Haley Harrison

Haley Harrison 5d

Tempest

I wish I could expell
This wild beast from my chest,
This bottomless well,
Merciless tempest.
.
It roars and screams
For things it can't get:
Insubstantial dreams,
Uncollected debt.
.
And it isn't fair
That efforts mean naught;
When all is laid bare -
Love can't be bought.
.
I long and I ache,
At the mercy of fate,
Its give and take,
The cruelest bait.
.
The suffocating need
To not be alone,
Unrelenting greed,
Scathing to the bone.
.
It rakes its claws deep
Through my ribcage,
Makes me weep,
Helpless with rage.
.
Its loathsome fury,
Feral with want,
My judge and jury,
Inescapable haunt.
.
And it makes me think
That it's you I'm missing,
But it's really that link,
That has me reminiscing.
.
And I tried with such ardor
To find it once more,
But it's getting harder,
And my soul is sore.
.
Tired of hoping
And letdowns, in vain,
Tired of coping
With this constant pain.
.
If I were not godless
Surely I would pray
To finally convalesce,
To just get away.
.

16.04.2025.

#lonely #loneliness #yearning #solitude #single #distraught #sad

Haley Harrison Mar 2

Rome Burning

The last outpost of all there is,
muted colors of Rome burning;
my vast love no longer his,
looted, suffocated yearning.
.
It came sudden like lightning,
shook like spring thunder;
the flame of anger biting,
ripping me asunder.
.
I'm free, but displaced,
carried by a hurricane;
my tears - a waste,
buried with the pain.
.
And now, just emptiness,
stretching over scorched planes,
all-too-quiet heaviness,
poison in my veins.
.
I stand by its headstone,
this monumental thing,
mangled to the bone,
now dead and rotting.
.
Though finally I know:
there's no going back,
my feet fail to go -
paralysis attack.
.
Dismantled, worn down,
seared to the core,
managed not to drown,
but passed out on the shore.
.
And so, I wait, still silent,
for time to **** this last moment.
.

02.03.2025.
(for G. and me)

#breakup #brokenhearted #breakingup #closure #brokenheart #love #gothic #classical

Haley Harrison Feb 19

Haunted

If only I could hate you, just a bit -
the lonely nights would hurt less;
It's always late when memories hit,
no trace of light in the darkness.
.
There won't be another love like this,
rare as diamonds in the ground;
I wish to join the abyss,
hide where I'll never be found.
.
Our broken edges used to fit
together like a hand and glove,
and I doubt I'll ever find it,
another gift from above.
.
No one else before or after,
has come close to what you were;
Silver bells of your laughter,
Pierce my heart still, like a burr.
.
You're gone, you've moved on,
living life as if we never were;
I'm on my own, a wounded fawn,
days merging in a blur.
.
I want to hate you, I swear,
you haunt me against my will,
yet foolishly, I still care;
a dark void nothing can fill.
.
I fall and fall, ever deeper,
crawl to try and escape,
you are my own Reaper,
eternal shadow in your shape.

19.02.2025.
(for G.)

#heartbreak #love #romance #romanticism #brokenhearted #brokenheart #sad #breakup

Haley Harrison Dec 2024

Meditations

I'm made of cobwebs, shaded grays,
echos faded by the murky streetlight;
Festive blobs signal the holidays -
and ricochet off me into the night.
.
A thick, dull fog 'tween me and them,
a brick wall no one can see;
seamless weights in my hem,
and dust inside what used to be me.
.
And then there's you, a year away,
waisted tears, and prayers null;
an end thought for each void day,
a whisper-scratch in my old hull.
.
The words avoid me, skittish things,
like birds that flutter fragile wings;
the right ones are only fledglings,
too young for new beginnings.
.
And I wish that I could care for cold,
worn out flat 'tween mortar and pestle,
a forlorn growth ring in a tree of old,
trapped inside a rotting vessel.
.
.

17.12.2024.
(for G. And for me, I guess)

#depression #love #heartbreak #breakup #depressed #apathy #dissociated #dissociation #sadlove #brokenhearted

Haley Harrison Nov 2024

The End of an Era

Let me make my own mistakes,
and let me learn from them.
As ice freezes over lakes,
I will harden like a gem.
.
I don't regret leaving my heart out
to get scorched, crack in the cold;
a lesson needed to sow doubt,
to make caution take a hold.
.
I've learned, I've grown
through the pains;
I am now more my own,
experience in my veins.
.
And now I don't even feel the break:
like a computer gone offline;
a reboot needed just to make
this new update truly mine.
.
I will survive, I always do -
my shipwrecks an eternal theme -
and I'll re-surface, start anew,
with new stitching along the seam.
.

05.08.2024.
(for me)

#heartbreak #breakup #selfimpowerment #movingon #postbreakup #surviving

Haley Harrison Nov 2024

Homesick

Home, for me, was never a place;
That comfort and safety aren't tied to a space -
for me it's the people, and emotions they bring:
a hallowed steeple, a hymn to sing.
.
Since you left I've been homeless,
- a wandering wreck -
no refuge nor address,
a stone 'round my neck.
.
My friends have homes,
and I'm a welcome guest,
yet my soul still roams:
a traveler with no quest.
.
And my friends are springs,
fresh, clear, and pure,
but for one who is starving,
water's no cure.
.
I hunger, my love, for your lips on mine,
Heavens above, grant me a sign.
This beaten-down husk, this wretched shell,
A shadow in dusk, for you unwell.
.

31.05.2024.
(for G.)

#love #missingyou #yearning #longing #romantic #inlove

Haley Harrison Aug 2024

Torment

Against all common sense,
you still give me butterflies;
I want to tell you without pretense
how my heart for you sighs.
.
My fingers hover over the phone,
indecisive, nervous, cringing;
Since you left I'm so alone,
a kingdom without a king.
.
Words, my usual weapons of choice,
fail me when it comes to you.
I fear you'll forget my voice,
our nights; move on to someone new.
.
It's hard. It's frustrating,
this near-constant low;
Missing you, contemplating,
screaming into a pillow.
.
And memories, little ones,
just flashes of that high,
Bittersweet firefly-suns
of the days you were nigh.
.
These crumbs of text,
an occasional voice note,
Starving till the next,
Hungering for what you wrote.
.
I need you, I love you so
embarrassingly much,
Your smile, your eyes of doe,
the fire of your touch.
.
And yet it gets caught in my throat,
the selfish begging for your return;
so I just pray, in silence,
as I continue to burn.
.

01.08.2024.
(for G.)

#love #missingyou #nostalgia #inlove #romance #pining #yearning #lovepoem #ldr #longdistance