Red lights are gently painting my room
Gracing half of my mattress that rests on the floor
As I lean upon the window sill
I send empty glances to strangers
Only wishing for one to occupy my time
Until my neighbor finishes stitching up holes in my dress
In exchange for a pack of Marlboro Reds
My frail bones are aching for validation
Causing me to become desperate for the ability
To throw my skin on the floor
Tainted in prints
And beg why
Why it may only maintain it's survival
With the touch of wicked sin
Feeding off of high heels, drug store mascara, and soulless hands
Red lights
Why are there so many red lights?

I waited
Dazzled by the idea
Of your planet in my driveway
Your orbit around my house
Your stars in my gaze
I thought you just needed space
Sadly was I mistaken
See, instead I just waited.
No cold bite could keep me inside
And no sad thoughts made my cry
I just waited
I had this dizzy thought
That you had finally seen the truth
That I was there for you
That she was just a thing
And you realized you could use my weakness
To have what ever you pleased
You could have had me
When that was still me
You have arrived two years too late
You seemed to have missed my submissive stage
I said I'd take you back
Yes, I remember that
But that was back when
I sat and claimed post-trauma to you
I have become cold and empty
And I know no empathy
I know no forgiveness
But I sure as hell know bitterness
Yes, I am bitter
But not because I am still "hung up"
But, because I gave up
On myself
When I gave myself up on to you
I have no regrets
I'm glad I experienced this side of pain
I'm glad I know I can be born again
I am bitter, yes
But, sweet mistake,
I am so happy these days

He is a writer
Scrambling for paper
The moment he is inspired
Asking for second opinions
On whether his words fit
His ideas travel lightspeed
So he strays a bit
Crumbled ideas by the bed
He worries they're no good
But, that's just what the voices said
He's his own worst critic
He had a breakthrough
But he just cant fit it
Into the small setting that he placed
Worry sickens his face
All this hard work
But nothing to show
He didn't see this coming
Just a few weeks ago
He scrapped it all
It was tainted
He tries too hard to face it
See, there is nothing wrong
Not from the start
My love,
Your words are such art
My rambling writer
My paranoid poet
You made the patches of your story
Point your pen
And sew it

It may be more than enough
But I’ll keep trying
To satisfy
And ugly sunsets
Still end a beautiful day
The tides shatter
Though the sea is slow
If I drift away
Please let my father know
That his child found serenity
That his child found home
Now burrowed deep within the greens, I reside
I am gone, but still alive
Humbled by the tress I climb
Splinters, bruises
My scraped hands
Prove I tried
Say I can
As the west turns to the east
I find change collapsed at my feet
Desperate and Begging
For me to see
We were bound by destiny