i dislike poems,
they welcome memories of you to waltz in my mind.
i loathe poems,
they make me reminisce every encounter with you.
i abhor poems,
they never fail to make me maudlin; pity myself.
i curse them,
i have unfollowed nearly every poetry accounts on instagram yet they still appear in my feed.
right,
then it hits me that i still am following some poetry accounts.
why?
because i enjoy self-pitying, victimising myself.
and?
i like to reminisce about the past.
not to mention,
the memories of you are irreplaceable.

I shouldn't think about you

I do

I want you to think about me too

I saw you in my dream
Is that okay
I'll ask for your permission

I shouldn't think of you


I do

I do

I hope you do too

Imagine if I was normal
With normal thoughts and normal feelings
In a normal family in a normal house

But why be normal
Because if I were normal

…

I wouldn't have you

I know you see it
Still remains
Dragging me down
But I enjoy the pain

The pain so sweet
It makes me strong
I love the feeling
For which I long

My eyes arise
To greet the sun
So pleasing yet
No victory won

Alas one day
I’ll come to find
I miss the treasure
Left behind

I want to be happy again
I guess I’ll just hide behind
My cold eyes
And empty smiles
Looking at you
Under the guise
Of childish hopes
And broken promises

I need to self motivate
Stop the self medicate
Stop the self deprecate
In ways I can’t emulate
I
Just
Need
You
To
Be there for me
Show you care for me
Stop this travesty
I
Just
Need
Love
To help me get through this
I
Just
Need
Love
To push me on
I
Just
Need
Love
To make myself believe
Everything is alright
Tonight

I passed you by
just like that, i just walked away
I had no idea I could pull myself to
And yet I am no longer imprisoned to stay

You looked my way
Just like that, you glanced by me
I hope you see I'm happier without you
I finally feel like I'm running safely free

I'm losing sight of what is real
Not sure what to believe

But I don't want to fall into your snare
I don't want to be all tangled up
Not in your lies
Not in my life