Shaking hands reveal the truth
I should have seen it, when my eyes brimmed with tears as I confessed my love for you,  
And with eyes downcast you whispered 'I love you too' but your hands shivered
I should have looked deeper
When my friend sighed 'everything is okay"
But with those forced words, came hands that shaked
I should have realized when I told myself 'I'm getting better' and an earthquake passed through my fingertips
I now know, to look past the deception and seek the truth your hands will show

When did the thought of death become more welcomed than the thought of life

Sickly sliding slimy claws around your heart
Your breath comes in desperate pants hot and fast
You hope this panic will end, but know you cannot last
For anxiety is desperate to become your soul companion

You hear his howl and shiver
The beast lingers in wait
And though you try to evade him
You'll fall for his bait

She stood like a statue.
Perfect skin layered on a perfect body.
A ******* model.
She makes men turn their heads to look at her.
The type of woman who squeals tires.
Gorgeous *******.
Stunning hair.
She stood like a statue.
She was stone.
Spent hours.
Doing make-up.
Styling hair.
Picking clothes.
Smiling her plastic teeth.
Flashing her neon sign mind.
Slogans.
She lived all of them.
She stood like a statue.
Drop dead gorgeous.
Living idol.
Men wanted her.
She was courted by them.
Money lavished upon her.
She felt she deserved it all.
Scorned her fellow women.
Ridiculed her peers.
Too good to be in their company.
She stood like a statue.
Beautiful as marble.
But utterly, totally,
completely empty inside.

We drank our coffee,
ensuring each other
that it would not be
the last time.
I remember when
I could not stop
words from falling
out of my mouth.
So many things to share.
But coffee grows cold
if left unattended.
And sentences that
once rushed out so
effortlessly slowly
turn to indifference.
Sometimes we can
still manage
platitudes, in the
hope that this can
create conversation.
Sounds, but no connection.
Together, but distant.
Sip your coffee slowly.
Let's savour what few
minutes still remain
in one another's company.
A casual hug perhaps,
or just a shaking of hands.
We begin the process
of forgetting one another.

I miss you already.

The piercing cold has frozen my hold.
As my breath mists in the wind, I lose my mind in my sin.
Why did I walk through the pitch black portal?
Why did I sell my innocence for a price that wasn't priceless?
I look into the mirror, my face is what I see.
Yet my eyes hold a darkness, how is this me?
So I turn in horror, step out for some air.
But from me escapes screams of unfiltered anguish 'til my voice is like a bear.
Why did I walk?
Why did I sell?
Let the cold take me.
It's warmer than my hell.

So full of care and love.
  **Precious time given to others.
    Even when you're not wanting to.
       Cuz you're a person of nice quality.
          I have so much respect for you, friend.
            And you should know I will never let go.
               Love imbues your essence and your spirit.

Wondering how to imagine flowers
in a city covered with concrete towers.
There are so many signs that lack truth,
when heart is still and will never heal.

I walk the confines of my walls at night,
only sensing the world out of sight.
What am I searching for, I do wonder,
as confusing images blink on and off.

What does it matter if I never find
the answers to questions so unkind?
With poignant malice so pronounced
do the crawling lice stand so proud.

I sense that I shall always remain
filled with dread that fosters pain.
Internally the wheels will grind
as I try and cease their rolling.

I understand the midnight moon,
for it signifies my private womb.
There are so many signs that lack truth,
when heart is still and will never heal.

I waited for you...
So long I waited for you...

Do you know how many storms I endured for you?
The battles I fought against demons to keep you in my heart?
I would have walked off the end of the world to be with you.

To call you mine...
But you never came...

The storms grew more violent and colder.
The demons became stronger over the seasons.
How long do you think I could withhold myself?

I sat alone...
You never came...

So as the frosts of this cold love overtook my heart
Coating it in a layer of ice, and letting it freeze solid;

Then you came...
And you picked up my heart...
And you dropped it on the stone floor...
Shattering it into a million pieces...
Without a second thought...

And people ask why I hate love.