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"disconnections" poems
If only sleeping didn’t bring out the demons in me Dark and darker entities popping stopping staring at me for what seems like eternity maybe higher than that maybe in my mind no reality of me living where I am supposed to be. I see eyes that’s always the beginning they take me inside I overthink the circumstance where I’m the pupil but I’m always sacrificing myself to be the victim. Flashbacks possibilities deja vus of me disconnections disconnects its blocks of memories. Stagnant thinking it’s the brinking of uncertainties and the insomniac tendencies left beneath me by my depressive states I question its beginnings. Where the pain lies in my side every time I wanna die and think back to why it confuses me. Waking up buried in ***** dust though sometimes sparkly is always as terrifying as the last time. Even when you get out you’re never truly free in such a dark city. Let’s try howling like our pets tried when our neighbors died when I wake up I hear her scream. No clocks ticking it’s just the doorbell ringing and the death chimes on and on. We’re tearing through the jungle book of matrix look a green computer screen but it’s all black and brown they throw some color red in it. But it just blurs and blurs and you’re not sure, you just let yourself fade into the chaotic white buzz instead of letting yourself looking at the bigger picture. It’s on a ladder it’s so confusing every rail means something monkey bars leading seemingly nowhere that’s where the blur starts that’s where my heart dies that’s where I go blind. Entities blurring creation forget your dreams why have we forgotten where we’ve come from
0
Jul 20, 2018
Jul 20, 2018 at 4:41 PM UTC
Dreams
If only sleeping didn’t bring out the demons in me Dark and darker entities popping stopping staring at me for what seems like eternity maybe higher than that maybe in my mind no reality of me living where I am supposed to be. I see eyes that’s always the beginning they take me inside I overthink the circumstance where I’m the pupil but I’m always sacrificing myself to be the victim. Flashbacks possibilities deja vus of me disconnections disconnects its blocks of memories. Stagnant thinking it’s the brinking of uncertainties and the insomniac tendencies left beneath me by my depressive states I question its beginnings. Where the pain lies in my side every time I wanna die and think back to why it confuses me. Waking up buried in ***** dust though sometimes sparkly is always as terrifying as the last time. Even when you get out you’re never truly free in such a dark city. Let’s try howling like our pets tried when our neighbors died when I wake up I hear her scream. No clocks ticking it’s just the doorbell ringing and the death chimes on and on. We’re tearing through the jungle book of matrix look a green computer screen but it’s all black and brown they throw some color red in it. But it just blurs and blurs and you’re not sure, you just let yourself fade into the chaotic white buzz instead of letting yourself looking at the bigger picture. It’s on a ladder it’s so confusing every rail means something monkey bars leading seemingly nowhere that’s where the blur starts that’s where my heart dies that’s where I go blind. Entities blurring creation forget your dreams why have we forgotten where we’ve come from
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14
phasical circumlocutions of basic, embodied life.. i am an infant still  i teethe and moan in lonely darknesses solar revolutions          earthling orbits and spheroid whirls                                   an axis of worlds                                   adulterated limbs my adulthood limns an architecture's disconnections        thin, the layers undulate                       of elbow's sway and kneecap right i am an adult still  i teethe and moan alone in darkness, light
0
Oct 22, 2015
Oct 22, 2015 at 4:51 PM UTC
walking, sitting, climbing
The problem wasn't the money or the fame, not the taunt, ripe bruises shining from her heart or the painful creak of her hip bones when she moved. No, the problem wasn't the seeping words or the tightness in her chest every time she passed a church. It wasn't the way the holiday lights made her head dizzy or the floating sensations in grocery store lines and it was definitely not how her associates nonchalantly patted her back in passing, blatant excuses to walk on. It wasn't the smell of soap or the staring for hours at the ceiling. It wasn't the long, smooth metal of the numbing pipe or the sweet taste of Sangria wine. It wasn't the many times she'd been used or the indignation that set in when the walls were quiet. It wasn't even the tapping pipes that kept her awake at night with their torturous monotony. The problem was not the comparisons or the dismissive tendencies, the disconnections, the draining of her energy or even the isolation. It was not the quiet meditation or the constant spirit guide speak, not the unpaid bills on the mahogany desk or the whirring sounds of a radiator about to explode in her only transportation. It never was the monetary lack or the diseased reality she was never given the choice to escape from. No, the problem was the sadness, living there in the base of her spine like a tall, thin castle spearing up into her vertebrae until her whole being ached. It was the way the sadness made her muscles swell, and her face become pasted to cotton pillow shams, the frown lines starting to make their way to her chin and the visuals consistently invading. It wasn't the crass indifference piling up on her skin like bones, the remains of every person who had touched her and left, leaving another layer added to the angst. Instead it was the secrets housed inside the sadness, catacombs of skeletons break dancing in her ballast, as if her tears were raindrops and the sobs a symphony. So no, it wasn't the way she robotically moved through her day or the smiles she feigned, not the haze in her eyes left by too many nights of crying or the sleep where memories faded. It was just the sadness. {recorded version https://soundcloud.com/venniekocsis/the-sadness} v.k poetry copyright @ dbv publishing 2013
0
Dec 3, 2013
Dec 3, 2013 at 2:46 PM UTC
The Sadness (with a recorded version)
The problem wasn't the money or the fame, not the taunt, ripe bruises shining from her heart or the painful creak of her hip bones when she moved. No, the problem wasn't the seeping words or the tightness in her chest every time she passed a church. It wasn't the way the holiday lights made her head dizzy or the floating sensations in grocery store lines and it was definitely not how her associates nonchalantly patted her back in passing, blatant excuses to walk on. It wasn't the smell of soap or the staring for hours at the ceiling. It wasn't the long, smooth metal of the numbing pipe or the sweet taste of Sangria wine. It wasn't the many times she'd been used or the indignation that set in when the walls were quiet. It wasn't even the tapping pipes that kept her awake at night with their torturous monotony. The problem was not the comparisons or the dismissive tendencies, the disconnections, the draining of her energy or even the isolation. It was not the quiet meditation or the constant spirit guide speak, not the unpaid bills on the mahogany desk or the whirring sounds of a radiator about to explode in her only transportation. It never was the monetary lack or the diseased reality she was never given the choice to escape from. No, the problem was the sadness, living there in the base of her spine like a tall, thin castle spearing up into her vertebrae until her whole being ached. It was the way the sadness made her muscles swell, and her face become pasted to cotton pillow shams, the frown lines starting to make their way to her chin and the visuals consistently invading. It wasn't the crass indifference piling up on her skin like bones, the remains of every person who had touched her and left, leaving another layer added to the angst. Instead it was the secrets housed inside the sadness, catacombs of skeletons break dancing in her ballast, as if her tears were raindrops and the sobs a symphony. So no, it wasn't the way she robotically moved through her day or the smiles she feigned, not the haze in her eyes left by too many nights of crying or the sleep where memories faded. It was just the sadness. {recorded version https://soundcloud.com/venniekocsis/the-sadness} v.k poetry copyright @ dbv publishing 2013
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81
A simple golden band full of promises. So often unworn to protect its fragile nature, now a phantom reminder things lost. Locked away to help forget, but my thumb still absently rubs the place it use to rest. A memory of five long years connected by smiles and featherlight kisses, laughs, tears, and frustrations, disappointments and disconnections, leading to that final break of a home thought to last till death. That warm band now stone cold telling more than words ever could of love abandoned and forlorn. A band now used in deceit to fool potential mates, rather than the symbol it's suppose to be. But still it brings pain to the mind of what could have been of what should have been of what would have been.
0
May 12, 2013
May 12, 2013 at 3:10 AM UTC
Phantom Burden
*TURNING and turning in the widening gyre The falcon cannot hear the falconer; Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world, The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere The ceremony of innocence is drowned; The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity.* W.B.Yeats In a time such as this, in darkening days Without screeching witches Frightened banshees, buggered old men Searching for solace, eyes streaming with icicle-lust- Gangrene facebook: torn-up, shredded twitter The cries of the disconnected, Wailing! Wailing! In a time like this, in darkening days, The disconnections come in waves! Searching for reason amongst the unreasoning, Hunting for sanity within the insane, Identifying the dead from amongst the living. Wailing! Wailing! Email excreting venom Internet exfoliating lies-politicians wrapped In deceit- A cold time of it, a wretched time of it. Only within our hearts does hope lie. Only there Away from conflict and disorder Away From the capricious cacophony of biased debate. Wailing! Wailing!
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Nov 17, 2016
Nov 17, 2016 at 6:36 PM UTC
WAILING! WAILING!
I miss cigarette talks where I broke myself down for you, bleeding from my soul instead of my veins. I miss when my cigarette burned out faster than the girl holding it. I miss breathing you in with smoke, choking on laughter, not panic. Mumbled disconnections over your car stereo mean more than my empty conversations with God.
0
Jan 24, 2014
Jan 24, 2014 at 3:02 PM UTC
cigarette talks
Soft! ( it's a dyin sound A Subtle lonely sigh It shatters the night! HERE WE ARE! -----where are we?----- . Will anybody answer now?) -___- CONTEMPLATING! What? WHAT ARE WE-----contemplating With all our Might? ---- CONTEMPLATING within the soft sigh of The dying as it Sounds ---- -- Will anybody answer now? ------ All images The symbols of olden stories Simply expressed So that the truth of the day Might be seen Known And dealt with -- These are useless now . We are left to our own devices We must speak clearly WE MUST ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS WITH TOTAL HONESTY AND COURAGE We must enter the story.! We must stand true to what we are CONTEMPLATING! .. There can be no disconnections No obscuration No hiding No lying . We are to be ONE WITH THE DYING -- It is Our sighs sounding -- The QUESTION LONG LINGERS we must answer now ---- -- Wake up kids! You are not an EXTRA In some phoney tv advertisement A product! A mere HUMAN ***** Seeking love In a sterile high school environment Attempting To end the boredom of your parent's Mastorbatory existence Within their enslavement To capitalism and its dehumanizing games! -- You are put here------FREE! . To think for yourself To LOVE as yourself . To hear and to heed The dying! The soft sighs Of lovers The subtle new images Formed out of the remnants Of all the criminally unnecessary suffering --- Soft! The dying sounds Yields to REBIRTH'S SONG Sung aloud By the FREE SOULS the DARING LOVELY COURAGEOUS CHILDREN (Such as yourselves) --- Racing thru the corridors Out to the streets Leading to whatever it is YOU ARE CONTEMPLATING do not be afraid to say it now -- THE WORLD IS YOURS do not be afraid to say so, Now
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May 1, 2013
May 1, 2013 at 9:32 PM UTC
dying sounds
Soft! ( it's a dyin sound A Subtle lonely sigh It shatters the night! HERE WE ARE! -----where are we?----- . Will anybody answer now?) -___- CONTEMPLATING! What? WHAT ARE WE-----contemplating With all our Might? ---- CONTEMPLATING within the soft sigh of The dying as it Sounds ---- -- Will anybody answer now? ------ All images The symbols of olden stories Simply expressed So that the truth of the day Might be seen Known And dealt with -- These are useless now . We are left to our own devices We must speak clearly WE MUST ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS WITH TOTAL HONESTY AND COURAGE We must enter the story.! We must stand true to what we are CONTEMPLATING! .. There can be no disconnections No obscuration No hiding No lying . We are to be ONE WITH THE DYING -- It is Our sighs sounding -- The QUESTION LONG LINGERS we must answer now ---- -- Wake up kids! You are not an EXTRA In some phoney tv advertisement A product! A mere HUMAN ***** Seeking love In a sterile high school environment Attempting To end the boredom of your parent's Mastorbatory existence Within their enslavement To capitalism and its dehumanizing games! -- You are put here------FREE! . To think for yourself To LOVE as yourself . To hear and to heed The dying! The soft sighs Of lovers The subtle new images Formed out of the remnants Of all the criminally unnecessary suffering --- Soft! The dying sounds Yields to REBIRTH'S SONG Sung aloud By the FREE SOULS the DARING LOVELY COURAGEOUS CHILDREN (Such as yourselves) --- Racing thru the corridors Out to the streets Leading to whatever it is YOU ARE CONTEMPLATING do not be afraid to say it now -- THE WORLD IS YOURS do not be afraid to say so, Now
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102
Underneath a duplex in it's basement a wide assortment of pipes and appliances are mounted everywhere. Some pipes hang from the ceiling disconnected. Holes stuffed with insulation in the concrete foundation. The musician may sit and listen to the sounds of rushing water, boilers and furnaces kicking on and find music in it. The poet may find beauty in the mystery of it all and mention it as a metaphorical line in an upcoming piece But when the plumber walks down he sees it for what it truly is. He understands the sounds, the disconnections, the holes left behind by absent appliances, what goes where and why. Inside his mind he sees every movement of every machine, can pick any problem out of sounds and gauges. Imagine having an acute understanding of the world around you and how to work with it. I'm starting to think being a dreamer is more of a coping mechanism than anything. I'd say I aspire to be a plumber But I'd just be another poet making another stupid analogy.
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Jan 17, 2018
Jan 17, 2018 at 2:21 PM UTC
When the plumber walks down
As the water falls I feel my soul reawaken Colors are brighter More vivid Greens coalesce into lush gardens of life Made more pronounced by the grays of scattered boulders Whose placement steers the water to lower climbs As the water falls I am falling with it It’s power cleanses my heart Opening my soul up to muted browns Possessed by both life and death as leaves turn to soil That breathes life into the skeletal limbs that anchor the forest canopy Below Earth’s baby blues As the water falls I become swept away Dragged further from the disconnections That mute even the yellows of the sun Pale to that of the myriad mountain flowers drawn from stark purples to contrasting reds That remind me of both pain and happiness earned on the trail of life Bruises that paint my battered body with the story of water and the gravity which causes us to fall Do not save us For we have become free While falling
0
May 10, 2024
May 10, 2024 at 2:18 PM UTC
Free Falling
Eight minutes. Eight minutes, the journey of light from the sun to her windowsill. It's here she'll sit, waiting in her velvet chair with a patience so still. Fingers tap against the cold white marble, thinking about jumping. But she's tried before, and hands grabbed her wings and pulled them back and made her feathers stuffing. And then the Angel thought about the moon- it was created by imperfections. The angel took a step back with a hearts new rhythm, already feeling the disconnections. The light only ever blinded and burned what was beneath the halo of a righteous follower. She kisses the darkness and the stars weren't hidden, they held her power. Eight minutes. Eight minutes, the journey of light from the sun to her windowsill. But she isn't home anymore with a chair to fill. She gathered her folded wings and ran And learned how to fly without the light, just because she can.
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Jun 22, 2015
Jun 22, 2015 at 10:15 PM UTC
Eight Minutes
babies are birthed from the darkest. the LOVE of creation, from the darkest. the light of life from the dark. without the current in the fluid the brain would not spark. in order to stop you had to start and so I propose being neutral. these days we could use some neutrality. some of that prior unity recognition. the initial condition. the balanced act. the grey only looks that way with the blue sky shining when the sun comes around. contrast creates definitions. provides a canvas for the reflection... communal disconnections, normalcy in alone. here, we are meant to moan and groan and throughly love the lust, the bones of this life. with the I sight the commune becomes hindsight, the WE shrinks down to one, alone, wondering, competition to get to a conclusion just an end of some pass-time action. choose one or the other. each holding its truths, the necessary rules. so I try to be a neutral being standing right on the middle of both. I was raised on the coast, the waves only rising and falling, crashing, laughing at the nights fate. each rise rolling down into the valley, the pit. giving time its due. then, surface to the moon and prepare the ride again. the neutral being, press upon the sides there is only One. allow the insight to ignite from within, embrace the ease of reality, regardless of perception. be quenched, release. ALL is One. an ode to my stars, I am One, learning to balance. I thank God I witness.
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Nov 22, 2015
Nov 22, 2015 at 2:42 AM UTC
the neutral being
Open your mind and think.. Don't allow our inherent dysfunctions to create disconnections Cant you see? Just like you and me We are the victims of our Fathers; and so are they The long line of social inculcation - when did this start? For centuries we made believe that we are the greatest of all species Unique, intelligent and special in its own way We have forgotten We have lost the idea that we are all humans Sharing the same planet with everybody else We have let greed stain our minds Our wisdom - tainted with desires Bernays knew it, ****** knew, Gandhi knew Some used this advance to manipulate and some to emancipate So think! Don't let your desire father your manipulation Don't let your ignorance nurture your fear Think... That's what made you special That's what made you human You have a mind which may not understand everything - which it should be But think. Explore Our world is as broken as it is But it will heal I may not live to see it But I have lived a life with the idea to change it
0
Apr 4, 2016
Apr 4, 2016 at 11:48 PM UTC
Think
As countries continue to be more interconnected we need to look forward and develop a plan that eliminates our disconnections working toward one language one nationality one culture and they should all be mine so I don’t have to change at all.
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Feb 21, 2022
Feb 21, 2022 at 4:40 AM UTC
Globalizing
Caution! Watch out for Russian bots. They're out there to deceive you. Share if you will the messages, But who do you think will believe you? Bots show up on the screen of your phone, Your tablet, or your computer, And if you're on to their tactics, they Resemble a pesky suitor. Suitor? No, more like a stalker-- Disruptive and insidious-- Whose sly, deceitful game plan is Destructive and invidious. Recognizing the bots in social Media isn't so hard. But many a Twitter or Facebook fan Is frequently caught off guard. The bots are extremely useful for Encouraging disconnections. They've also proved to be handy for Influencing elections. Putin will say, "Bots? What bots?" Ah, but he's a sly one! If he can strengthen a road to disruption, He will fortify one. Hazards of our computer age: Troll farms and bots, Causing frustration and trying to Manipulate our thoughts. -by Bob B (2-28-18)
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Feb 28, 2018
Feb 28, 2018 at 8:45 AM UTC
Attack of the Bots