I rub my hands
Along my scalp
I watch the hair
Fall in the sink
Bleach blonde hair
With mousey brown roots
Locks upon locks
Falling to the sink
I tell myself I'm brave
I can do this
My hair will grow back
Yet I still cry
As I watch all the hair
That he touched
Fall to the sink
The hair that he stroked
The hair that he pulled
The hair that he brushed
out of my eyes
I watch him leave my head
Along with the last thing he touched
My hair

I thought
I was
coming around
to the idea
of being alone
Because during the day
it's easy
to be so alone
It's not until
the night falls
that I realize
I need an inhaler
But the pharmacy
is closed
and I'm
all alone
in my mind
Which is a
dark, scary place

I was fine
Until
I wasn't
and by then
I was alone
so nobody's here
to notice
I'm not fine
to notice
how alone I am

He doesn't really love me
None of these guys do
They're just looking
For a quick, hot ****

I'm no different
Than a trip to McDonald's
Fast food
Fast ****
It doesn't have to be good
It just has to be quick
Easy
Convenient
Cheap
With a short line

Three months later
And I still find
Your curly black hair
In my brush
In MY brush
Because for some reason
Three months later
I can't be rid of you
When I think I'm done
When I think I'm over
Clear
Fresh
Finally finished
Thoughts of you
Plague my mind
Memories flood me
Dreams arouse me
And I am
Overcome
I am yours
Once more
In those thoughts
Those memories
Those dreams
We're back
To the way we were
Happy
Loving
Wrapped in each other
Until I open my eyes
Shake my head
And scream
Scream at you
At the way
You ended things
The dream ends
And I remember
I'm just cleaning
A ******* hair brush

I want you to know
That I'm the best
You'll ever have
Because not many
Women
Could put up
With your *******
Your indecisiveness
Your inattentive responses
Your tired love making
Your hurtful jokes
Your empty love

Move on fast
Move on slow
Search high
Search low
I'll still be
The ******* best
You ever had
And that's
Your cross
To bear
Because I'm still
The best
And you're just alone

Lost without me
Without my love
Without my lips
Without everything
That makes me
The best you've
Ever had

When you write a poem
It makes **** more real

The emotions
Come to life
And you feel
Everything
All over again
Tears resurface
Anger bubbles over
All that ****
Comes back
Into existence
When all you wanted
Was for it
To go away
Forever

That's why
You wrote the poem
You wanted
All the ****
Gone
Banished
But writing it
Makes it real
All over again

Maybe that's
Why people
Don't write anymore
Maybe that's
Why people
Stop feeling things
Then they
Don't have
To feel them
Again

I want what we once had
But I want it
With someone else
Because you didn't
Appreciate
Love
Respect
My efforts

I just wish
I could find
A taker
Who wanted me
As much
As I wanted them

Because I'm tired of
Day dreaming
Reminiscing
Over what
We once had

I'm through
Thinking of nothing
But ******* you

I'm through
Giving you time
That you don't
******* deserve

I'm through
Kissing frogs
And ******* ****
To get what
We once had
When I'm
So worthy of it
Without you