Anastasiya Antropova

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

Sometimes poetry is like a war:
Even though you're so tired and small,
You put your strained muscles back to work,
Overcoming and jumping the walls.
And when you've literally run out of strength
In this wild and insane pursuit of truth
Either rise to the challenge – or quit,
But quitting is also death.

#thoughts #poetry #challenge #war #questioning #tired #death

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

Welcoming

Silent steps on my doorstep in shadows
Simply walking inside from the lake
You erupt my still waiting with shyness
And white snowflakes you leave in your wake
I'm enjoying your crisp frosty whisper
Street lights flickering behind window panes
Crowds outside chant their “Merry Christmas”s…
You came, winter, you finally came.

#christmas #winter #nature #waiting #warm

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

the afterglow

There's something fleeting, floating in this fancy,
Like fairy-tail we meet in midnight dreams,
Like ocean tide that brings its warmth upon us
In gentle gracious effervescent streams,
I see you there like flowers meet the sunshine,
There's so much happiness inside it almost shutters,
And bubbling wonder, and a wish to see you smiling,
And then my mind drifts off and my heart flutters…

#love #impression #fancy #happiness #wonder #wish #nature

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

a panicked obsession

Please don't die before I do
Cause I don't wanna live without your smile
Don't wanna leave without returning
Don't want my dark without your bright
Don't wanna miss your sleepy turning
Don't wanna taste when there's no pie
You cooked for me delightful morning
Don't wanna pick a petty fight
Without desire in me burning
Don't wanna dress up with finesse
Without your eyes on me, so deep
Don't wanna hear a word from press
Without your words that make me weep
Don't wanna have a soul that can
Survive without your nasty moods
Don't wanna stop being a stan
Look out for you in darkest woods
Don't wanna make a whole day through
Not knowing what I never knew:
What I'm supposed to ******* do
To live A DAY
Where there's no you?

So please, don't die
Before I do.

#sadness #loneliness #longing #hope #wish

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

For anything

A curly smoke in dark and dusty passage
I came as soon as I could get your message
One silent sigh escaping from my lips
As I look up, your shadow soft and steady
Obduced in finest leather, fingers dip
And pull me close
To feel you breath
And I am ready

#first #desire #love

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

Little big things

Knicknacks
All over my place
Late cinema tickets
Dinner face to face
A figure at the window
Pair tea mugs
Under the blankets
Warm awkward hugs
The hair drier
At six am

I'm finally happy

With you,
I am.

(It was a hair drier so ... early driving me nuts, but i realised i wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Well, you probably know how it goes)

#feeling #things #love

Anastasiya Antropova Dec 2020

a witness

…battle is lost, your wounds are open
breathing has stopped, you're lying there
broken

busy telling you, 'get up', 'wake up'
'open your eyes' 'come on please…'

but you've come this far
(i love you)
now rest
(i love you)
(don't go)

in peace
(please...)

A fragment of an old poem that I wrote when I was afraid that a person dear to me might be suicidal. It turned out okay, but the nightmares of that time haunt me still.

#loss #suicide #grief #witnessing