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Mar 2020 · 112
I lost a friend
Alice Mar 2020
When I think of her, nothing compares
She made me strong, and I hope I made her
She made me realise that even if it crash, doesn´t mean it will burn

Funny how we promised eternity, but look at us currently,
I lost a friend.

There was no apology,
There were no tears,
It happened so carefully

Sometimes I wish we never met, other days I feel fortunate,
I lost a friend.
Jul 2018 · 292
in the therapists office
Alice Jul 2018
We are not leaving this room
until it´s over,
we are not leaving this room until
we learn to love each other sober,
full of medication and therapy,
we were liers,
only said things that they want us to
feel...
when can we stop pretending mom, when can we tell the truth
Jun 2018 · 1.4k
Dear you up there
Alice Jun 2018
If I confess you my sin,
would you finally let me in?
Your book say I'm sick,
but your words tell me I'm forgivable.

If I shout "Amen",
would I be a better women?
Your followers say you will send me to hell,
but your words say show compassion.

They say "Prise the Lord!",
but I don't know what for.
I'm still looking for my hallelujah,
maybe I can have faith in you again.
Religon is a hard subject.
Apr 2018 · 368
unsent letter
Alice Apr 2018
Mom, hi
I just want you to know I passed by.
and..
I did´t knock on your door,
things have changed, do you remember our war?

Mom, how are you?
confused?, yeah me too.
my words usually write down themselves,
this time my pen strikes, and my vocabulary is overwhelmed.

Mom, hi
I just want you to know I passed by.
and..
I did´t knock on your door.
Call me, when you understand you need me to forgive you.

- love, your daughter.
You hurt me.
Apr 2018 · 254
black lungs and pressure
Alice Apr 2018
I find similarities,
between society and cigarettes;
filtered and poisonous,
deadly, but yet so hard to quit and leave,
addictive.
Apr 2018 · 263
I´m guilty
Alice Apr 2018
sirens,
he called them
on my mom.

knife,
she pointed it
at my dad.

screamed,
as loud as I could
at the people taking me.

home,
was ruined
and I feel the blame.
Apr 2018 · 182
atheist who lost everything
Alice Apr 2018
Religion
take me under your power,
because I need something to believe in.
Sometimes, I wish I was religious.  It seems nice.
Apr 2018 · 882
To big shoes to fill
Alice Apr 2018
«In addition to this, you let him go.
Not because you have to,
but because you need to,
need to break a heart.
take their breath, because you don’t have enough oxygen to breath.
Maybe you think you are dying, and want everyone else around you to be in your pace.
Because once, you were the heartbroken one, and that ******, right?

Or maybe you are just immature.
Your eyes, and his too, may see a full bloomed woman on the outside.
On the inside however, you are a lost girl, wandering in a too big world,
and the urge to fill whole cities with your ego is too tempting.
Because your soul and mind haven’t connected and found it self yet.
Can you even walk in a ladies heels, woman??»

I say to myself.
While I wiggle down the street.  
With invisible black, tattooed tears, right under my eye.
I adore the oxygen within my lungs,
like an addict taking drugs.
…Or like me, stealing love filled hearts…
Apr 2018 · 299
The colours of our chapter
Alice Apr 2018
In the beginning he craved pink,
so, I exposed my body and let him tattoo it with ink.
As our path turned healthy green,
he then crowned me as his only queen.
In that exact moment i knew; i was addicted to him like caffeine.
After that I got myself mislead, in every possible way, because;
If he wanted red,
I could rip my body apart until i bled.

Then we turned blue, 
and there were nothing else to do,
than to cry my crystal tears for and over you.
Everything felt black,
the only thing that could save my was for you to come back.
But then the slightest drop of colour crossed my dark canvas, it was a light shade purple.
Suddenly things didn’t feel so hurtful.
Now I’m smiling sunny yellow, dancing with pastel colours 
and smelling red roses.
In my life I now have a colourful rainbow, that for you probably don’t matter, but for me; It´s the colours of our chapter.

— The End —