the boy with the brown eyes
he’s the one I miss
and I long for his lips
even though we’ve never kissed

the boy with the brown eyes
who didn’t like his smile
I did not understand him
For a very long while

The boy with the brown eyes
he astonished me
I admired his perfection
That he did not see

Dear boy with the brown eyes,
I should’ve told you then
But you are ******* beautiful
And you have always been
[p.m.]

Our eyes meet
And yours
Pierce my heart
And for one moment
I lack air
My heart stops
And I'm lost
Somewhere
Deep in those brown eyes
I need your help
To find a way out
And then
When before I ask
For the escape route
You break the look
And leave me
Both breathless
And with
An increase heart rate
This heart
Also knows now
That I love you
Brown eyed boy
I can sleep now
Knowing you
And your
Sparkling eyes
Exist.

i had a thought.
i ran out of my room,
down the hallway,
and into the bathroom.

i wriggled out of my worn down, tie dye shirt.
hopping up and down as i pull off my
high-waisted jeans, pulling my pant leg with my foot as i
trample the dark denim to the ground.

i stand there naked, in front of the
harsh, full length mirror.
combing my fingers through my natural, wavy hair.
i contort my face in disgust, cocking
my head slightly to the side.

i close my eyes, and take one deep breath in.
when i open my eyes,
the reflection staring back at me is a thin, natural
beauty.

Her smooth ivory skin glows in the
silvery reflective glass.
Her stomach is flat and toned.
Her ******* lay on Her chest in perfect
proportion to the rest of her petite frame.

i run my fingers down the sides of my body.
my palms trailing along, dipping and
rising with the mounds beneath my skin.

i close my eyes and open them again,
this time taking my reflection for
what it really is.

i am fat.
my skin is pink and spotted with freckles the
colour of blood.

my stomach hangs low, covering the part
a man should see when i'm naked.

my ******* are big.
but not in the way you'd like them to be.
they lay there, sort of lop-sided.
hanging just above my ribs. Another place for
fat to take over.

the cuts on my thighs are hardly noticable
next to

all

that

fat

i can see tears in the eyes of the reflection staring back at me,
but i am numb.

i thought correctly. i am
fat. i am ugly.
Nobody in their right mind would want to
love me.

she
bent
to your
will
until
she snapped

now
do not
blame her
for
making you bleed
from the wounds
caused by her
splintering
shards

sext: i thought of you and put down the razor

Skins in contact,
sweat pouring from your hair.
You pump it harder this time,
demonic is your glare.

Arrest me,
undress me,
caress me,
only then you'll set me free.

Give me what I plead,
anything that would cause me to bleed.
At the back or in front,
I don't want no pet peeve.

Here you stay
And break me down

Hear me crumble
And shatter on the ground

Hear my soul
Be ****** away

And here my body
Will always lay

Your whole being is poetry,
from the way you talk,
the way you walk,
the way your lips,
form wrinkles,
each time you smile,
from your deafening silence,
to your soft voice,
poetry,
when you put your arms around me,
bringing me warmth,
against my cold, melancholic body,
when you hold my hand,
making me feel less lonesome,
making the moment grand,
you're poetry,
complex yet subtle,
defined yet undefined,
and I'm just a hopeless poet,
hopelessly trying to decipher,
hopelessly trying to write,
the ambiguous,
you.