness is unexplainable
And my heart feels for him
So I lift him onto my shoulders
And we go home

No one knows anything about the child
His name appears nowhere and the police think I'm crazy
They come to check on him
But they can't see
How can you not see?
My mind is racing as I try to comprehend their words
They say I need some sleep
And maybe I'll feel better in the morning
I make a bed for him with blankets
And pillows from the couch
It's not much but it seems he's slept on worse
So he smiles and drifts off to sleep
I wonder what he dreams about

I wake up to a heavy heart
Tears choke my lungs
And I don't understand
Nothing has changed
It's just a new day
I head downstairs and the boy is gone
The pillows and blankets are tucked away
Exactly how they were the other day
Maybe I am going crazy

Days turn into weeks
And my heart still weighs on my chest
My muscles ache and now
I can no longer rest
I haven't left the house aside from work and school
I can't convince myself to do anything
But the weight on my shoulders
And my clouded mind
Beg for some relief
So I drive to the place that was my sanctuary
Until I met him

The grass has yellowed
And the trees have silenced
The sun burns into my skin again
But this time it hurts
I search for the pond but cannot find it
I walk for hours and still there's nothing
But a rustling in the brush peaks my curiosity
And as I break through the dying leaves
My foot sinks into a slurp of mud
A swamp lay before me
The water green and murky
I swear it can't be the same
Not the beautiful pond I witnessed the other day
I scan the water for the fish
Maybe that'd prove its different
But the same golden scales reflect back into my eyes
But there's something else
Something wrong
My reflection

I lean in closer to get a better view
A gasp escaping my lips in disbelief
Bags surround my eyes, which no longer sparkle in the light,
my hair flys in every direction
I see no life
I barely recognize it as myself
But that didn't disturb me so intensely
No, in those waters
The person that stared back at me
Was not alone
They supported something on their shoulders

As I look closer in disbelief
His eyes stare brightly back at me
But it appears we've switched
Because he has my glowing green eyes
And I have his
They're dark.
Empty.
His arms wrap snugly around my throat
And his knees dig into my ribs
He looks genuinely happy
And I swear I hear a whimsical laugh
Echoing off the water

And I realize all too late
That he was never really concrete
Only a concoction of my mind
A projection of part of me
A part so lost and alone
Playing the victim and
Begging for some attention.
And I opened my arms to him so easily

It's been years and he still haunts me
He weighs on my shoulders
Keeps me awake at night
Because if I sleep he's no longer the priority
While he drains my energy
I cannot imagine my life without him
He represents the deepest part of me
My damaged soul and empty heart
I chose to take on this responsibility
And my entire world has changed
The shadows haunt me on the brightest days
And the beauty i once saw
Takes a new form
as the dead inside of me.
Yet he listens when no one else can
He understand my fears and pain
As burdensome as it is to support him
I know, with him, I am never alone.

His name is Depression
*And now he'll never leave.