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Oct 2023 · 111
ε
Ayn Oct 2023
ε
The starlight on my ceiling
And the silence in the air
Echoes like an untouched ocean,
quivering in absolute stagnation.

The wings of an angel,
The kiss of loneliness.
Life’s palpitating heartbeat
Brings Anxiety to its knees.

Drifting into an opal iridescence,
my subtle starlight turns to faded dreams.
The wistful echoes of my ocean
Turn like the amber gears in a sunset clocktower.
A timeless, transient frame becomes our reference,
and our stardust turns to amber shards once more.
I had such a hard time with the last couple lines, but I tied them in enough. I wonder if this actually reflects my nights. Welp whatever!
Oct 2023 · 76
Camellias
Ayn Oct 2023
An ancient dragon’s horn
Summons me to existence.
Bringing with me a veil of life;
A vernal, radiant blossom,
Gracing the earth with your kindness.
I protect the golden ichor
Streaming from his wounds.
Your blood shines with brilliance,
Flowing freely in self-propagation.
Emanating this amber veil of life;
An autumnal, iridescent flame;
A blossom in its own right.

Growing from your body
This single flower stands.
A gentle volley of wind,
Guiding my unsure hands.
A love formed of simple bliss…
Is my protection your stoic iris?
I tried to make this good but I won’t know until i look back on it in a couple years.
Ayn Jun 2023
As Seraphina stepped onto the ground, she remembered her late father. His words, once foolish and heretical, began to make sense after all that had happened. The sky was freedom, but her feathers fettered her to the ground.
I’ve been writing off and on for a while idk i thiught id post some stuff
Jun 2023 · 126
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2023
The silence was inevitable, however, the light she shone soon became their harmony.
Jun 2023 · 255
“Hey.”
Ayn Jun 2023
Him uttering these three time-ridden letters where more than enough to bring his family to tears.
Jun 2022 · 1.4k
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2022
As the final wisps of daylight fade
Your eyes become so clear
And the dimly burning streetlights
Become the silent starlight,
Lighting our lover’s path dear.
Jun 2022 · 211
Untitled
Ayn Jun 2022
A silent echo,
Reverberates.

Your warm words
Resonate.

Even a welcome change
can become difficult.
May 2022 · 423
Trust
Ayn May 2022
As we got up and took our first step,
I looked at him, and he looked at me.
A silent nod exchanged in unison,
To convey our undying trust
To convey our unspoken love.
Lol I wish he liked me like that…
May 2022 · 371
Windswept Wisps
Ayn May 2022
The wind’s soft melody
Tearing through the landscape.
Gently brushing my knee
And roaring in my ear.

The silent drop of a windswept tear,
The call to a motion all too clear.
A storm throughout our minds
Tearing at our walls like rinds.

The silent beauty
And the harsh cruelty
This is the duality of a tempest.
I don’t think this turned out how I originally planned but that’s alright
May 2022 · 195
The Grace of Ambition
Ayn May 2022
As the flame in his eyes faded,
He remembered what he left behind.
Nothing could describe the intensity
Or even what he felt in that fleeting moment,
As he turned the keys
And started his long journey home;

His journey for forgiveness.
These short stories are kinda fun. Definitely different from my older poetry
May 2022 · 372
Untitled
Ayn May 2022
As she struck her final chords
His heart beat in tune with her fingers,
Birthing a new generation.
Apr 2022 · 326
Untitled
Ayn Apr 2022
Thoughts lie adrift, like the mist;
Fading into the dawning light.
With this hew sun, I am blessed;
Renewal will come when the time is right.
For now, I must spread my wings,
Readying my soul to take flight
And bask in the vernal sunlight.
I’m alive, so yay! Working on being better now, it definitely was rough for a bit tho.
Mar 2022 · 416
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
I call for the moon,
Welcoming its gaze.
It’s gentle, cold beams
Render my skin blue,
And bring light to my being.
Mar 2022 · 190
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
The mind is a vast cage,
Full of twists and turns.
Once you fall in,
You can’t come out.
Mar 2022 · 200
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
Nothing helps anymore.
I feel it every night.
When will this hell end?
How can I make these feelings stop?
I’m afraid to tell anyone what’s happening because I’ll make them extremely worried. But I don’t even know if I’m able to save myself from this anymore, so I need to say something to someone. I just don’t know how much time I have left. Depending on what I do today it’s either really soon or a couple months to a year away.
Mar 2022 · 169
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
Their words consume me,
Telling me silent lies.
But you can only see the light
Which I cast on your eyes.

When will you see right through me,
And save me from this madness?
I’m too far gone to save myself.
Mar 2022 · 140
home
Ayn Mar 2022
I fall asleep to the spirit’s melody;
Drifting along iridescent shores,
Welcoming all that passes before it.
An unforgiving chokehold sets in
And i am rendered unable to escape.
The silence of a bed;
The welcome of the world of dreams.
I can’t get out of bed. I’m wasting away a day. F in the chat.
Mar 2022 · 259
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
I say good morning once more,
Your feeble pleas fall silent
As i exit the door.
Mar 2022 · 104
I know it’s hard to do
Ayn Mar 2022
Close your eyes
You’ll come here soon.
Run away from this dream,
Fall into our tune.

It’s all a dream to me,
This horrid melody.
I call when you can see;
Setting the lifeline free.
Thanks for all the fish.
Mar 2022 · 120
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
Daunting voices call my name;
Each breath full of manic mirth.

The sunlight falls
Like distant snowflakes,
Dusting a golden plain
With an auburn hue.

As the sky grows dark,
I see less and less,
But hear more and more.

A crescent guillotine hangs in the sky
As I absentmindedly envision
These fruitful moments to be my last.

The mirthful voices once more,
And engulf me in their mania.
My head hits the floor
While my consciousness washes away;
As if it were an eternal shore.
Mar 2022 · 129
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
Manic streams of sunlight fall,
Devouring the darkness below.
From one insanity to another,
A cover up for what’s lost.

You hide the truth inside the dream,
Yet you cover it up once found.
You fear the truth;
The endless pain
Because you can’t except it’s gone.

Why keep running, little one?
Your simple fun has just begun.
Mar 2022 · 135
Untitled
Ayn Mar 2022
Why have i been given so many chances?
So many sparks to fuel my fire?
At some point the sparks no longer help
And I’m covered in sparks and fire.
Mar 2022 · 124
J
Ayn Mar 2022
J
What would you have thought?
I was fine all day to your knowledge.
All you heard was
“it’s been especially rough today.”

Would you have been shocked?
Sometimes i regret my choices.

Would it have been better for her if I didn’t turn around and step back in?
Would it have been better for you?
Mar 2022 · 183
E
Ayn Mar 2022
E
What would you have thought,
If that was my last text?
A simple stupid joke, no closure.

Would you look for a reason,
Only to turn up blank?

What if you weren’t there?
What would have happened in the end?
I fear to contemplate it.
Mar 2022 · 85
M
Ayn Mar 2022
M
What if time had stopped
In that very moment;
Never to continue?

What would you think,
If I had become the autumnal leaf,
Drifted away by the wind?

Would things be different
If I paused indefinitely?
Would have it been better?
The things you say make it seem as if things would have ended up better if I never came back around. Maybe you’re right.
Mar 2022 · 78
Serpentine Silences
Ayn Mar 2022
The river flows forth,
Like a vermillion serpent,
Gliding effortlessly
Through the morning mist.
Ok so I thought about this one a bit. Idk if the meanings i used are poetry legal or not but we’ll see if the poetryFBI breaks down my door.

The serpent represents evil, and the red represents bad emotions. The serpent also represents rebirth or new life, which attributes to negative emotions cycling through my head over and over. The morning mist is what’s happening rn lol. 4am mood.
Feb 2022 · 86
Untitled
Ayn Feb 2022
Even in the dark, comets still fly
Like a radiant moth called to flame.
Hidden among lost and frozen stars,
Acceptance lay still and forgotten;
A consistent game of stagnation,
Until the hunter found the fountain;
Until you found me.
This poem is my feelings of a while bundled up into one poem. A lot has happened since I last posted and only now am I in the mood to write, now that it’s all almost over. Each line has 9 syllables, until the last line breaks the pattern.
Feb 2022 · 94
Untitled
Ayn Feb 2022
Like a flicker of wind,
Sparking against my skin;
The moonlight fades
And she is gone once again.
Feb 2022 · 285
Untitled
Ayn Feb 2022
Your faith in me
Scared off what’s left.
I thought I was free.
But you’re still a burden i heft.

You can never see this mess,
For I’ll hide it until the end.
Ill never be any less
Until my soul begins to blend.
Feb 2022 · 86
Untitled
Ayn Feb 2022
You yell,
You cry,
You scream my name;
Say your in pain.

As i swing my fracturing arm;
Ready to lift you up,
You swat it away,
And I shatter.

As my pieces fall to the ground,
All I can think of is you,
And everything i could do,
To help you get through.
I can’t keep ignoring myself to help you.
Feb 2022 · 86
Untitled
Ayn Feb 2022
As we fade beyond the horizon,
I sleepily sink into your eyes.
When the golden stars scar the skyline,
I’ll become one of your silent lies.
Jan 2022 · 251
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
Lightly gazing off into space,
Listening to the gilded stars
When the streetlamps turn to starlight.
And the dusted sky lights aflame.
Jan 2022 · 83
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
The wistful whims of flurries
Made apparent by its fragile mark.
We speak freely within the wall
But are silenced by snowfall.
Jan 2022 · 248
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
A flowering stagnation,
Bringing silence to the air.
A listless trepidation
Descends into nothingness,
Like it was a grain of salt
Dropped into an auburn marsh.
Sometimes life just stops.
Jan 2022 · 78
Home
Ayn Jan 2022
Like the song
Of a stone;
Sing along,
All alone.
4 syllables in each line, which is kinda interesting how easy it was to put together in comparison with my usual amount per line (6-7).
Jan 2022 · 123
Balancing
Ayn Jan 2022
Coldly bleak blackened walls
Housing a discreet warmth.
Within such listless halls,
We find the stars alight.
Dwelling inside the void
Like an innocent blight,
You stand, full of spirit.
Fragmenting listlessness,
For only void hears it
Void given thought,
Light starts to blot…
The string draws taut.
Jan 2022 · 71
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
The melancholic melody
Brings forth the voices
Of the long lost autumn leaves.

Whispering among the winds,
Elegantly threaded echoes
Resonate with the depths of my being.

Shaken at the roots
Yet strengthened at my core,
I feel my freedom return once more.

With all our shadows comes the light,
Casting rays around,
Fueling our ever blissful delight.
A wonderful time we all once knew,
But, even then,
We never held our promises true.
Jan 2022 · 113
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
Crawling through the wastes,
I wish for the flame.
To fly above the rest
To have nothing but a name.
My hope and interest
have kept this dream alive
And allow me to thrive
Even in these darkest moments.
Fire is purifying and equivocal.
Jan 2022 · 81
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
Echoes permeate the muffled air,
Bringing the song of life
To this old barren landscape.

Ripples in the water
Beckoning the snowfall,
Like the call of death
To an unsuspecting passerby.
Jan 2022 · 181
Untitled
Ayn Jan 2022
To be silenced
Is to be freed.
My tongue is far too vile,
Spitting toxins and vile
Into the minds of others.

Preying on the weak,
The merciful,
And the dutiful.
Jan 2022 · 90
forgiveness
Ayn Jan 2022
An unseen gesture,
It’s meaning left to speculation.
Our silent words drop like sunshine
Onto an amber autumn field,
Treating our long-forgotten wounds.
Treat others the way you would like to be treated. I have long ago forgiven you, but I won’t forget you. You have not forgiven, and you will not forget. What more do I have to do to set things right?
Jan 2022 · 173
Signals
Ayn Jan 2022
Dawning on me
Like a red-stringed melody,
The sunrise of a new year
Beckoning new light
Into our lives.
Dec 2021 · 87
Untitled
Ayn Dec 2021
How many small lies
Have I imprinted
How many are left?
Dec 2021 · 68
Untitled
Ayn Dec 2021
Suffocation:
A silence so potent
Where the air itself freezes,
And life no longer breathes.
I hate what I’ve done and I want to destroy myself for it. Why do i hate it? Why do i hate myself for it? It was all okay. Nothing was wrong. We both enjoyed it. You want it to happy again but i feel sick thinking about it. WHY?
Dec 2021 · 63
Untitled
Ayn Dec 2021
A silent echo;
An internalization.
We come to reason.

Though reasons are lies;
A guise among the many.
Don’t hide your treason.
Dec 2021 · 66
Untitled
Ayn Dec 2021
The vile thorn
Piercing like an unseen razor.
Infecting the wound
Like a midsummer overcast;
Sudden and volatile.

It whips and warps you,
A slight touch of the thorn;
A graze with death’s finger.

Within my mind the thorn resides,
An affliction to my mind.

I am dull,
I am vile.
Dec 2021 · 92
Untitled
Ayn Dec 2021
You tease and toss me,
Beckon destruction and strife.
You apologize for nothings,
And terrorize my way or life.

Your motives are unclear,
The emotion you hold is invisible;
Silent poetry which I can’t hear.
But why do you belong here?
Why do I allow you to stay when all you do is harm. I don’t feel like myself. I don’t even know what you think. I’ve never been less confident in knowing how someone feels than when I’m around you. I’m afraid of what you’ll do to me. I’m afraid of what I’ll do to you. If you’re anything like what I think, I’m just going to hurt you in the end. I’m sorry.
Dec 2021 · 164
You Scare Me
Ayn Dec 2021
The lingering mist;
Slowly ruptured by daybreak,
Uncovers my fears.
Your emotions scare me. What do they mean? What even is love? How can you hold such a strong emotion? I’m sorry but you are the terror to my world.
Dec 2021 · 97
Welcome Home
Ayn Dec 2021
As the life in your eyes began to fade
I saw you wings decay,
Like a autumn marsh
Turning from amber to beige.

Everything you had was lost,
Yet you fight remains;
An inferno among the flames.

You rose, an empress among the monarchs,
And finished, a champion among winners.

You’re a falcon in the wind,
A ruler of your world.
You never lost home, and now you’re here.

Welcome home.
Dec 2021 · 77
Are You Alone?
Ayn Dec 2021
Time fades beyond the horizon
Like a gentle crisp breeze
Pulling the autumnal leaves into the air.

Should we stop pretending?
We’re in the house of flies.
There’s only our loss;
Nailed to the cross.

You’ve lost your wings,
And I’ve got no courage…
Who are we to begin to flourish?
The house of flies references a song called “change (in the house of flies)” by deftones. I implemented the use of the house as a term for a rapid and unexpected change.
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