Your eyes smoulder with an imagination that is even bolder than I could have dreamed and colder than this toxic air we've been forced to breathe.

You write poetry across your face to form a Gas mask of rythym, blocking out the hate yet sealing in ideas that might frustrate you.

You hear the birds in the trees and you read the articles in every magazine, you take in information like the bees to the Queen.

Your thoughts radiate an aura surrounding your entire body, you bleed history and pop culture facts, you need the written word like an addict needs their cigarette packs.

You're empathetic to your core, you feel what everyone else does so you hide yourself in your mind until you can categorize the emotions from the lies.

I know you can feel the love in your heart even through all the cracks, like a weathered and torn apart roadmap but you're taped together perfectly and even with a few wrong turns you always find your way back to me.

I said I'd go through hell for you
And that's just where I went
to return and find you gone
After my sentence was spent
Who was right?
Who was wrong?
I guess I'll never know
As I carry with me
That journey down below.

They tell me I am disordered
That the disease skews my vision
But I can't help that what I see first hand
Rings more truth that expert opinions

A battle of logic
A reassessment of my past
Solid justifications?
Or am I with in the wrath?

She stares at her reflection.
Recognizes her distorted perception.

Evil whispers fill her head
Self criticism is the only part that wants to be fed.

She's made huge leaps, fought her way,
And continues fighting for recovery to stay.

The biological drive can force you to eat
But that doesn't mean her mind is all well and neat

In the end, you never came home.
I sat by the door with my arms turning
to dust aching for you to return.
You left the kettle on
and I drowned myself in it.
Chamomile, Earl Grey, Lemon, English
who cares what the sachet says
as long as it's hot and burning
my tongue because every little pain
is a pain I've to endure.
It takes my mind off you.

triggered
you laugh as you say the word. this is all a joke to you
of course, there’s no harm to your fun
triggers are just excuses
of course

triggered
my trauma has become a prison
I cannot walk down the street without remembering
the things he did
my hands are always shaking
my eyes are always watering

triggered
you tell me to pull myself together
it was just a joke, no big deal
but believe me, I’m trying
I have been trying for years
holding yourself together is not nearly as easy as it sounds

triggered
my skin is quicksand
the more I struggle, the tighter it becomes
it is crawling with spiders and cockroaches
I am overflowing
my body is too small to hold so much worry

triggered
I do not need your approval to know that my panic is real
but
if you tell me I do not belong in your universe
with all the people who can laugh and play and trust each other
with the people who hear the word *triggered and laugh
chances are, I will believe you