I want to be touched by you
but not in the conventional way
oh no
I long to be touched
spiritually
emotionally
I want you to undress my mind with your thoughts

My tolerance for pain is high
My tolerance for people is low
Life keeps going overwhelmingly too fast
When all I ever grew up with was slow
I hated myself for being different
Yet I couldn't force myself to change
To fit their mould and expectations
I didn't want to be just the same
I felt guilty for wanting different
No one told me it was okay
I find it difficult to allow myself
To ignore what people have to say
I'm afraid of judging eyes
Critical minds and shallow mouths
That judge how they see it
Or what other people have found
Slowly I am learning
That being myself is okay
I'm allowed to, I'll try to be
Unapologetically me, everyday

I'm simply two dozen spins around the sun
Empty shadow among the crowd
With a broken spirit, wounded heart
Beautiful hesitant head is bowed.

I bring tragedies to comforting nightfall
Stories cling to my chest
Longing to connect, afraid to trust at all
Tired but sleep refuses to give rest.