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Jul 2020 · 74
Untitled
Ayn Jul 2020
How many more times
Will I die
Before I find life
In its scarcest places?
Jul 2020 · 56
Modulation
Ayn Jul 2020
Cry me a river,
Hum me a song.
Whisper me a shout,
Find where I belong.

Orchestrate me a melody,
Incinerate me a candlelight,
Shout me a far off whisper,
Let me fall to a worldly blight
Jul 2020 · 107
Moonlight
Ayn Jul 2020
Spiders weaving golden threads,
Through our dreams
And around our silent heads.
The life running through our hair,
Attracting dreamweavers to our minds.

But all it takes is a bit of a bite,
And the once golden thread,
devolves to red,
And the once lavish life,
Disintegrates to lead.
Jul 2020 · 54
Labelmaker
Ayn Jul 2020
Lines marking a shimmering border,
Silence marks the void between.
Life and death are all that stand
In the way of a world pristine.

The labelmaker does not discriminate,
The labelmaker creates the groundwork for it.
It’s the people that created the labels for the lgbtq(+ however more there is now) community, the ones against discrimination based on who you are or who you like, that discriminated people into groups based on who someone was or who they like.
Jul 2020 · 103
Silence
Ayn Jul 2020
Maybe silence is what I need
A break, away from love and greed.

An obsession of possession
And a possession of obsession.

How much longer
Before I turn deaf
In the dimming static
Of this forsaken planet.
Jun 2020 · 62
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2020
Numbers rising
Like falling stars.
Galaxies away?
No...
Right outside my door.
Covid numbers are rising around the world. We recently hit 10 million cases, and 500,000 (yes with 5 zeros) of those people died. Please stay safe everyone. We are having almost 200,000 new cases each day because everything is opening up.
Jun 2020 · 88
Cindering
Ayn Jun 2020
Striping flames
Burning names
Cindered letters
Breaking fetters
A novel of ashen lies
Slowly dies
Jun 2020 · 75
Fallen stars
Ayn Jun 2020
Ashes fall
Upon crows in flight.
Cawing in
A cloaked night.

Dancing sparks;
Floating up high.
The raven’s barks;
A simmering cry.

As the ashes call the crows,
The sparks burn the ravens.
Jun 2020 · 58
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2020
A citric eastern breeze
Beckons in frosted waves.
A mosaic of spectral sun
Drawn upon the fractured glass.
Surf exploding onto rocks
Like the trillions of stars
Now twinkling,
At twilight.
Jun 2020 · 62
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2020
The roses kneel
Before the trees
The shadowed reveal
Before the breeze.

The smell of rain
In the sky.
My tears are gone
And the well is dry.

Why am I welcomed
By burning pages
And culling voices?
Jun 2020 · 715
Father
Ayn Jun 2020
He is an *******,
But a good kind of *******.
It runs in my fam.
I abbreviated family to fam to fit the 5-7-5
Jun 2020 · 51
Roses
Ayn Jun 2020
Petals fly
Petals fall
Dancing roses
Sewing the fall.

Fallen petals laying, red.
Sewn by a simple thread;
The world’s card has been drawn
Fate is facing the early dawn.
Jun 2020 · 63
Internalization
Ayn Jun 2020
Taking into account
All the tension
That has come to pass,
I should have long since

Snap—   —ped

So why am I
Still standing
In one piece?
Me taking in the fact that I have awful social anxiety. It’s virtually impossible for me to enter a store or restaurant and ask for an application. I don’t know how people do that.
Jun 2020 · 78
Crows
Ayn Jun 2020
Three crows
Upon a line.
Three crows
Here to dine.

Lines are drawn
Upon the sky’s
Deep blue lawn.
The third crow
Was just a pawn.

Two crows,
Where’s the third?
Who knows.
Red lines are drawn upon a lawn,
It’s time to pay respects
To the long lost pawn.
Jun 2020 · 56
Living
Ayn Jun 2020
One of my best friends, and the third friend I ever made is finally getting a replacement kidney. It’s hard to express in words just how happy I am for him. He’s been a lifelong friend for me and I’ve had to live through the decline of it’s functionality. All I can do, is hope that tomorrow’s operation goes smoothly.
I’m glad I’m still friends with him.
Edit: before anyone gives me crap about how it isn’t a poem, just scroll right on down. You don’t need to point out the obvious. Thank you!
Jun 2020 · 84
Smolder
Ayn Jun 2020
The flame,
long since thinned,
Snuffed out by the wind

Only ashes remain,
Set to rekindle their flame.

All it takes is a small spark
To set the world ablaze
And leave us all in the dark
Jun 2020 · 144
Paper Madness
Ayn Jun 2020
As ink is left to fall,
Another paper
Is left to stain.

As my veins
Decide the path
Of my blood,
The ink in my pen
Decides the stain
Upon this paper.
Sometimes the stains
Are legible words.
Sometimes the stains
Are my blood.
Jun 2020 · 405
Undertow
Ayn Jun 2020
Brown seaweed
Sliding in the echo
Of a siren’s long lost lament.

Through the ocean
Not a sound shall break
The fragile fabric of silence;
It shall stand for an eternity.
Made the first stanza while talking to a wonderful person last night. Thank you ——.
Jun 2020 · 44
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2020
Now is the time
When those
Who normally seem
Sensible,
Become the
Insensible.
I have my own feelings about the turmoil this country is in, but I’m afraid to express my opinion about it. I might not say why some things are morally wrong without angering people. I am only 16. I can’t vote, I can’t get my license, I can’t do much. All I can do is be aware. I refuse to participate in this. Not because I don’t know who’s side to pick, but because I will not generate more hate and turmoil in this society.
Jun 2020 · 101
Skies
Ayn Jun 2020
Two skies
sitting up high,
Fading.

Two suns
Watching them fall,
Laughing.

One world
Seeing the collapse,
Crying.
Inspiration from “Stealing Society” by System Of A Down.
Most people think I’m like some emo kid bc I listen to metal, but really it’s just the fact that fast music is the only thing that will get me up hopping around and singing. Any fast, dramatic instrumental is good too. (rap is slow, bgm wise)
Jun 2020 · 194
Kayak
Ayn Jun 2020
Sliding through salty waters,
Spray hitting my face
Each time I dip the paddle
Into the murky creek.

it’s so serene,
No people,
No yelling,
No sirens,
Just me and the geese,
And the wind.

Even though I’m thinking
About my next move,
You’re still there,
Lying, beautiful,
In the back of my mind.
Kayak is a palindrome.
Jun 2020 · 114
Sightline
Ayn Jun 2020
What lies in the eyes
That stand just out of sight?

The void is endless,
But who can see that far?

If one is set to leave,
Why bother looking back?

Just because you’re out of sight
Doesn’t mean you’ve left my mind too.
Jun 2020 · 73
Fragmentation
Ayn Jun 2020
Thawing ice
Broken glass

Falling free
Without care

Living life
Timeless times

Injuring myself on
Fragmented barriers

Shattering emotion
Destroyed by what’s lost.
Jun 2020 · 88
Through Ice
Ayn Jun 2020
Through the ice
And falling even more.
She’s down there to catch me,
But the icy shards
Are freezing my blood.

A branch sticks out in my path,
Throwing me off balance,
And now I’m no longer falling;

I’m tumbling out of control.
With no idea
How to regain control.
I remember why I used to write so much.
There was so much to write about, and so much emotion to supply the correct language.
Ayn Jun 2020
I’ll do it in a poem bc this is a poetry website.

With each that comes along,
A timer is set upon them.
Why let the timer be?
When defusal is possible.

Why let the bomb explode
When just being friends is fun?

Living stagnant is painful
But losing to the timers
While time is stopped
Pains me more.

I have a question for you, A:
Why make me decide
Between two paths?

There’s always a third,
Right down the middle.
Defusal sounds better than defusing so... once again, I summon creative license to create better flow!
Yeah I know it’s not a great poem, sorry for the lack of quality everyone.
Jun 2020 · 160
Between life
Ayn Jun 2020
Life flows on
Even if we are stagnant.
Through all it will travel,
Harboring our emotions
And our experiences.

Nothing lasts forever,
But anything good
Is worth trying to keep close.
I’m sorry.
Jun 2020 · 48
Integrity
Ayn Jun 2020
Why should I
Take pride in myself
When there’s nothing
To be prideful of?
Happy june.
Jun 2020 · 52
Nerves
Ayn Jun 2020
Who ever knew
That happiness could
Wear someone out
As much as it does.

My emotions
Have grown drowsy,
And my head’s
A bit too feathery.
Sometimes I have to regroup and re-ground myself. Poetry is one way to do that. It’s weird to feel emotions hardly ever felt before.
Jun 2020 · 189
Ice
Ayn Jun 2020
Ice
Slipping on the ice,
And crashing through the glass.

Floating shards
Hovering in prismatic wonder,
Lighting my darkened mind
Like the thousand stars
Guiding me to
My long lost dreams.
Is it on purpose that one of the corners is still left in the dark? ;)
My interpretation of how love CAN work. A withering rejection that flowers into something beautiful. emphasis on can.
Jun 2020 · 50
Choices
Ayn Jun 2020
Why have all my choices
No matter how good they are,
Always hurt someone in the end.
Now I feel like I hurt a dear friend.
Jun 2020 · 81
Lingering
Ayn Jun 2020
Venomous voices
Tempting fate.

Listless lisping
And culling words.

Silence prevails,
Pervading my guilt...

And feeding my
Venomized thoughts.
The things I say sometimes...
May 2020 · 46
Time Expansion
Ayn May 2020
Six and a half hours
Of grueling yard work
Seemed like an eternity
Of endless seconds

Without you.
Yeah I know the name’s awful. I’m very tired. My IT and writer body isn’t meant for 6.5 hours of heavy lifting and shoveling dirt.
May 2020 · 42
Untitled
Ayn May 2020
Amongst a storm,
Inside the raging current,
Iridescent light
Shines once again.

Things are going
To be all right.
May 2020 · 68
Blank Space
Ayn May 2020
Maybe as time continues
Our wounds will fade,
And we can go back
To something like
How it was
Before.
...
May 2020 · 106
Wordless
Ayn May 2020
Soundless,
emotionless.
but emotion flowers up
like blackened roses,
but never shadowed lilies.

Words are a force to be reckoned
and I forgot my own strength.

Honesty isn't always
the best policy.
I'd say it's funny how quickly things can change, but really, it's not. Sometimes it's scary. I'm afraid, deathly afraid and nervous. If I was a train, you could call me a train wreck.
May 2020 · 73
bug
Ayn May 2020
bug
I can't help myself
from the abrupt distraction
of that tiny fly
Bonus of Covid #5: I have gotten good at catching flies in one hand, but only when I see them in my peripheral vision. If I focus on them it is harder to do.

Ugh it's always the things that are so small that BUG me.
May 2020 · 302
Friday, March 90th
Ayn May 2020
The leaves May be a May green,
And spring May almost be out,
But to me it is still March,
And April May never come.

May-be it will be March
Until I get back in August.
May-be March won’t ever end.
;) so that means in all of March I’ve been rejected 3 times, one of which I probably shouldn’t count.

Also I just realized that I have 72 followers. Thank you, you amazing 72 people! (I thought I still had 49)
May 2020 · 43
Speechless
Ayn May 2020
So many twists and turns,
Rocks in the road,
Broken bridges
Gapping broken land.
Maps never worked,
Nobody ever told me the direction.

Now it’s straightening out,
But I never saw the chasm.
You’ve left me to fall once more.
Is doubly in love even a thing?
May 2020 · 51
Dodging
Ayn May 2020
Shifting your soft stance
Discharging feint after feint
You’ve got me real beat.
It’s hard to keep up, —.
May 2020 · 64
Just Be.
Ayn May 2020
Be you.
Be what you are
Don’t try to uphold an illusion.
It will shimmer then fall,
And then you’ll be left to crawl,
Because they didn’t catch your fall.

As long as you be you as well,
I’ll be me.
Wow, I must be going mental, actual notes!

The first stanza is for me, the last two lines are for —.
May 2020 · 66
Changes
Ayn May 2020
It’s different.
It racks every node
Inside my frail body.
It’s different...

But it isn’t awful,
In fact,
It’s enjoyable.
It makes me feel nervous, it makes me want to hold back. But who’s holding me back besides myself? I don’t know.

Also I’m frail but probably not super frail. I may be “strong” but anyone could break me like a twig, ****.
May 2020 · 44
Guilt
Ayn May 2020
Even if one thinks
That what is right
Is wrong,
There is an undeniable guilt
That follows in wake.
May 2020 · 73
Smoke
Ayn May 2020
The cinders rise
In flumes of choking smoke
But refreshing rivers flow
And create my lifefull cloak.
The waterfall splashes
And cools the forest
Restoring what was lost.
May 2020 · 53
The other side
Ayn May 2020
Now I know
What Vance felt like.
It hurts even more
Now that I get
Why he felt
The way he did.
Now I feel bad for both vance and —. (Nope nobody getting names.)
May 2020 · 89
Numbers
Ayn May 2020
Maybe life
Will recalculate
All of these chances
For my failure.

And maybe
I’ll succeed.
May 2020 · 46
Oh hey
Ayn May 2020
Apparently I’m at 10,000 words on my profile. That’s pretty cool.
May 2020 · 73
Thornless
Ayn May 2020
It always seems to be those
Who think of themselves as weeds,
That end up being the prettiest roses.
May 2020 · 68
Ember
Ayn May 2020
As cinders rise
From the ashen flame,
Drops of icy thoughts
Quench the fire
Of my heated rebellion;
A suicidal plan.
Some people seemed to be writing poems about embers so I joined in on the fun! None of them are lighthearted.
May 2020 · 56
Untitled
Ayn May 2020
Maybe life
Just wants me to suffer.
It’s not like anybody ****** up,
Because I’m already ****** up.

Maybe cool metal
Can freeze my sunburt arms...
May 2020 · 43
Untitled
Ayn May 2020
Swirling drops of screeching chalk
Memories left untouched.
Life unwound,
And a life better left in the ground.
Too many emotions to write, so I’m taking a break for a while.
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