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 Mar 2017 K-mari AJani Jones
Rai
Today my head is tierd
My body is aching
But my heart is happy
And my soul at peace

If it will be the same
This time tomorrow
Depends on wether I can bounce
Other people's arrogance
And egos
Away from my skin
Words burn
Feelings echo
Long after
A situation has past
I cannot exist
Away from
Friendship that holds me together
Just about, not because the glue
Won't stick but because
I lost some of the pieces already
And I yearn for such senseless
Wastes of time as
The days
I used to savour and
Used to keep me smiling just
just
About.
 Mar 2017 K-mari AJani Jones
Laci
Your stare, your burning glare
Never looking at me
Examining my soul
Your stare leaves me feeling naked and exposed
Your eyes like a mirror
Mesmerizing, haunting
In your eyes I cannot hide
A reflection of what I have buried

Skeletons in my closet
Flame flickering in my soul
Thick mud, bare feet
Moving through life without living
Your light shining at the end of the tunnel

Twisted branches of my mind
Whirlwind of spirit
Captivated by a feeling
Captured in a moment
Drowning in a dream

In the fogginess of dawn
In the haze of today
In the hope of tomorrow
Your eyes dance upon the horizon
Glimmering in faith
Forthcoming truth
Questioning all
My reflection
I feel as if I am being sexually molested by an invisible force, trapping me in chains. Though tiresome and alone, life sends a sense of distain. Brought upon me as it whispers insults through my right ear, fingers stroking my cheek while I shed a tear.
The news came out, and the world is ending
Tonight is our last night and it's just beginning
Our hands entwined and spinning
The beautiful music just keeps on playing

Just tell me where we need to start
Let me put my hands on your heart
And even if tomorrow doesn't come, we won't be far apart
As for us, only minutes to depart

So, stay right where we are
We've only ever come this far.
My friends aren't therapists,
They're the reason I survive without one
But I need to learn not to
Lean on them
Or when they go
I'll lose balance and come
Crashing
Back
Down
Stumbling upon the path I’ve been looking for,
With a quick look behind to see my friends and family.
They waved and started to take a different way.
I smiled and began to walk straight ahead,
Knowing that if I look back again everyone would be gone.

Lights showed up on the side of the road.
Cars driving by, making a highway.
All of this is silence even while noises come and leave
This is it, I thought and began to run.

Running made it all a field of grass.
Horses passing by me with a touch of the wind.
My hair following the breeze from the ocean.
Within the night all over the world.

Falling down in the sand.
Burying me from neck to toe,
Making it harder to get free.
Water began rising,
Crashing against me.

Within a second I hit the ground,
Choking up blood.
With pain to my back,
And light smell to my clothes.
A well known voice behind me.

I think it’s enough,
I’m by the end now.
I looked behind me,
With a dead look in my eyes.
As I saw her sitting in a pit of ashes.


I got up and ran into her arms.
I had been looking all over for her.
I felt happy that I found her.
I cried in her arms,
Finally we emerged as one whole soul.
She had been forgotten for a long time,
And She had finally giving up.
But then I came crashing down from above.
Making her heart almost stop.

I had been falling over the memories we had as one.
I came for her, and that only saved her.
We once were one person,
Until I changed and abandoned her.
But In the end I came,
and I ended the search of myself.
I have never felt so sick in my life.

Eating feels like a necessary torture, and sleep feels like an unwanted evil.
Stuck in the same cycle of waking up feeling disgusting, and not wanting to sleep because the longer I stay awake, the better I feel.

But even I can't stay awake forever.

But I try, God knows I try.

So I still live in these infected clothes in this infected house and I can't help but wonder where the hell my conscience went.

I feel weak every single day, and I can only hope that this week...

Can change everything.

So if I'm crying out to the TV watchers and the music citizens. To my best friends... some of which who won't even talk to me...

Help me.

I can't wake up tomorrow thinking that this will not pass us by like the sickness it is.

Or was...

But if somebody else is crying out, I will drop this sickness like a ton of bricks and run to wherever they are.

I won't feel sick if somebody needs me there.

So I can put a lock on the medicine cabinet. Not because I won't be able to pry myself away from it, but because I will believe with the entirety of my whole body that I don't need anything.

My family is made up of some of the strongest people on this planet.

I will not be an exception by any means.

So maybe I can wake up as a medical zombie, filled with my own drop dead weight.

I am tired.

But not tired enough.

Unlike the first wave of sick.
This one cannot be cured by any amount of overdue sleep.

Why do you think I write into the abyss of every night?

Because there is nothing more for me to gain from saying that I am helpless.

So I won't...

Wake me up when it's all over.

And then I can live again.
Time to live like you have something to gain.
Untimely,
The old woman's life had been made undying.

Her husband looked down,
Awaiting her with a frown.
And all the while the woman mirrored this frown,
And stared upon her velvet gown,
Looking for the words to fit her despair,
And causing stress upon her old hair.

The witch had found this to be her accomplishment,
Despite God's look of judgement,
Sealing the witch's fate,
Hanging her body like bait.

But still the woman sat,
With a velvet gown and a hat,
Hunched over on her rocking chair,
Playing with her gray hair,
Knitting more than just a shirt,
And feeling very hurt.

Her husband's voice still sounding fresh inside her head,
She killed herself and was laid upon her bed.

And God looked down with another sea of disapproval,
For a sin is a sin,
For a law is a law,
Her ghost drifted along,
Knowing this was wrong.

Her husband still looked down,
With a smile, not a frown:
For her wife had died for the chance to see him,
Even though she never got another chance to see him.
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